My mom and I were having lunch the other day, and I was telling her that if/when it came to the point where DH and I had to decide whether to do IVF or adoption, we weren't sure which we would choose. She replied, "Oh definitely do adoption. You won't have to go through the hormones and you won't have to spend all that money." I replied, "Um, what? Adoption can cost as much if not more than IVF." She was shocked. Her response: "I thought adoption was free! Don't you just go to a local orphanage and pick up a child?" Sorry mom, doesn't work that way and hasn't for quite some time. It amazed me that my intelligent and savvy mom had such an antiquated picture of adoption. Granted, until I started doing more research, I had no idea just how involved the process could be.
Re: My mom thought adoption was free
LOL! Maybe it's because we've had several adoptions within our family/friends - but that sounds like Daddy Warbucks and Annie to me! I am glad that you were able to educate your mom!
Don't forget - adopting through the foster system IS FREE. 100% completely FREE. In California, they actually PAY YOU to take foster kids, and some cases, the monthly stipend continues after adoption is final and until the child is 18.
So your mom is sort of right, but that is the public way of doing it - not via private agency as is now more traditional since most states have done away with orphanages and have created the foster/adopt system.
Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle!
April 2011 CP @ 5 weeks
Well you can give your mum some comfort that in my home country the fees are VERY minimal. You pay legals for getting the adoption order (which is a court order after 12 months placement) but you don't need to pay much more than that if you go through the government (and not a private agency).
Then again there were only 5 kids available for adoption last year, so I'm not saying head to Australia :-)
GL!?