I'm ashamed

SunnyCanadian

Warning - Sad info discussed... 

You guys I need a kick in the a$$ for feeling sorry for myself.

Mother's Day was of course hard to get through with absolutely NO ACKNOWLEDGEMENT from anyone but tonight at ball we found out one of our teammates was diagnosed with leukemia over the weekend. He's a single dad to two little kids. We don't know many details but he's already started chemo today - does that mean it's aggressive? It's soo sad and so out of the blue! We were just playing ball together last week and BAM! life throws a curveball (literally )

Then at the end of the game, my friend, who just had a baby, tells me one of our mutual friends is pregnant. The mutual friend and I had a good chat at my friend's baby shower about my m/c and she told me that her period was late and she was actually going to test after the shower! I guess it was positive. When my friend told me this mutual friend was pregnant I felt like I was punched in the stomach, all I managed to say was "Oh really?"

We left and I felt the tears streaming down my face, DH was in a funk since we lost the game so we didn't talk all the way home. He didn't know I was upset.

When we got home I saw a text from my mom saying my brother's best friend's dad had just died from a heart attack! What the he!! is going on?????

I'm so sad...sad for my teammate, sad for my brother's best friend and sad and MAD at myself for feeling sorry for myself because I'm not pregnant and someone else is. I really hate myself right now. That is all

ETA: If you can spare some prayers for both my teammate and my brother's best friend and their families I'd really appreciate it

paisleybaby33

Veganlady:

That's a real crapstorm, I'm so sorry. Why can't life deal this junk out bit by bit?

 You're not a bad person for wishing you were the one with the BFP. We all do.

((hugs))

All of this. I will say a prayer tonight for both your teammate and your friends family. I also pray that tomorrow's dawn brings you peace and hope. (hugs) 

beppa627

Don't be ashamed!!!  We don't get over our loss completely... ever.  My prayers are with you and your friends.  Life sucks sometimes.

GatorBaby2012

I'm sorry. ((hugs))

LSzwaya

I am so so sorry. That is WAY too much for someone to be dealing with right now. Don't beat yourself up about the pregnant friend. It is OK to be sad. I am thinking about you! ((hugs))

holly_g13

wow, thats a lot to get within a few days of each other. Its okay to be sad/mad about someone elses happiness. You've been through a lot. I will definitely keep your teammate and brothers best friends dad in my thoughts. sending some extra {hugs} your way

JennOH85

I'm so sorry, Sunny. My T&Ps are with you and your family and friends who are hurting today. ((hugs))

ktsnshn

((hugs)) That is so much to go through at once. I will keep your friends in my prayers.

sammer818

*HUGS* That is a lot to deal with and all at the same time. Everyone is in my T&P.

PS: Don't be mad at you for feeling sorry for yourself. It's a natural thing. I think we've all probably felt that way at one time or another.

thatlauragirl

beppa627:

Don't be ashamed!!!  We don't get over our loss completely... ever.  My prayers are with you and your friends.  Life sucks sometimes.

Exactly! I'm so sorry for everything going on, sending lots of t&p your way. ((hugs))

shellyco

Huge ((HUGS)) to you, and sending good vibes to your teammate and brother's friend.  You do not need a kick in the azz.  You deserve to feel sorry for yourself!  Remember we are all here for you!

SunnyCanadian

Thank you ladies for your kind words of wisdom, I'm giving ya'll a huge hug right now!

DaisyZH

That is a lot to deal with all at once!  Please don't feel bad or be mad at yourself, it is really natural to be sad not because your friend is pregnant but only because you want to be too.  I totally understand as I'm sure everyone on here does.  It's okay to feel like that, and I will pray for your teammate and your brother's best friend, and for you as well.  (( Hugs ))

buckeyebaby814

::HUGS:: and many prayers.