Community› The Bump Message Boards› Late Term and Child Loss
Late Term and Child Loss
New Discussion

Received their ashes yesterday...

sloannmarksloannmark member
in Late Term and Child Loss

MH and I picked up the boys' ashes yesterday. Another confirmation that this experience was not a dream... I cried myself to sleep at 7:30 last night. Because they were only 17 weeks, there weren't many ashes, but we plan to put them in the ocean on father's day...the funeral home gave us a candle with their names on it- it's the only thing I have with their names...

Anyway, just needed to tell someone. 

Severe endo & fibroids, IVF #1 BFP with twins, Gabriel Mark (5/20/12) & Zachary David (5/24/12)- said goodbye to my two angels at 17 weeks due to pprom. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

IVF#2 FET 9/24, Beta #1 10/3...

My Blog: http://theunfixableme.blogspot.com/

Report Reply to Post

Re: Received their ashes yesterday...

  • JessicaRobbJessicaRobb member

    ((hugs)) I'm sorry. That was nice for the home to inclcandace candle with their names. I have a necklace with Felix's name that I wear everyday. I love having him close to me.

    The ocean sounds like a wonderful place for your boys. 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • ehlersmehlersm member

    That is such a hard thing to do, I'm so sorry. I love the idea of putting the ashes in the ocean on Father's Day- I know your boys will love that.

    The candle sounds very special as well. I have a necklace that I have with the boys initials engraved on it. I wear it all the time and it makes my feel closer to my boys. 

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Report Reply
  • Petunia844Petunia844 member
    I'm so sorry, I remember that day.  Don''t be surprised if spreading the ashes is harder than you think it may be.  DH and I decided to spread Peyton's ashes in the protected mountain/lake behind our house, so he's always near by but he's out in nature playing with the ducks.  The spot was beautiful and I feel so peaceful when I go...but spreading his ashes was really hard for me.  DH went first and then when he gave me the little bag to do some I shook my head and started bawling.... I'm glad that DH insisted.  I couldn't really bring myself to "spread" them though, I crouched down and it took everything  I had in me to pour them out in one little spot.  I'm glad I did it though.... I just wanted to warn you it will be impossibly hard.  Just remember you aren't saying goodbye to them anymore than you already have.  They will ALWAYS live in your heart.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    CafeMom Tickers

    Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

    My Blog

    Report Reply
  • roxyttandmeroxyttandme member
    I an remember that day, and it was a really tough one. (((hugs))) it just isn't fair! 
    Report Reply
  • CaroleeCarolee member
    Sending huge (((HUGS)))
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
    Report Reply
  • weddedwifeweddedwife member

    The day we picked up Nathaniel's ashes was AWFUL. Just as bad as leaving the hospital without him. I just bawled and bawled.

     That was a nice gesture from the funeral home. Big hugs to you mama, this is so hard.

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • jbranden12jbranden12 member
    ((hugs)) It is a harsh reality. That was thoughtful of the funeral home to give you the candle.


      Our Angel Patricia born sleeping 3/30/12 at 31 weeks
    Our Fighter Anna born early 1/8/13 at 26 weeks
    Hoping to bring home #3 due 9/9/15
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"