Paternity results... (kind of long)
I know I'm opening a can of worms with this one but here's the story.
I was seeing this guy for giggles (we mutually agreed that nothing was really going to come of it) and only actually saw him three times. During the time I saw him Super bowl happened and I was hanging out with a friend and due to an over excessive amount of drinking I don't really remember how the night ended but my friend claims up and down we slept together.
Well out of all this comes my Lo....
My friend agreed to a paternity test because he swore up and down that we slept together... the results came back this morning and they are negative... as I figured they would be as the measurements for LO are bigger then the original conception date guess.
Now I'm sitting here wondering how the frick I'm going to tell the other guy. He has no idea and we haven't spoken at all... I only have his cell number and as is pretty easy to do he may have changed it...
Normally I would just let history be history and that's that BUT.... I was adopted by my step dad when I was very young and didn't know my real dad or that I even had another dad until one of my siblings threw it in my face when we were younger... that feeling was horrible and I spent years trying to find my real dad. I don't want my baby to have to go through that but at the same time... how do you tell a stranger you are having his baby???
I don't want anything from him or anything but its only fair that he knows. I just don't know how to tell him.
Re: Paternity results... (kind of long)
Wow. I'm in a similar situation but I let both my ex and my friend know everything. I'm only 7 weeks so I haven't been to the doctor yet. My friends a gynecologist and feels that it's 95% my ex's. Anyway, you'll know when and how's best to tell him. And since you know what it's like to not know your father, you have the ability to at least provide a name for you child. You have a lot more control in this situation than it seems. Take your time, think about what you want to do, and when you know, you'll know! Whatever happens will be perfect and exactly what needs to happen right now. Good luck!
On another note, how did you do a paternity test so soon? You're 17 weeks? I thought they couldn't do paternity tests until after the baby was born. Or through and amino or CVS? What did you do? I'm interested?
I wouldn't have done the paternity this early if I hadn't had to do the Amnio. I'm a carrier for Cystic Fibrosis and without the paternal side to test my doctor and I agreed that knowing before baby was born would be best so I have time to prepare. Once the Amnio was decided upon I told my doctor that I had someone willing to a paternity test and the hospital gave me information in regards to go about getting the correct kit and samplings. From the day of the Amnio it took only a week to hear back on the results. It wasn't cheap though and there is always risk for doing the Amnio so I wouldn't do it unless you have to. It wasn't a horrible procedure but no fun nonetheless.