Dads & Dads-to-be

Important things that never get recommended?

Hey guys, I'm going to be a new dad hopefully here in July. 

 

My wife has all kinds of crap and lists filled with other crap.

 

What are some things that we forget about that, as guys, we will need or want?

 

Are there specific products or gizmos that come in handy but you never even thought about before the baby came along?

 

Hopefully this sub forum will be a haven for us dudes. Hopefully there is some sort of force field under construction to keep the estrogen fueled lunatics out of here ;) 

"I keep an inch and a half guardrail nut on a loop of 550 cord. It's not whiz-bang tactical, but one smack in the grape and it's coloring books for Christmas time."

Re: Important things that never get recommended?

  • This is all you need Breast milk /Formula, Diapers/Cloth Diapers and wipes.

    Everything else is just for the wife ;-)

  • Sorry dude...no force field. It's not our fault that you didn't take the chance to invade the other boards. There will never be a safe haven as long as women are alive. We eventually take over just about everything. Again deeply sorry. But not really. I


    This would seem so basic but ridiculous amounts of disposable bags for dirty clothes when the babies have exploding diapers in public. We would always carry extra clothes but forget a bag to bring the dirty clothes back home in. 

     

    Not a man input but tried to ask my husband his take on this but he had nothing. 

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  • Depending on your personality, a daddy diaper bag? My DH hates whenever he has to take LO out alone and he has to carry a bag that is very feminine looking.
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  • My Husband said the best thing I ever got was an app on my iphone.  It was free and it's called "Bright Start Baby"  It's just black and white pics that flash across the screen and if you touch the screen stars appear.  It's been a lifesaver a few times.  We turn it on and give it to our LO and she settles right down.
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  • Yoga ball to bounce a screaming baby!! It is something dad can help with too. My DH used it countless number of times when I needed a break from the comfort nursing.
  • Poor guys! We don't give them any space.  
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  • my little one will fall asleep (at least calm down) if hellogoodbye or taylor swift is on. so i normally keep those to cds in the radio and just hit play when she gets really fussy and nothing else works. 

    something that you wont know til little one is here but once you find out what their favorite band is, just keep that music with you always! 

     also, when youre at the hospital and say feel free to take whatever you need. DO IT .  its the small stuff like the burp rags and some of the harder small blue 'pads' that come in handy. and the diapers! 

  • Get a bottle warmer.  My husband loves this thing. Thinking back to trying to warm bottles with our first, I don't know how we managed with a screaming baby and waiting for a bottle to warm in a bowl full of hot tap water.  The bottle warmer heats up a bottle in about two minutes and gets the temperature right every time.  It reduced some of the frustration my husband felt about not being able to produce perfect-temperature milk instantly like his breast-feeding wife.

    I second the suggestion of getting a guy-friendly diaper bag.  We got a very generic backpack-style one from Land's End.  In hindsight, I would have skipped the official diaper bag and used a regular backpack (since we already own a couple) and bought a changing pad seperately.  There's really nothing special a diaper bag other than it has lots of compartments and comes with a changing pad.  There's no reason to spend $150 on a diaper bag. 

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  • only unlurking for a minute. Get an extra diaper bag! One you like! I coach high school footba and will use my football bag (its actually a diaper bag i started using because I can hose it off), by DH still thinks its too girly-its a basic taxi style print. You need to feel comfortable with LO. And lets face it, if you have your own bag then noone can blame each other for things being missing from their bag.

    Two bags, Two sets of supplied, DON'T TOUCH EACH OTHERS BAG. And there will be one less thing to fight about during those sleep deprived times. 

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  • ditto yoga ball (actually 2 if you & SO don't use the same size like at my house) and diaper bag that looks like a regular guy backpack. (or maybe just a backpack you already own that becomes a diaper bag...)

    MH hated writing down what time they ate & pooped & stuff in the beginning (tho we were tracking two of them which complicates matters) and would always forget and we still tracked eating (not diapers anymore) after a couple weeks since we'd always forget so we got one of those itzbeen timers b/c it was easier to just push a button, throw it in a bag or pocket if you were on the go, etc. But also weight & feeding was a big concern for us early on also b/c of them being smaller when born... 

    Make sure you think your glider is comfortable too...I made MH come with me & sit in a whole bunch so he would like it too. 

    Lots of coffee or your caffeinated beverage of choice.

     

  • My daughter is about to turn one so here's what I 'needed'

    There's patience - you can never go wrong there. Other than that - just remember that you can satisfy your childs wants/needs by loving them and paying attention to them. You will instinctively know what they 'need.' At such an early age they only need love and attention - once they start getting bigger and getting their own personality is when you may 'need' something.

    But don't ever stress about 'Aimee's baby has ____ stroller and our kid doesn't.' Who cares?!?!?! They are 0-6 months old they won't remember anyway. Having a kid is a costly adventure - save when/where you can. 

    And honestly 1/2 of the crap we received at our baby shower we haven't used. Not because we didn't want to but because we found with our daughter some things weren't needed.

  • imagemstroud23:

    only unlurking for a minute. Get an extra diaper bag! One you like! I coach high school footba and will use my football bag (its actually a diaper bag i started using because I can hose it off), by DH still thinks its too girly-its a basic taxi style print. You need to feel comfortable with LO. And lets face it, if you have your own bag then noone can blame each other for things being missing from their bag.

    Two bags, Two sets of supplied, DON'T TOUCH EACH OTHERS BAG. And there will be one less thing to fight about during those sleep deprived times. 

    Seriously, who fights about something so stupid? The diaper bag gets cleaned out and reapacked every time we get home. The essentials (diapers, wipes, formula, bottles) are always in there. Other things can be lived without. As for a "manly" dipaer bag, man up guys. If you're having a little girls you'll be carrying around pink girly stuff the rest of your life. My DH will cary around our pink and grey diaper bag even if I'm not with him. If we had boys instead of girls it would be blue instead.

    OP other than a book or two for dads, I don't think daddy needs anything different than mommy. Some of it depends on your baby. Our 1st didn't care for the swing the 2nd loves it. DH uses it when he can't get her to sleep any other way. We like the little arm and hammer dirty diaper bags for when we're out and about and have a stinky diaper to take care of. With our 1st DH didn't like clothes that went over her head because he had a hard time getting them on her. He prefered sleepers because he found them easier to work with. Now he's an pro and can handle anything. Just be patient and you'll figure it out!

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  • imageled2009:
    imagemstroud23:

    only unlurking for a minute. Get an extra diaper bag! One you like! I coach high school footba and will use my football bag (its actually a diaper bag i started using because I can hose it off), by DH still thinks its too girly-its a basic taxi style print. You need to feel comfortable with LO. And lets face it, if you have your own bag then noone can blame each other for things being missing from their bag.

    Two bags, Two sets of supplied, DON'T TOUCH EACH OTHERS BAG. And there will be one less thing to fight about during those sleep deprived times. 

    Seriously, who fights about something so stupid? The diaper bag gets cleaned out and reapacked every time we get home. The essentials (diapers, wipes, formula, bottles) are always in there. Other things can be lived without. As for a "manly" dipaer bag, man up guys. If you're having a little girls you'll be carrying around pink girly stuff the rest of your life. My DH will cary around our pink and grey diaper bag even if I'm not with him. If we had boys instead of girls it would be blue instead.

    OP other than a book or two for dads, I don't think daddy needs anything different than mommy. Some of it depends on your baby. Our 1st didn't care for the swing the 2nd loves it. DH uses it when he can't get her to sleep any other way. We like the little arm and hammer dirty diaper bags for when we're out and about and have a stinky diaper to take care of. With our 1st DH didn't like clothes that went over her head because he had a hard time getting them on her. He prefered sleepers because he found them easier to work with. Now he's an pro and can handle anything. Just be patient and you'll figure it out!

     

    I agree about the diaper bag. Who fights over stupid stuff when your sleep deprived?!

    At first we had a simple black diaper bag from a Used Kid store and my sister ended up getting us a nice regular bag monogramed with 'S' on it for our last name. Its a little girly but its black and white and I normally dont even carry the thing. 9 times outta 10 its under the stroller and I just pull out whatever I need. I have a little girl. I am expecting to have to touch pink and not get cooties when I do. Am im sure one day she will want to play dress up and do make up and whatever other girly things they do. I wanted to be a dad for a reason, to love my child and their things no matter what.  

  • my cousin got us a baby carrier. this one actually 

    https://www.target.com/p/infantino-flip-front-or-rear-facing-baby-carrier/-/A-12877112

     and I love carrying her in it. (The little blue thing on front just velcros off so its all black). The other day my wife wanted to look  at some shoes, and  baby was crying like we were torturing her. I was already wearing the carrier so I just went outside and just and walked around with her. She was happy! 

  • I don't know...

    I don't see why you wouldn't EACH have your own diaper bag.  The Wife and I each work. She works 9-5 ish and I work nights and weekends.  We each have our own car. So we each carry our own diaper bag.  Just like we have our own peronalities, we have our own diaper bags with what WE think is important. Plus it is super convenient for me to know that my bag is always in my truck so if I am out I will have it with me.  So if I am going to have my own bag, why not have one that I like?  Mine is pretty plain, but it is a blue and black nylon "manly" one.  I much prefer it over most all of the idiotic high priced designer (Thirty One, etc) ones I see most moms carrying.

     

    As far as things you need, I would suggest you buy LOTS of the cheapest plain white wash clothes as you can from Target or Wal-Mart or wherever.  They will come in super handy for almost anything.  They are great for cleaning up during diaper changes, burp rags, cleaning messes, making compresses, etc. And when Baby is a little older you will just use them as rags around the house. Buy a super cheap radio for the nursery and get a couple lullaby CDs. 

     

    Most important, get as much sleep as you can NOW. And when the baby is here, remember you sleep when the baby sleeps.

     

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