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Minnesota Babies
Do I stay or do I go?
I'm up at 5 am because I think I made the wrong choice in a day care for my daughter. The first day seemed fine. The second day, I walked in and the teacher was alone with 8 babies because the other staff "went to the bathroom" for about 15 minutes. The Director has assured me that this never happens, that she has disciplined all involved, etc....but I'm not feeling comforted by that.
I'm also concerned that there are 12 babies in one room...is that typical? Seems like a lot to me.
I am struggling with whether I should switch day cares or not... Maybe I just will never trust anyone! Part of me thinks it's a no brainer, but the other part of me is thinking I should give them a chance. They are accredited, I have friends who love the place, I really do like the Director. I don't know.... I guess anyone's perspective, advice, experience would be helpful. I have to figure this out. I can't keep searching the internet for day cares at 3 am! TIA.
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Re: Do I stay or do I go?
I think it's reasonable to allow a staff member to use the bathroom, whether 15 minutes is needed or not is a personal question I wouldn't ask. When I worked at a preschool if the teachers needed to use the bathroom outside of their usual break time we just used common sense and didn't go if the kids were melting down, for example.
However, if you don't feel comfortable with that situation I would probably start looking elsewhere. Yes leaving your child at daycare gets a little easier as time goes on, but I would be a mess everyday if I didn't think my son was safe where he is. It's hard to trust your child with (essentially) a stranger, and this situation wouldn't be a deal breaker for me if I otherwise was happy with the care, but you need to trust you gut.
Is this a daycare center? How old is your daughter? 12 babies in one room with 2 adults seems like too many to me. I know at my daycare, they can only have 4 infants to one adult and 7 toddlers to one adult, and I know that is the rule statewide. I found this from searching on google:
https://www.mnchildcare.org/pdfs/ccrr_ratio.pdf
I would definitely feel uncomfortable about the situation you described, and I'd be looking for a new place ASAP! Good luck!
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Also, check out this link:
https://www.mnchildcare.org/families/terms.php
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I definitely feel for you. My first child is due in 2 weeks, and picking a day care has been an emotional roller coaster for me. We originally picked one that had a very long wait list (meaning the infant capacity is always maxed out), and had a nice facility with cameras in each room you can view from a screen in the lobby. Last spring, we stopped in for a surprise visit, and found a scenario similar to yours in the infant room, which made us both feel uneasy. The one staffer who was in the room was feeding two babies lying on the floor and was therefore unable to attend to another baby who was crying until the other staff member returned. At the time, the camera system was broken and they said they were in the process of replacing it. We also visited a preschool room that had a bunch of kids crowded around two computers, and the teacher said they loved them and spent "all day" on the computers.
After that experience, we decided to stop by for a surprise visit at each of the other two runner-up centers, and decided to switch to one that is much smaller and privately owned. We had a really good impression of the primary teacher in the infant room; she seemed engaged with the babies, and hasn't seemed overwhelmed any of the times we stopped in to visit. They have a max capacity of 8 babies, but seem to trend at 4-6. The lady who runs the center has two children of her own in the program, and infant and a preschooler. It's a little more expensive than the other "chain" places (though still ballpark), but seems well worth it for the increased peace of mind.
I can't yet speak as a BTDT mom, and of course I still don't know for sure how our new place will pan out. But I think day care is one of those things where it makes sense to go with your gut feeling. If you just started, it might make sense to give it another week or two to see if things work out, or your feelings become clarified one way or another. Those of us using day care have to accept that our baby will be one of 3 or 4 cared for by a single staff member, and won't get the level of attention we would ideally like. But I still think there may be places that handle the ratio better than others.
Good luck!
You are up at 5am worrying about this for a reason.
Listen to your gut.
Also, daycare is expensive, but I've learned that you get what you pay for.
I'm pretty sure that while bathroom breaks are certainly allowed, the teacher still needs to have someone else come in the room while they go to the bathroom. 8 infants for 1 teacher is not ok in my book.
12 babies in one room is fine as long as that is what they are licensed for (and they have atleast 3 teachers in there - 4:1 ratio)
I think you have absolutely every right to be upset. It's not acceptable. How long have those teachers been employed there? I'm glad to hear the director "disciplined" those involved - whatever that means.
If it were me, I would probably end up looking at other daycare options so I know what's available if I do feel the need to bail on the current place. And then I would probably talk to every single one of my friends who love the place and get their opinions on the matter. If they're shocked to hear it happened, then I'd be more inclined to think it probably really was a fluke. But if they don't seem overly surprised or concerned, then I'd be more likely to find something else. But that's just me. I need to be reassured my daughter is their priority. I'm like you - I'll keep worrying until I feel comfortable.
Good luck!! Let us know what you decide to do!