Single Parents

BD rant... (sorry, long)

I rarely post, but do lurk and need to vent a little...

DS's father text me asking if we could talk.  I was suspicious (because I has maybe spoken to him 3-4 times in the past yr), but said sure.

He calls, gets the "niceties" out of the way and then starts mentioning how he would like to spend some time with DS this summer.  I said he was more than welcome to come visit.  He then says he wants DS to come visit him for 2 weeks or more.  I was speechless.  DS is 6 yrs old.  He met BD once, just after he turned 2 yrs old, and it was because I went there, rather than him coming to us.  DS has no idea who he is, and considering BD's utter lack of involvement over the last 6 yrs, I feel no desire to change that.

BD then starts in on how he feels, after all the child support he's paid, that I owe it to him, to send DS with him, and he expects me to pay for transportation costs to get him to/from BD's.  All this after never once sending a bday or xmas card/gift or being involved in his life in any way, shape, or form.  

I was so pissed, at this point, I just kept my mouth shut to keep from yelling and screaming at him.

I calmed down enough to inform him that even if it was with someone DS knew (like Papa and Nana), I wouldn't be comfortable with a 2 wk + stay, due to his food allergy.  I don't trust anyone to have him for an extended period of time and be able to consistently provide him with food he can eat (except my mom).  

Then I mentioned that if he honestly wanted to spend time with him, it wouldn't matter that he had to come to us.  He sort of poo-pooed that idea, saying he couldn't afford to.  To which I then responded with, "so, think having him there will be free?  You would have to buy expensive, specialty foods and make separate meals just to feed him and what did you plan to do with him while you're at work?"  He said he was just going to have his girlfriend watch him and he didn't have any idea about the food restrictions.  Gee...maybe that's because you haven't cared enough to be involved...

He could tell I was getting more pissed by the second and said to just forget about the visit and maybe he would see about doing a weekend trip to us.  Then he quickly said his goodbye's and hung up.

It took me quite awhile to calm down and I was glad that DS was at school, when I talked to his BD.  There are just soooo many things he said that angered me and I was glad DS wasn't home to witness it. 

Well, okay...I guess my rant is over.  Thanks. 

IAmPregnant Ticker Support with Integrity
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