Book- Journal of Best Practices

nomadica

Anyone read this book? It's about a man with AS (diagnosed as an adult) who attempts to change some of his ways to improve his marriage, which is failing. It's a really interesting read and pretty funny. For me, eye-opening, as well. I know many on this board have realized through their DC's diagnosis that their partner is also somewhere on the spectrum. I think a part of me knew that but I didn't really acknowledge that to myself until I read this. So for me, it was somewhat mind-blowing.

nomadica

-auntie-:

I enjoyed it. I like John Elder Robison's books on the subject as well.

Thanks for the recommendations- I immediately reserved those through my library.

Auntie, I'm particularly curious about your thoughts on David Finch's attempts to make changes in his book. In your opinion, how much success can he have? Are significant, lasting changes possible? This is personally relevant to me since so many of the difficulties he discussed are apparent in my own marriage.

pastalady

Yes! I enjoyed it! My Dh has AS and DD is going through initial evals and diagnosis still. 

I also recommend a book called "In love with Mr. Spock" (not 100% sure of the title I got it from the library awhile ago).

After we got DH's diagnosis and started evals for DD the therapist hugged me and said she felt so bad for me to have both a child and partner on the spectrum. I thought that was alittle weird. I mean yes there are challenges but I am happy DD has someone to go through this with who will understand more than I can. 

pastalady

Just wanted to add that for Dh and I yes there are changes he can make but we cannot change who he is. He will never be comfortable in certain situations but he can try. We both compromise. 

I will say since his diagnosis and the awareness of it our marriage has improved. I am in a support group for AS partners that helps me.  

nomadica

Thanks to both of you! That is encouraging to hear.