Attachment Parenting

Help me break disappointing news to DD...

This is not really AP-related, but I consider this my "home" board (even though I haven't posted much lately). DD's birthday is next Friday. We're living in a new country, she doesn't have many new friends and we drummed up the whole idea of all the grandparents visiting instead of planning any kind of big party with kids she barely knows. She has been really, really looking forward to spending her birthday with both sets of grandparents.

My parents arrived already, so we do have one set of GPs present. However, MIL just emailed me to say they can't come. MIL's own mother (aged almost 90) is very ill and absolutely can't be left alone right now. I need to break the news to DD sometime this weekend. We warned her last week when it seemed like GMIL's health was poor and DD didn't take that well at all. Now I need to tell her they really won't be here. Gaaaaa. I feel terrible for DD, and MIL as well.  

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Re: Help me break disappointing news to DD...

  • Aw, that sucks  Can you take her to some place awesome as a consolation prize instead? Can MIL come at a later date, so you can frame it as a rain check? I would think if it's framed as, "Grandma can't come, but we're going to x place for your bday instead!" that might ease the blow. 
    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

  • imagenosoup4u:
    Can MIL come at a later date, so you can frame it as a rain check?

    This is what i would try to work out. GL 

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  • I would just explain it to her as gently as possible  & help her sort out her feelings. Like "I know you are really disappointed/sad/whatever" & just be there for her. There's not really much you can do in this situation, & it's an experience that will help her learn to deal with disappointment. If they will be able to visit another time, explain that to her as well.  
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  • Maybe you can do skype or facetime while you have the cake/dessert for her birthday dinner?  even if it means someone has to get up really late at night or whatever? 

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