Please tell me I'm normal
shineineaiken
member
I thought I had by-passed the Baby Blues and any PPD because I was in a great mood post partum. But I started noticing little things after I stopped breastfeeding (5wks). Like getting frustrated and yelling at DH (over little things), I DESPISE my MIL, and I can't stand people asking me how my little one is. What do they want me to say? well, he eats, poops, and sleeps. I love staring at him and I would rather be playing with him than having this mudane conversation with you.
DH has been great with Asher, but I feel like I have to tell him how and when to do everything. I mean, can't he see that there are no more clean bottles because there are 15 dirty ones sitting around the house?!?
The MIL is a whole nother issue so we won't even go there.
I get stressed because the house is a mess, I constantly have to buy diapers, wipes or formula, and everything is so expensive. And I feel like I'm the only one who can do things "right". And now, I'm tearing up over everything, when he smiles, when he laughs, when a sappy song comes on, and I get jelous when other people hold him.
So, ladies and fellow moms, any advice on how to deal? Is this what PPD is like or is this just motherhood?
Re: Please tell me I'm normal
I hear you when it comes to feeling you are the only one who can do things the "right" way. I tell my DH how to do particular things and he does the total opposite, so I then feel I HAVE to do it in order to get it right. The big thing is our nightime routine, K is a terrible night sleeper, but getting a bit better. I have told him continually, never put her down crying and let her cry it out (which he did at 5 am because he was sick of hearing her cry for 10 min) or dont be chatty with her at 530 when she gets up or she will think it is time to get up, instead do what you can to soothe her and get her back down-not happening. I suppose I could have it worse, at least he is trying to help. However, Ive definitely had my meltdowns. I feel if I werent the one to say okay its bath time, bed time etc...that time just wouldnt come!
I do not find myself crying however unless Im sleep deprived. I thought that PPD had to do with hormone levels (could be wrong). If so, yours should be back to normal now. Maybe the stress etc is causing it?
I think a lot of what you described is very normal. My husband is wonderful, but lately I find myself so annoyed bc he just doesn't "get it" like I do. I am now making an effort to make sure I am not as rude as I have been.
I don't think it would hurt to ask your OB. I am pretty sure PPD can come on way after you deliver. Its always better to be proactive and catch things early if necessary. GL :-)
PPD does not have to be immediately after baby comes. It can show up a couple of months later. I dealt with anxiety and depression before and I am still on the look out for PPD. Frustration and feeling of weight of the world on you is a symptom. I doesn't hurt to talk to someone. The website below can give you the number of someone local you can talk to. It helped me a lot.
https://postpartum.net/About-PSI.aspx
You might just be having a flux in hormones but this might help figure that out https://postpartum.net/Get-the-Facts.aspx
It is definitely hard to learn to let things go as far as DH not getting it right. This is our 2nd, and he's a wonderful parent- often better than me. However, he will wait until I tell him that she needs a clean diaper or needs a bath or really anything. It's frustrating, but he's always been lazy around the house. As far as doing things, but doing them wrong- if it's not harmful, I think it's really important to let it go. Sometimes I make an excuse to go in another room so I don't say something. When we correct them, I imagine it makes them feel judged and/or inadequate. He does't diaper the way I do, or play with her the way I do, or swaddle her the way I do, but she's just fine anyway. DD1 is still breathing, so between the two of us, we got the important stuff right.
It's hard to adjust to this totally new life. I thought simply adding another child would be less of a change, but everything is still completely different than before. My standards for dishes and neatness have to be more relaxed. I don't answer the phone if I don't feel like it. I do my best to keep calm with DD1, but know that my patience isn't infinite, and I have another child to care for now. I can't spend an entire afternoon playing with her if she's in a good more, or dealing with her sh*t if she's not.
What you're describing sounds like normal adjustment to your new life with baby, but if you're feeling down most of the time talk to our doctor. PPD can set in at any point- even up to a year PP. Sometimes your hormone levels just need a little kick start to regulate. Good luck, and feel better.
Sounds normal! I follow a writers blog, and she wrote about her experience.
Here it is:
https://joannagoddard.blogspot.com/2012/02/motherhood-depression-and-weaning.html
Yea, my DH talks to him the whole time (and I have to remind him not to) then puts him back down in the RNP which is on my side of course and he's wide awake
so I feel ya there!
Thanks Ladies, I think just having encouragement helps and to know I'm not alone. I have been fine but I just started back to work and I think that just stresses me out in general. Plus, I felt better after having just written it all out and admitting to it
I'm going to follow up with hubby on the checklist tho, who knows, I may be crazier than I seem 
Thanks again for responding and supporting!