What are the rules during play dates?

Athena0809

So DS was "playing" with this other kid and my DS was being a little rough trying to "push" him, he was curious about his face and was trying to touch him but it was more of slight slap than anything. I was right there telling him to be gentle and sitting him back down if I felt he was being too rough, the other parent however seemed rather annoyed by my DS (and me maybe?) and kept saying "whoa, easy buddy!" or "hey, nicely!" and pulling his kid back.

So what are the rules? I felt a little defensive because IMO the kids were being kids. Is it OK to "discipline" for lack of better word, someone else's kid or do you say something to the parent? if you see/hear another parent disciplining your LO do you say something? I never thought about it until our last play date.

CanuckFan03

I wonder this as well.  Generally, I think each parent is responsible for parenting/disciplining their own child.  However, I think I have a right to keep my child safe. So if my child is about to get hit/slapped etc, I believe I have the right to pull my child away, grab the other child's hand to avoid, etc. 

Each parents comfort zone will be different. I think I'm pretty relaxed, but other parents may want zero contact.  It's a hard one. 

toadstool

When we go to story time, this kind of contact happens all the time. If it is my DD doing it, I always pull her away and tell her to be gentle. If it is happening to my kid I will pull my child away and or deflect the other child's hand. Everyone know that the one doing the touching is just curious, but at this age they really have a hard time going easy on each other. You don't want anyone to get scratched on the face or poked in the eye.

ETA: I don't have a problem with the kids having contact as long as no one is going for the face or being rough.

pam1005

toadstool:

When we go to story time, this kind of contact happens all the time. If it is my DD doing it, I always pull her away and tell her to be gentle. If it is happening to my kid I will pull my child away and or deflect the other child's hand. Everyone know that the one doing the touching is just curious, but at this age they really have a hard time going easy on each other. You don't want anyone to get scratched on the face or poked in the eye.

ETA: I don't have a problem with the kids having contact as long as no one is going for the face or being rough.

This is exactly what I do.  At this age they don't really understand not to go for the face, but at a play date I would be especially cautious. 

flutepharm87

Every parent is responsible for their own kid (or kids). I usually don't mind other kids touching the boys (unless they're getting hurt) and they're really chill around other babies, so I tend to let it go. But it doesn't offend me if other parents get anxious about the boys touching their kid. If the other parent(s) appears anxious, I'll usually sit down with the boys so I can carefully supervise them touching the other child. If the parent doesn't want any contact at all, then playdates just aren't for them, IMO.