Does this seem weird to you?

Sunflower7777

I've been letting DS (he's 6) play outside alone in our front yard after dinner. (We live in a dead-end sub of about 26 houses.) I peek on him through the window every few minutes. Last night he was out front throwing a ball up in the air and hitting it with his bat. When I went to check on him, there was a woman I didn't know pitching the ball to him. 

I went out and asked her who she was and if she lived in the neighborhood. She said yes, she lived on the cul-de-sac at the front of the neighborhood and was just out for a walk when she saw DS playing by himself and offered to pitch to him. 

I was weirded out by the whole thing because I've never met her and it seemed odd to me that she'd stop to play with a kid she doesn't know. (I'd estimate her to be about 40-45.) I did confirm that she and her husband have been renting a house in our neighborhood for about 2 years.

My gut is telling me it was probably an innocent thing, but it was a good reminder to teach DS about stranger danger. WDYT?  

ppants

I do think it's odd, but most likely an innocent encounter. I would instruct DC that if someone they don't know, even a child, asks them to play or starts playing with them that they should say, "I'm going to check with my mom.". Or "I need to let my parents know."

littlemermaid

Definitely remind your child about strangers.  See how quickly it was for someone to approach your child in the few minutes that you weren't watching him.   So it's very important that your child knows to never interact with a stranger unless they are with you and that he should immediately come get you.

karlahi

I'm sorry but I'd freak too! I mean she was actually in your garden?? Never bothered to knock on the door?? mmmmm 

Ms5586

mrs_sexy:

I do think it's odd, but most likely an innocent encounter. I would instruct DC that if someone they don't know, even a child, asks them to play or starts playing with them that they should say, "I'm going to check with my mom.". Or "I need to let my parents know."

I think that's a good idea to teach them.  I agree, it's a little odd, but more than likely innocent.

MrsSR

To be honest, I would have stopped too.  I'm a teacher and get really worried when I see little kids outside alone.

I would have at least stopped to keep an eye on him until someone came out.

marigolds

MrsSR:

To be honest, I would have stopped too.  I'm a teacher and get really worried when I see little kids outside alone.

I would have at least stopped to keep an eye on him until someone came out.

 

I'm not a teacher, but I would have stopped until someone came out too.

cnybride2be

I see this whole thing happening as a message to you (and me).  A stranger approached, offered to play, and he accepted.  Sounds like it was all on the up and up and for that I am sure you feel very blessed- that it was a safe stranger.  But there would be no play on his own for the 6 year old in the front yard again unless I was sitting out with him.

 

and I do not want to come off as judgey at all because I have let my 7 year old do the same thing and I'm not so sure he wouldn't have loved the attention from an unknown female and accepted too.  (he loves a pretty girl at any age)

 

and then I think how absolutely fast he could be grabbed and put in a car from that part of the yard.  

so it really is such a blessing that she stopped and reminded you (and ashamedly me) how fast their attention can be taken, and sometimes not just their attention.

I wouldn't even question the part about her stopping by as being weird, sure maybe it was.  but she just may have had a point in it all. 

EXL311

I don't think it's necessarily weird.  If I saw a child that age by themselves I would be concerned and want to make sure someone was watching him.  Not to judge but I would never let my 5 or 7 year old play outside by themselves.  If she did have bad intentions she could have taken off with him easily in between the times you were checking on him.  Do you have a fenced backyard that might be safer for him? 

pookie2005

marigolds:

MrsSR:

To be honest, I would have stopped too.  I'm a teacher and get really worried when I see little kids outside alone.

I would have at least stopped to keep an eye on him until someone came out.

 

I'm not a teacher, but I would have stopped until someone came out too.

This. Maybe it's just me but 6 seems too young to play outside alone. This incident is a good reason why. 

stemms8810

Yes, I do think that was weird.  But, I would be weary of letting my six year old play outside all by himself.  My DD is 5 1/2 and I never let her play outside unless me or my DH can sit outside and watch her.  I don't trust anyone to not drive by, see my child by herself, and try to take her away.  Some people may think I am paranoid but around here it would be too much of a risk.  Even when she turns six in 6 months, I still don't think I would let her outside by herself unless we had a fenced in backyard or something.

Littlejen22

Weird yes, very weird that someone that age would stop and play with your kid without letting you know, creepy. If she was 75 I would think innocent but what 50-something does not realize that can wind up with a call to the cops?  And yeah, he is not ready to play out front alone if he would play with a stranger. And dead end or not I think 6 is too young for alone in the front, I never understood why check every few minutes, if she took him you might not have seen. 

Ilumine

God, I remember being 6 and having the run of my neighborhood....

With that, it is time to discuss stranger danger and stop letting him be outside alone if you don't want others to interact with him without your consent.  

rebs

Ilumine:

God, I remember being 6 and having the run of my neighborhood....

With that, it is time to discuss stranger danger and stop letting him be outside alone if you don't want others to interact with him without your consent.  

Well colour me a terrible mother- I let my 7 year old head out by himself around the neighborhood all the time. He goes to his friends houses and they play in different front and backyards- run all over the place. He know the boundries of where he is allowed to go. Sometimes if no one is around to play with he will play by himself in the front yard. 

What is worrying you about this encounter? She didn't attempt to take your son from the yard. If you are worried he go off with a stranger, then by all means have that conversation.

Ilumine

rebs:

Ilumine:

God, I remember being 6 and having the run of my neighborhood....

With that, it is time to discuss stranger danger and stop letting him be outside alone if you don't want others to interact with him without your consent.  

Well colour me a terrible mother- I let my 7 year old head out by himself around the neighborhood all the time. He goes to his friends houses and they play in different front and backyards- run all over the place. He know the boundries of where he is allowed to go. Sometimes if no one is around to play with he will play by himself in the front yard. 

What is worrying you about this encounter? She didn't attempt to take your son from the yard. If you are worried he go off with a stranger, then by all means have that conversation.

UHM...I did not say that I thought that letting a 6 yo outside by his/herself was wrong, I said that  SHE should stop letting him outside by himself if SHE didn't want others to ineteract with him without her consent. 

beachgirl1977

I think 6 is way too young to play outside alone. If you didn't see the woman come up, think how easily you could have missed him wandering off, getting hurt, or being grabbed. Playing outside in a fenced in yard is different than playing in the front yard alone.

AimeeL85

Ilumine:

rebs:

Ilumine:

God, I remember being 6 and having the run of my neighborhood....

With that, it is time to discuss stranger danger and stop letting him be outside alone if you don't want others to interact with him without your consent.  

Well colour me a terrible mother- I let my 7 year old head out by himself around the neighborhood all the time. He goes to his friends houses and they play in different front and backyards- run all over the place. He know the boundries of where he is allowed to go. Sometimes if no one is around to play with he will play by himself in the front yard. 

What is worrying you about this encounter? She didn't attempt to take your son from the yard. If you are worried he go off with a stranger, then by all means have that conversation.

UHM...I did not say that I thought that letting a 6 yo outside by his/herself was wrong, I said that  SHE should stop letting him outside by himself if SHE didn't want others to ineteract with him without her consent. 

I think she was just building on what you said rather than disagreeing with the idea of it. Don't know for sure, but that's how I read it.

I remember having the run of the neighborhood (well, our block, where there were lots of kids) when I was that young. It's some of my best memories and it makes me sad that I don't know if I'll ever trust people enough to let my kids loose. 

MarSamWhitney

It sounds like the woman was just being nice and maybe felt bad he was playing by himself. I agree with pp's, time to talk to him more about strangers.

hmp1

I went back and forth to my friend's houses at 6 and played on our street too.  We live on a quiet cul-de-sac and I always see our 4 year old neighbor riding his bike or playing in the driveway. We don't have a fenced back yard and I see myself letting DS play outside with me checking on him from inside when he is 6. 

I do agree with having the stranger talk more often so he can remember what to do in that situation.