Should I feel concerned?... (siggy warning)

rjblack424

A friend i've confided in over my m/c asked me if I was going to consult my Dr. about my lack of being able to conceive.  I, personally, wasn't too concerned, until I started thinking about it.  This will be our 9th cycle ttc, and 4 cycle ttcal.  After talking with all of you wonderful ladies for so long, the time has passed and I didn't feel like 4 ttcal or 9 cycles total was a long time, but maybe it is for the outsider?  I'm not concerned, but my friend is making me double think myself...?  Should I be?  I have a check up in June with my Dr, not sure what she'll do, but she wanted to check on me after 4 months after my m/c.  It takes the normal couple up to a year to conceive, right?  Should I ask more specific questions at my check up? 

killian09

If you are concerned, you should definitely talk to your doctor about it.

 BUT I would say this is totally normal time to TTC and I'd be surprised if your doc recommended any intervention.  As long as you are under 35 and don't have any reason to suspect a fertility problem (regular cycles and previous pregnancies), almost all docs will say to give it 1 year.  Since rates of infertility are higher for older women and time is of the essence, they say to give it 6 months if you are over 35.  And the fact that you achieved 1 pg in that time, even if it wasn't your take home baby, further suggests that there is not a fertility problem (at least of the sort that would mean you can't get pregnant on your own easily).

ktsnshn

I would not be too concerned, but I would probably bring it up since you are going in anyway. I always like to know what my doctors next plan is.

rjblack424

Okay, I didn't think anything was of any concern, but man she made me second guess myself.  AF came a few days ago, and so here comes cycle 9, and I honestly didn't think anything of it, except, 'I need more wondfo's!' lol   I'm not concerned... i just wanted to make sure I wasn't brushing it off when I should be giving it more thought.  I'll chat with the doc in June   i'm 29, so below the 35 range, but with having the other two with ease, its making me think i'm not giving this much concern if I should be?  Thank you ladies!  I very much appreciate it!!! 

rjblack424

car seat:

If you're feeling concerned, I don't see any harm in asking your doctor at your appointment.  I wouldn't try to go in sooner - June's coming up fast.  But it never hurts to ask!

I'm assuming those beautiful kiddos in your siggy are biologically yours?  Did you have any trouble with either of them?  The good news is that (assuming they're yours, not step-kids or adopted) you've had success in the past.  Secondary IF is a very real thing, and it sucks.  That could be going on, but it's more likely that you just haven't hit that lucky cycle yet.

Either way, ask, if for no other reason than for peace of mind.  We have to be our own advocates, and it won't do any harm to ask for a doctor's opinion.

*hugs*

And don't let people with little experience get you down!  When we were in our first few months TTC a friend found out I'm Rh- and told me I need to get help quickly because my body would probably kill any Rh+ baby.  She was a dumbass and didn't understand the tiny bit of information that she had about Rh factors.  After that I had about a zillion idiotic comments from people who didn't know WTF they were talking about.

Thank you so much for your sweet words and positivity!  And yes, those are my sweet boys.  I love them to pieces and thank God every day for them, because 4 & 7 years ago I didn't realize quite what miracles they were.  I had no idea what a reality m/c were until a few months ago, and how unfortunately common they are.   What a shock this world has given me.  It has made me appreciate everything I have so much more, and I don't take, for one second, any day I have with my boys.  I appreciate all you ladies have given me, both hugs and help, and don't know what I would have done without finding this board.  My world was turned upside down and thank goodness I found the help I did here at this board.  Thank you so much! xo

Gregermis

You can always talk to your doctor, but unless you are AMA your time frame isn't unreasonable.  We wre TTC for a whole year before we sought medical intervention.

ella.mabel

My OB told me the general rule for her is that she doesn't start any intervention until 1 year, or 6 months for those over 35. Both times i got pregnant, it was on my first try, and now i'm approaching 10 months this time around.  When I spoke to my doctor last time, she told me that she sees lots of couples who have early success, then get frustrated when the next pregnancy takes a year.  Every time i talk to her, she just tells me to be patient.  Grrr.... it's so frustrating sometimes.  I think sometimes people think it's so easy because people tend to keep their struggles private.  If you have a checkup anyway, it certainly can't hurt to talk about it and might give you some peace of mind.  Good luck to you and I hope you have success soon!