I don't even want to deal with BM...
Holly_1007
member
Over the next 2-3 weeks we are going to have multiple events for SD that both BM/her H and me/DH will be attending. she is just such a psychobiitch I don't want to deal with her!
Yesterday DH got forced at work, so I offered to pick up SD for him (I NEVER do pick ups because I can't stand BM) so an hour or so before pickup she calls me flipping out that I HAVE to get there BEFORE 2:00 because her other kid has early intervention coming to the house. excuse me, what? If DH were going to pick her up it wouldn't be till almost 4! I'm doing BOTH of you a favor, don't call me and yell at me! and I still have over an hour to get there! (fwiw I guess she can't handle having both kids at home at the same time while the younger one has early intervention. I cannot imagine having that little control over my 6 yr old that I have to have early intervention come when she's not there. whatever)
So I get there, and she tries to act like she DIDN'T just call me up and flip out at me! WTH!!! I hardly even talked to her, just SD (plus DS was in the car) so it didn't take long. I'm just SO sick of her!
I don't even know if she knows I'm pregnant yet. I put on a loose sundress with a coverup, and I just looked fat, but like I said it took 2 seconds.
we have SD's graduation (from kindergarten) coming up, SD's birthday party and a gymnastics show. I don't even want to deal with her! I try to at least pretend to be nice when we are in public, but I don't know if I will be able to!
and I totally get this is flame-worthy, just needed to vent and I didn't want to throw it all on DH right now.
Re: I don't even want to deal with BM...
I guess I don't understand how it would be so difficult to do EI with the baby in the living room and have SD play in her room... that's what I would do atleast. BM made a huge stink when she found out she needed EI for the younger child because SD absolutely could NOT be there because she cannot control her at all. whatever, that's her issue. SD is also in school/ camp m-f 8-12, no reason she couldn't have made her EI apts for when SD is gone every morning, especially knowing that DH cannot always be on time for our wed visitations due to work.
BM always just makes a mountain out of a molehill. would it REALLY have killed her if I was 5 mins late yesterday? prob not. but she acted like the friggen world was ending. so annoying
I am not a huge fan of my ex'husbands girlfriend, and with soccer, dance and other school events that they attend as well, I never sit with or near them. It just makes it easier, that way I don't have to pretend to like her.
I feel like this all the time, especially now that BM has voiced her "disapproval" of this pregnancy. I generally deal with her (in person) 3-4 days a week. It's totally acceptable that you don't want to deal with her and don't look forward to having to be around her. That being said, as long as you don't let those feelings interfere with how you interact with SD then you're fine.
As PP said, just don't sit near her. My husband and I always sit at least 2-3 seats away from BM. From the stage/field/studio where K is, it looks like we're sitting together so she feels good about it. Having those 2-3 people between us keeps BM's catty comments to a minimum so that we can still somewhat enjoy whatever activity we're there for.
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SD knows. we told her at easter. she seemed excited, but apparently not excited enough to say anything to BM (that we know about at least) I'm definitely showing, but I have a few things that I can wear that just make me look fat versus pregnant. I plan on wearing a bump-revealing outfit to SD's graduation, that way if BM doesn't know, we will be in public and she can't throw a temper tantrum (hopefully)
Don't sit by her at the events. Last night was my SS's 5th grade graduation event and BM text my husband 5 mins beforehand and said I am sitting in the middle of the gym if you want to sit by me or you may choose to sit where you like. How controlling is that statement -you may sit where you like
So my DH responded to her. I am no sitting by you, you must be crazy to think I would.
She's taken us to court every 3 months over the past several years for more and more CS and the relationship is pretty hostile it just shows what a nut job she is asking him if he wants to sit by her.
I think it's totally fine to sit seperate it's just somthing the kids will have to deal with and honestly I am not sure that they care as long as you are all there.
Whoa. You are certainly brave to tell SD and not tell BM. My husband emailed BM about 5 minutes after I picked up K and told her we were pregnant and telling K that weekend. We figured giving her a few days to process the news without K around would make it a smidge easier for K. I'm sure if SD said something to BM, you'd know. Maybe before wearing a "bump-revealing" outfit you guys should give her a heads up so she doesn't blow a fuse in public. That will be incredibly uncomfortable for everyone.
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we do NOT have a good relationship with BM and 9 times out of 10 not a word is exchanged at pick up/ drop off. we aren't allowed to e-mail/call/text her, we are supposed to communicate through attorneys (per BM's request) I am sure as shyt not paying $250/hr for our attorney to tell BM we're pregnant. It really doesn't affect BM AT ALL, it only affects SD. our theory was if SD wanted to tell BM she could, if not, it will come out eventually. If she does blow a fuse in public, she's the one that looks like an idiot.
^^ Sorry, I had totally forgotten about that nonsense. If she doesn't want any communication, then there's really nothing you guys can do. And you're right, if she blows a fuse in public, she's going to be the one who looks foolish.
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