I'm sorry, odd(ish) ? -- 2nd tri m/c & need to deliver

smbd

I had a c/s w#2 and was hoping for a VBAC this time.

Sadly, things have changed & yesterday, when I had my level 2 u/s, we discovered that #3 had passed (was 18w2d yesterday, she measured 16+w, but it looked like she'd only passed very recently).

Now I need to deliver.  I don't know all the options, I was kinda in & out when talking to my OB yesterday, but I'm pretty sure she said my options were induction or being put under for a D&E.

I honestly can't remember which drugs/methods for induction/super early delivery are safe/good(?) if we decide to have another child & hope for a VBAC.
I've somehow lost all my google-abilities and can't touch the VBAC books I have w/o sobbing and scaring my girls, so I'm here, asking. 

I think my OB was recommending D&E b/c the muscle & scar tissue around my incision haven't fully stretched, but I might have misunderstood.
MH has very little recollection of the conversation w/ her at all, so he doesn't know if I heard her correctly or not.

tia. 

marypnix

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I may not be much help but when a close friend of mine lost her baby at 22 weeks she had a foley bulb induction but I don't know all the details. She did have previous sections. I remember her saying that was her best option at that time.

Again I am so sorry.

iris427

I am so sorry for your loss.  Generally, Foley bulb and low dose Pit inductions are considered safe for VBAC but I don't know if that changes when it is a second trimester delivery.  Best wishes to you.

cchill01

I'm very sorry for your loss.  I don't have any advice, other than to call the doctor and have her explain it to you again so you can make the right decision.  They are very used to repeating information after traumatic news.   Most people retain very little information when told under tense situations.

T&Ps

MAprincess

cchill01:

I'm very sorry for your loss.  I don't have any advice, other than to call the doctor and have her explain it to you again so you can make the right decision.  They are very used to repeating information after traumatic news.   Most people retain very little information when told under tense situations.

T&Ps

I agree with this.  I am so sorry for your loss.  I had a friend who had a second tri loss and she opted for the induction because she wanted to see and hold her baby.  I don't think this was an option with the surgical option where they put you under.  She was not a VBAC candidate, though, so I don't know if that changes anything.

I am sure the doctor expects to hear from you agin with many more questions before you make your decision.  T&Ps.

MAprincess

Also, I see there is a Loss board here (on the list to the left).  They might also be able to help you sort out your different options right now.  We are happy to help you here as much as you can, too, of course, but they might have more information on the actual delivery.

smbd

thank you all.

I'm actually headed into the office in about 45minutes so I'll be speaking with the OB again then.

 

I lurked a bit on the loss & the m/c / pregnancy loss boards early this morning (my fabulous neighbor decided 4am was the perfect time to crank the radio while he hooked up his boat ::eye roll::) and I was going to post there, but I felt like I'd probably get more responses regarding a more VBAC friendly procedure here than there.

margeincharge3

I don't have any advice but I am so sorry for your loss.

Harper'smom

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope that whatever option you are most comfortable with is what is available to you.

babyike

I am so incredibly sorry for your loss, and many many T&Ps to you.  PPs have given good advice, and hopefully you had a good meeting with your OB to go over your options.  (((HUGS)))

AB&TB

I am so so sorry for your loss.  My first pregnancy was a late m/c at 18wks 2 days as well.  I had the D&E because I thought that it would be less emotionally traumatic for DH & I.  My recovery went well & there was very little cramping & bleeding afterwards (similar to a normal period, but lighter & a little longer).

Good luck! I hope your physical recovery is swift no matter what method you choose.  Hugs.

akl0506

So, so sorry for your loss.  I think you can still try for a VBAC after a D&E.  I think I would go this route, personally.  But, call your OB and ask her to go over your options again. I am sure she will understand that you need some clarity.  T&P are w/ you and your family. 

smbd

again, thanks to everyone for the kind words & advice. I really wanted to be sure to come back & say thank you for taking the time to answer a question that isn't typically asked around here (at least I haven't seen it in all the time I've spent lurking/posting here).

consensus seems to be that I can do either & it'll still be safe to attempt a VBAC with a later pregnancy (should there be one). I'm scheduled on Monday & Tuesday for pre-op & the surgery, but my body is starting to realize what's going on so we're just waiting at this point.