Two Under 2
charshman
member
Tips for a newbie.
charshman
member
in Two Under 2
My son is 6 months and I am ttc. I wll be a sahm for sure until Aug 2013 and possibly longer if we can afford it. My babies will be about 16 months apart. Am I crazy for wanting to have 2 babies so close in age? Can you share any tips about how you moms get through the day?
Any tips about managing a house on one income would be great too.
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Re: Tips for a newbie.
Hmm...well I can't speak to the being crazy part yet since I've not yet been there but right now I get through the day by resting as much as possible. It's been very hard for me to be PG while SAH with DD. She's constantly on the move and getting into things so I try to keep the mess to one part of the house and make sure to take her nap times to at least put my feet up for a little bit. We weren't TTC this time so maybe it caught by surprise more than it should have but the 1st tri exhaustion was horrible. Most days I felt like a zombie! So, definitely rest as much as possible. On my better days, I've also tried to prepare freezer crockpot meals for the many days that I don't feel like cooking. It has saved us a LOT of money on take out. You just take a bag out of the freezer and dump it in the crock, maybe make a batch of rice or couscous, and then dinner is done! A real life-saver.
As for living on one income, that's basically all we've ever done. When I was working more it was so we could pay off debt faster and save more, now it's so we can live w/o my income. We don't have cable or any of those extras, DH is on a cell plan with his work, I'm on a family plan with my parents, we have a VERY tight grocery budget, I do cloth diapers and made DD's baby food when she was still on purees, I breastfed so we didn't have to buy formula, and we really just don't get many extras. I rarely go shopping for clothes and when I do, I try to go to the consignment shops first. We have never bought a new piece of furniture for our home, instead it's all been hand-me-downs offered to us or pieces we've found gently used. We don't have car payments because we either get our vehicles with cash or have a plan in place to pay it off w/in a year, buying used of course. Basically, it's been our goal from the very beginning of our marriage to live on as little as we can. And since we started out that way, we've never really felt deprived of anything. Who cares what other people have if they're up to their eye-balls in debt and aren't sure how they'll pay the mortgage?
I don't think you're crazy for having babies so close in age! I planned my 2u2 (who are 12.5 months apart) and I love it!
In the very early months, it's pure survival mode. Don't worry if your toddler watches too much mickey mouse clubhouse. Don't worry about the housework. Get as much prep work done in the morning for the day before your DH leaves for work. Keep diaper changing stations in the rooms you spend most time in as well as supplies for your toddler (sippy/snacks/toys/books) next to the chair so you can multitask and tend to your toddler while you feed the baby. After that phase we survive by getting out of the house everyday. LO #1 quickly learned to nap on the go, and she quickly fell in our busy schedule of activities. Getting out of the house and talking to other adults helps keep my sanity.
In terms of money we do really well by living with a cash budget. All our necessary bills get paid by automatic bill pay. For things like gas/groceries/discretionary spending we pay with strictly cash. I've really mastered how to shop sales (and am lucky to have 2 kids that aren't picky eaters so I can get whatever produce is deeply discounted that week) so I can keep my grocery bill to $60 a week. Study the circulars and begin to learn what a good price on meat is. We have a deep freezer so we buy in bulk, but you can also buy a lot and individually package what you would eat in a meal in ziplock freezer bags to save room if a deep freezer is not an option. You save a lot by never paying full price for anything.
If half your DH's income goes to your mortgage that's going to be really hard to swing no matter how tightly you budget/how much debt you don't have. Would you be willing to get a part time night job to help bring in some extra cash to avoid the expense of daycare/get to be home with your kids? Waitressing pays really well. Other types of jobs offer evening shifts like call centers/grocery stores/retail/hotels. At time to time real estate offices advertise for weekend receptionists, so that's something else to consider as well.
I'm new at 2u2 my youngest is 3weeks old today, my middle sin is 19 months old. Honestly right now it's very hard my toddler needs a lot of attention and I feel like I'm not getting a chance to enjoy the new born stage with my lo. I feel guilty a lot of the time because no one is getting all of what they need from me they are all getting just enough to get by. I'm hoping it gets better in time and I'm surfeit will be great as they grow up but right now I wish they were a little farther apart in age.
As far as saving money I've been able to be a sahm by couponing, it's a lot of work but so worth it for my family of five I only spent $33 on groceries for this week. Check out krazycouponlady.com and read her link for beginners.