vent- dd is breaking my heart

thebubble09

i just posted on the breastfeeding board about problems i'm having with my dd who is 15 months.  on top of that, basically feeling guilty that my milk supply is so low and scared that she will start rejecting nursing, the only word i hear all frigging day is daddy.  dad dad dad dadadada daddy?  all. day. long.  she only wants him when we're both around unless she wants my boobs which are now malfunctioning.  i know this is common and i know im old news since im with her so much more (i work part time and go to school 2 nights a week) so i get that she's excited to see daddy... still, it would be nice for her to say mom.  like, ever.  or ma.  or anything that expresses her desire to be with me.  i feel sad and defeated and jealous and worried.  and, obviously, pms-sy.

thebubble09

i realize she may want to wean.  if she's ready then that's just a natural part of her development and i will of course honor her needs.  that doesn't make it any less sad for me though.

Wufroggy79

Does she say mom at all?  From reading your post, it sounds like she hasn't said this word yet??  If that is the case, don't worry.  My DD said both dad and dog before she got around to me.  D words are a little easier.

isacdimi10

My oldest only recently started acknowledging my existence in the house. She didn't say momma until about a month ago. About 25-30 words came before that.

She loves me but is her daddy's girl. It made me sad but I just went with it. She's starting to love on me now, will let me hold her if her dad is around. It's nice but most definitely brand new. 

+SMACE+

The 'daddy' thing is a phase. DS went through that at about the same time. Now it's back to all mama all the time. Well, 95% of the time.

thebubble09

i dont think she has said mom yet.  others disagree, but she has never said it to me about me.  she makes the sound, but it's not specific.  the only time it is specific is when dh and she play this game at night in which he starts to call MOM!  after the bath so i can come up to nurse.  then he gets her to say MA!  but its mimicry. 

nancy30005

thebubble09:

i realize she may want to wean.  if she's ready then that's just a natural part of her development and i will of course honor her needs.  that doesn't make it any less sad for me though.

I completely understand; I went through this too. There are great resources out there for BFing, but not so much with the emotional tolls of weaning. It's completely normal to feel depressed (for a short amount of time) during this process. I still nurse DS (only at night before bed) but cutting down was harder on me than him. Stupid hormones! 
I wish you nothing but luck and feel free to PM me if you need anything. Hang in there, mama. You did awesome.

ETA: My DS is 20 months and will say "Dad" like a champ. And "Dave", the cat. He doesn't say anything remotely close to "Mom".

missmolly511

I feel you; my DD will writhe and scream in my arms and then turn into an angel the second I hand her to DH. Just try to appreciate that your daughter has a healthy loving relationship with her father, because science is showing that that factor alone is SO SO SO important for developing into a healthy stable woman! I was a total daddy's girl all my life, probably until my DD was born, actually; I don't think I ever truly appreciated my mom until I realized what she did for me by doing it myself.

fancynewbeesly

Don't feel bad. My daughter hasn't said dad or mom yet. However she does say more when she wants food.  . 

skio

Aw jeez, don't be heartbroken. I think it's a very normal thing, especially for little girls. My D points to DH and says "Da!" all the time. Or points to the door after he's gone and says, "Buh-buh, Da" because she misses him. As soon as he gets home, huuuuge smile and "Da Da!" all around.

I work one day a week and every time I get home and I get excited to see her, she glances at me and looks away like she hasn't had a clue I've been gone. I remember when I was pregnant, the thing I looked forward to most was being my baby's #1; being the person that she'd want when no one else seemed right. And I sooooo don't have that kid! Miss social butterfly will go to anyone with arms and totally prefers her daddy. 

So, yeah, you're not alone. And like others have said, the d words are a lot easier for babies to say over the m words. 

ETA: I weaned DD down to nursing 2x per day by 13m an she self weaned off the last two. I was not ready for her to make that decision and it was a little sad. It's also very normal to have excessive sadness as BFing ends because of the hormones. Be sure to talk to your doc if it becomes unusual for you. 

stdldb29

thebubble09:

i just posted on the breastfeeding board about problems i'm having with my dd who is 15 months.  on top of that, basically feeling guilty that my milk supply is so low and scared that she will start rejecting nursing, the only word i hear all frigging day is daddy.  dad dad dad dadadada daddy?  all. day. long.  she only wants him when we're both around unless she wants my boobs which are now malfunctioning.  i know this is common and i know im old news since im with her so much more (i work part time and go to school 2 nights a week) so i get that she's excited to see daddy... still, it would be nice for her to say mom.  like, ever.  or ma.  or anything that expresses her desire to be with me.  i feel sad and defeated and jealous and worried.  and, obviously, pms-sy.

 

I weaned my daughter at 15 months because the supply was going away...honestly, it was really hard for me. I guess because I knew she was probably going to be my last baby and she was growing up...but I completely understand.

And, my daughter also did the "dad" thing for a while, but now---she wants me again!  

pinkiemo

Don't worry, this phase will pass. My DD was exactly like that and then this morning she all but kicked him out of the house. He said he was bummed out all day because of it, but she's been telling me to hit the bricks for a long time now. Just got to roll with the punches. Sorry you're having a tough time.

Hesterlicious

DS has been the same for the past few weeks. I couldn't get him out of bed, or ready for bed. I got no good night kisses and barely get to read half a book to him before he wants to back to daddy. Yesterday he did a complete turnaround at lunch time and wouldn't go near DH  and made me snuggle and read books  for an hour He was in bed when I got home from work so I hope he still likes me.

It's a phase. He's done it a few times before, though not as extreme. Expect it to switch around a few times and take all the snuggles you can get when they come!