SD is coming over tonight for his first visit. I'm not looking forward to it. All I see when I look at him is someone who is trying to take my child away. And, I can't get past it. I'm so angry with him. I honestly think I'll never get over it. I might be able to move past it eventually, but I'll never fully get over the things he's said and done. Even now, all the while trying to convince me to be friends, he kept calling crazy and sayin I made it all up, even as he claims to have talked to lawyers who say he can get custody. I know he can't...I do...but it scares the crap out of me.
The biggest mistake of my life resulted in one of the two greatest things to have happened to me. I just wish I didn't have to deal with him and his threats and lies and dellusions. I want so bad to take my babies and run to the safety of another city...state...country. But, that isn't the right move unless some great job lands in my lap.