Spacing

Sunshine4480

Is having two 18 months apart easier, harder or the same as having them 2 years apart?  Opinions please!

MammaBear81

They each have their own pro's and cons.  A two year old generally entertains them self a bit more, can self feed very well, and can follow simple directions, however they are more mobile, start to assert their individuality around two, the "I do myself" phase which is great, but takes 10 times longer some days.  At 18 months apart they are less mobile which makes them easier to contain and throw in a stroller if need be.  They are generally oblivious to the new baby, so not much jealousy , but they are more needy because they still need help doing a lot of things, they can't understand terms like wait one second, and following directions isn't quite as good.

CaitlinJ22

My first 2 are 18 m apart and this baby and DD will be exactly 2 years apart. I can tell that we will have some different challenges like PP said, but it will be more helpful that DD speaks really well and can tell me what she wants. 

 

juliane2004

My two oldest are 14 months apart (so even closer than 1.5 or 2 years) and I like it. DD didn't have jealousy when he was born, because she didn't really even "get" that there was another baby there to stay. Also, as they grew up together, they entertain themselves a lot and play together. Also, I had DD learn to play independently from a very early age, and she was able to do that when I needed to care for DS.

I don't have a 2+ year age gap, but I know a woman with a 2.5 year old and who is due next week. Her son is ATTACHED AT HER HIP. Literally, she carries him often, she entertains him a TON, he falls asleep on her shoulder frequently. I imagine it is going to be extremely difficult when her new baby is born next week and there will be a lot of jealousy issues.

shellylovelee

JUST found out we are preggers last night.  *insert trembling giggle here*

And instantly started reading up on 2 under 2 this morning.  A few articles I've read mentioned, in a nutshell, spacing less than 16 months tends to go easier because the older sibling is pretty clueless about the new baby and seems to adjust as if it were always there.  When they are 18+ months into toddlerdom, it seems to be more challenging (from what I read).  The typical assertion of will without the ability to communicate is made even more difficult when the toddler feels he's competing with the baby.  Again - I have zero experience but had the same question as you.

Either way - the toddler/baby stage is only temporary so I figure you just get through it the best you can.  My little nephews are 14 months apart and are the best of friends.