Hello- new here w/ some questions

bry238

Hi everyone!

So since I can't possibly read another online article about infertility, I decided to seek out some support from real people with real advice!

My husband and I have been married for almost 4 years and have been trying to conceive for about 2.  We finally decided to face the facts and undergo fertility testing.  When I saw my dr, he said that since I have such regular cycles and because fertility testing in women is a lot more invasive and expensive than men, to have my husband checked out first. So we did and the urologist did see some abnormalities and seemed concerned immediately. He is going for his first SA next week and has to get an ultrasound. I know that this doesn't by any means mean we even necessarily have a cause for concern yet, but I'm trying to prepare myself the best I can.

I guess my question is, since there are potential issues with my husband, should I take my dr's word for it and hold off on testing of my own? Or should I take a more proactive approach to ruling out any major concerns with my own health?

Dispite scowering the web and chatting with my dr, I'm really feeling very ill informed about the process of fertility treatments, how expensive/invasive they are, and about our next steps to take, so if anyone has any words of wisdom and/or resources they would like to share, they are very welcomed!  

Thanks in advance.

Killer Tomato

Hello, and welcome! Are you seeing a RE, your OB, or our regular doc?

I think it would be a good idea to get your tests done...even if you are dealing with MFI, your half of things can impact treatment options too. I would get your cd3 bloodwork and an HSG. (Definitely do NOT take meds like clomid until you are checked out.) You also might want to call your insurance and find out what they will or will not cover.

 

Durham1008

I would absolutely not hold off on your testing. Regular cycles does not equal no issues. Bloodwork and an HSG is not as big a deal as your doctor made it sound. Get a different doctor, preferably an RE. You shouldn't move forward with any treatments without knowing the results of all your testing.

LtlAngL

Welcome and I hope your stay here is short. Although your husband has to have this testing done, it doesn't mean that you don't have any issues. Wouldn't you hate to find out that he's ok, assume you're fine, and then find out 6 months later that you have something going on preventing you from conceiving? Many Ob/Gyn's are great at taking care of women while they're pregnant, but don't know how to get them pregnant, so after 2 years, you should move on to the RE. It seems like your gyno isn't comfortable with IF testing and treatment of abnormalities, and therefore is trying to discourage you from doing it. I also have a "perfect" 28 day cycle and ovulate on day #14 like I'm supposed to, but have issues anyway. 

I'm from NJ as well, and you may know this already, but we have the law here that companies with greater than 50 employees have to provide IF coverage (unless they're super religious,) and my company has fewer than 50 and still provides it (because my boss and his wife had issues, so they sprung for the good insurance.) Look into it either way.

Here's the Resolve.org website (sorry my Mac won't let me make it clicky): https://www.resolve.org/family-building-options/insurance_coverage/state-coverage.html#NewJersey

Let me know if you need anything else, since you're my NJ neighbor :-) 

 

amh612

LtlAngL:

Welcome and I hope your stay here is short. Although your husband has to have this testing done, it doesn't mean that you don't have any issues. Wouldn't you hate to find out that he's ok, assume you're fine, and then find out 6 months later that you have something going on preventing you from conceiving? Many Ob/Gyn's are great at taking care of women while they're pregnant, but don't know how to get them pregnant, so after 2 years, you should move on to the RE. It seems like your gyno isn't comfortable with IF testing and treatment of abnormalities, and therefore is trying to discourage you from doing it. I also have a "perfect" 28 day cycle and ovulate on day #14 like I'm supposed to, but have issues anyway. 

I'm from NJ as well, and you may know this already, but we have the law here that companies with greater than 50 employees have to provide IF coverage (unless they're super religious,) and my company has fewer than 50 and still provides it (because my boss and his wife had issues, so they sprung for the good insurance.) Look into it either way.

Here's the Resolve.org website (sorry my Mac won't let me make it clicky): https://www.resolve.org/family-building-options/insurance_coverage/state-coverage.html#NewJersey

Let me know if you need anything else, since you're my NJ neighbor :-) 

 

I agree with everything the PP's have said, but in reference to the bolded above, I am also from NJ and there is one caveat to the law.  Self-insured companies are exempt from providing IF coverage.  My H's company is self-insured (they use a major carrier for benefits admin only) and therefore we have minimal IF coverage.  I know we are lucky to have any at all, but we definitely do not benefit from living in a state with such amazing laws.  Just one other thing to check on when you look into insurance.  Good luck!

xladybassx

I wouldn't wait if you have the option of being tested now. You will probably need to get tested either way before your doctor can decide on a treatment. The best case scenario is you find out nothing is wrong and at least you can have peace of mind. If you do find out something is wrong it's better to know- that way your doctor can treat you correctly! Good luck, I hope everything turns out well for you!

Lightdrwr

I would definitely not hold off you your testing. It's better to have everything out of the way asap to know of any/all problems so you can go ahead with the treatment that will give you the best results in the shortest amount of time. I have pretty regular cycles for the most part and they would seem to be normal from the outside but from using a BBT and charting, I know that I ovulate late and my luteal phase is short, both problems potentially causing my infertility. One resource I found recently, after more than 3 years of trying, is Creating a Family. They have all kinds of great info but I particularly love their radio shows. You can listen online or download the podcasts and they cover just about everything you could imagine pertaining to both infertility treatments and adoption. Here's the link but sorry if it's not clicky. https://www.creatingafamily.org/radioshow.html 

Good luck! 

bry238

Thanks to everyone for the advice and information. I am definitely going to get my preliminary testing done. The more I think about it and hear your experiences, the more I realize how silly it is to wait. Thanks again! 

lesleyzeb

Hi and welcome to the board! You definitely need to get tested too, regardless of the outcome of your husband's test. My cycles are also completely regular, BBT charts/OPKs show I ovulate, yet we assume the problem is partially me since my husband's test was fine (the rest of the problem we figure is partially "us" as a couple). An RE won't know how to treat you guys without testing you too.  Good luck!