Intro... and LOTS questions? :)

amywalt1684

Hello ladies!

I am happily married with a 9 month old DD and just got a BIG surprise BFP this morning! I am excited but logistically I'm unsure how we are going to do a few things.

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right?

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it?

3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this?

4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us?

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins?

Whew... TIA!

MammaBear81

First of all Congrats!

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right? We kept the LO in a bassinet in our room for 4-5 months and then moved the older one to a toddler bed.  It works for some people, not for others, its really up to your child's temperament and your parenting style.

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it?  See #1 for the first 5 months, by the time they moved into the same room LO was waking was only 1-2 times per night, and we used a sounds machine to drown out the crying (we always had sound machines to help the kids sleep).  My kids never woke up before I got to the crying LO.

3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this? I've always stopped nursing by 1, but there are several tandem nursing mamas on this board.

4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us? It depends on your situation, technically nursing can cause contractions, and send you into early labor, BUT I don't think it's a major problem with healthy pregnant mama's (but don't quote me on that one!)

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins?  I don't think you need to do anything else, a few extra calories and water should be good.

amywalt1684

Thank you for your response! I just need to chill out... looks you got this kind of thing under control! I can totally do this! Haha...

LollyBug18

I am happily married with a 9 month old DD and just got a BIG surprise BFP this morning! I am excited but logistically I'm unsure how we are going to do a few things. Me too! Pretty much all of it, except three months ago!

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right? I think we're going to try to get away w/o getting another crib and maybe see how DD does with a twin mattress on the floor a couple months before #2 comes. We'll see though...

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it? No real advice here except pray that it continues! And I have a feeling we'll manage it somehow like we did the first time around. Thankfully it's nothing that will last forever, every thing is a "stage", you know?

3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this?

4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us?

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins?

I'll answer 3/4/5 all together. When I got my BFP, my OB said I'd have to wean soon but that was only because she assumed my milk would dry up fast. I was determined to prove her wrong and when I was still nursing at my first prenatal appt., she was glad for me and said "more power to you!" and just reminded me that I'd need lots of rest because not only was I growing a baby, I was still feeding one too. First tri exhaustion was absolutely KILLER for me and I did decide to start weaning DD earlier than planned. By then she was down to 4 sessions a day so I replaced one with a bottle of formula (my pedi said no cow milk till 1 year and I wanted to respect that, others chose WCM anyway, what ever works for you). Then I was able cut out her mid-day session and get her bottle to line up with lunch. That helped my exhaustion immensely. Last week I dropped the morning session and she started getting WCM and we're still nursing once at night after dinner. She'll be 18 months when #2 comes and I'd like a few months between w/o nursing just for a little break and in hopes that she doesn't become interested again when I start BFing again. No idea if that will work though! Many, many women nurse while pregnant and, assuming your low risk and problem free, you should be able to continue as long as you want. Definitely make sure you're drinking LOTS and LOTS of water, eating when you're hungry and getting plenty of rest. One the best pieces of advice I was given was from our pediatrician, she said to just relax about it all and enjoy that special time with my daughter before it's over and there's a new baby. GL! And welcome!

celiabwatson

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right? Ours are a little farther apart than yours but we successfully transitioned my son to a toddler bed at 18 months and he's done fine with it. Other people do a regular mattress on the floor to skip the expense of the toddler bed. It depends on your child. You can also (like PP said) wait and decide after the baby is born and keep the baby in a bassinet or something until you're rey to transition or buy a 2nd crib.2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it? My older one is still not STTN. Amazingly my daughter is already STTN so you might get lucky. If both kids were awake at the same time my husband would get up as well. He usually rocked the baby while I put the toddler back to sleep since the toddler at least would go back to sleep pretty quickly. If they weren't up at the same time I just took care of the one that was up, went back to bed and was immediately woken by the other. It sucks but you get through it. Also, my kids share a room and don't wake up when the other cries so them being up at the same time was actually pretty rare.3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this? I am tandem nursing my two so I don't have experience with weaning and then having a baby, but I do have a few friends who weaned a few months before and the toddler didn't go back to nursing. In one case the toddler asked to try and the mom let her but she didn't really remember how and that was the end of that. So I think if you want to wean before baby is born you can and it should work just fine. 4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us? My midwives were fine with it. I think if your Dr is against it then it's up to you if you want to switch or just stay strong. It really is a personal choice.5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins? Yes, lots of water and calories but just listen to your body. Your body will feed baby first, then nursing toddler and then yourself, so if you feel hungry you need more food, but it doesn't mean your baby is starving or anything. My daughter (who spent her whole gestation with me nursing her brother) was a healthy 9 lb baby. I also am terrible about taking prenatals so I wouldn't worry too much there.

amywalt1684

Thank you SO much everyone! You have really made me feel more comfotable about this! We can totally do this!

I have already noticed that I am WAY more thirsty than I ever was with my first pregnancy, guess my body is doing a good job at letting me know what I need!

barnwife

amywalt1684:

Congrats on the BFP!
1. We never have used a crib. We bedshare. Around 12 months we started having J. sleep in a floor bed in his room. By 18 months he was in the floor bed full time.
2. Yes, sometimes they are both up in the middle of the night. (J. is a much better sleeper than he used to be, so this is rare now.) As I EBF, I take care of all night feedings/wakings for DD. On the rare occasions when DS wakes, DH goes to him. And DH pretty much always gets up with DS as DS is an early riser. We figure DH gets interrupted less during the night, so he gets to be the one getting up earlier.

3 and 4 are related so...J. still nurses a couple times a day (usually just upon waking). He never was bothered by a change in taste or supply while I was pregnant. My midwife (per what research shows) is completely supportive of moms BF while pregnant. It's really only a concern if you are at risk for pre-term labor. As for how to deal with a medical professional who doesn't support this, I would just let the dr. know you will continue to BF.

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? Yes to the water and few extra calories...no to extra prenatals.

PaisleyRuth

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right?

Mine will be 18.5 months apart and we already moved DS to a big bed at 15 months.  I was nervous about doing it so early and didn't want to ruin what a good sleeper he has always been, but I'm also too cheap to buy a second crib and am not about to keep the baby in our room for weeks or months.  So, we decided to go ahead & try & it has worked so far.  I'm sure every LO is different, but it CAN work! 

ETA: The "big bed" we moved DS to is the queen size bed that was already in our guest room.  I took it off the frame, so mattress & box springs are on the floor.  I have it in a corner (so against 2 walls) and have railings on the other 2 sides.  I put pillows up in the gaps just to give him a visual barrier against getting out, but he's figured out how to get out now so I usually hear him banging around in his room once he wakes up.  Luckily, for the most part, he doesn't get up when I'm trying to put him down - only when he's woken up in the morning or after his nap. 

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it?

DS never wakes up at night currently, but I'm a little nervous about whether he will when there is a crying baby next door.  He does have a noise machine that drowns out a lot, so I'm just praying that does the trick. 

I can't answer for any of your other questions since I had stopped BFing DS right before I got pregnant.

EMOmamma

We kept #1 in his crib.  He is not ready for a toddler bed yet & even when he is we will use his crib to convert.  We just got a second crib for #2 although she will be in our room w/ us for a while (2-4 months I assume).  If your #2 is going to be in with you, you could always wait to make the crib decision until you see where your DD is at at that time.

celiabwatson

I forgot to share my experience with BF and pre-term labor. I was "at risk" for pre-term labor because my first was born at 36 weeks. I did have more braxton hicks while breastfeeding but my #2 was born on her due date. The midwives did stay to stop breastfeeding (like end the session, not wean) if the contractions got too strong and make sure they subsided and then we could resume.

amywalt1684

Thanks ladies! I find it very interesting that none of you had issues with your OBs/Mid-wives giving you are hard time with BF and pregnancy. Maybe I had heard this once and just assumed this is how it would go. Maybe I should assume my OB will be supportive and take it as it comes!

sometimesalwayschaotic

amywalt1684:

Hello ladies!

I am happily married with a 9 month old DD and just got a BIG surprise BFP this morning! I am excited but logistically I'm unsure how we are going to do a few things.

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right?WE got an additional crib.  I figure it's best to have DD1 contained as long as possible.  Sometimes I put her in the crib when I pump if she is being ornery and pulling at my pumping stuff.  It's nice to have the option!

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it? DD1 started sleeping through the night at 11 months.  We have not had issues with them both waking up.  I think she has needed attention 1 or 2 times at night so it's not been bad at all.

3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this?I nursed my LO until 13 months and then had DD2 when DD1 was 15 months.  We had zero jealousy issues.  I allowed DD1 to self wean.

4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us? My midwive had no issues with me continuing to nurse.  The research shows it's fine if you are low risk.

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins?You need a lot more water, calories and calcium.  GL!!

Whew... TIA!

++southerngirl++

Mine are 14 month apart -I realize that's different than 18 months - but we got a separate crib for DD. We decided to buy both of them nice stuff that can grow w them. We converted DS crib to a toddler bed right after his 2nd bday and then it will go to a double bed. DDs crib converts, too. I was adamant that both kids start sleeping in their own beds at 6 weeks! Both of them STTN at 10-11 weeks.

We did go through a period where they were both teething and waking at different times all night. They would wake each other up-- ugh. It was horrible!! Anyway, I had a Rainbow air purifier that I put in DD room - I used it like a sound machine - and that did the trick! 

I can't comment on the BF bc we did formula. GL and congratulations! You will love having 2 under 2!!

 

Monsieur_et_Madame_Ha

Why hello there

To answer your questions... 

1. DD will be around 18 months when the new LO arrives, what did you all do about cribs? I am assuming DD will still need one by then, right? DD1 was about that age (18 months) when we took her out of her crib. I would have loved to keep her in there longer but she just decided she was over it (read: she would suddenly refuse to go to sleep, screaming, back-arching, you name it - and when we did CIO, she started crib diving - fun times). But from what I gather, a lot (most?) kids still use their crib at that age. Maybe get a crib that converts into a toddler bed and have your DD use it? Also, keep in mind you might not need the crib right away if you keep the baby in a bassinet in your room for the first few months.

2. DD JUST started STTN and now I am terrified that I will have 2 LOs up in the middle of the night. Does this happen to you? How do you manage it?  We live in a 2-bed condo, so room sharing was our only option. It is working out better than I expected and the girls hardly ever wake each other up. We do, however, have the PnP set up in the living room so if one of the girls is having a really rough night, DD2 can sleep there.

3. DD is still getting breastmilk and I had planned to BF her at least until her first birthday and slowing begin to wean. Do you all think it is a good idea to completely wean her and then a few months later I will be BFing the new LO? Don't you think she is going to want to nurse too? Any experience with this? I weaned DD1 when I was 3 months pregnant with DD2. The first few weeks, she would sometimes try to nurse, but I'd say she was over it after a month or two. So no, I would not worry about your DD wanting to nurse again. If she's anything like mine, though, she might be VERY intrigued by this whole nursing business when the baby gets here

4. Like I previously stated I would like to continue to BF my DD for a little while longer and I have heard that many doctors will advise against this. How do I handle that? Just stay strong and continue to do what I think is best for us? My doctor never advised me against BFing while pregnant, so I don't know...

5. Since I am now preggo and BFing is there anything more I need to do in terms of my diet and prenatals? LOTS of water, few extra calories, what about additional prenatal vitamins?  I can't think of anything else. Sounds to me like you've got it all covered