How did you sort out which kid gets which bedroom

bebe11

So we are in the very begining stages of house hunting for a new place.  H, DD and I were looking on the ipad the other night at houses, and my DD (she is 10), starts asking about who will get the bigger room, or if a room as a bathroom will she get it....etc.  My first thought was the kid who sleeps at the house more often would get the "better" or get frist pick of the bedroom.  Would that be fair?

When My H and moved in together, my DD and I moved into his house, so SS already had a bedroom, so we didn't have to deal with this.  What would you do?  SS is 14 and DD is 10. 

Thanks!

Littlejen22

I would give the bigger room or the one with more storage to the kid with more stuff in your house, the kids do not have a say or there can be more resentment. Be careful of bigger rooms though, sometimes they have more windows and less wall space which is needed for furniture. 

Ginlyn0

When we move, I'm not sure how it will be handled. It depends on how many bedrooms we end up getting and if my nephew still lives with us at that time.

At this point though, DS the only kid that is at our house 24/7 and he shares our room. My nephew is here the most besides DS (he visits his dad about 1x a month) and he and the boys (when they are here 2x a month) share the smallest bedroom. Originally DD & SD were given the bigger room because DD is here all but 2 weekends a month and the boys room used to set empty except for 2 weekends a months so that made the most sense.

We had planned on moving DS into the boys room by this time but we never anticipated having to have my nephew live with us.

CFjo2010

When I was a kid (I'm not from a blended family though), the oldest got first choice of bedrooms.  As the baby I hated it, but that's the way it worked.  We have adopted that same mindset as a blended family, with the exception that since the girls share a bedroom they got the larger room and then my son got the next choice.  The room that was left over became the office. 

blush64

jobalchak:

When I was a kid (I'm not from a blended family though), the oldest got first choice of bedrooms.  As the baby I hated it, but that's the way it worked.  We have adopted that same mindset as a blended family, with the exception that since the girls share a bedroom they got the larger room and then my son got the next choice.  The room that was left over became the office. 

I am not from a blended family but for us the oldest always got first choice.

socloudy99

It one of the bedrooms ends up with a bathroom attached (other then the master) I would put DD in it no matter what. My teen and tween SDs spend so much more time and have so many more bathroom things then SS will ever have. If a tween girl can have their own bathroom I would go for it every time!

karatechrissy

We will be house hunting probably in the next 2 years. We have already outgrown this one (we weren't expecting to have 2 children as soon as we bought this place!). In our situation we have SS 50/50. He is 4 years older than my daughter, and 5 years older than my son now. I think we will probably let SS pick his room, since he is older and the babies are, well, babies. lol. As it is now, we have a 3 bedroom house. I have the babies share the nursery, and SS has his own room. The babies are in the larger of the 2 rooms (It's only a couple of feet, one room is 12X10 the other is 10X10). I also have all the toys in SS's room though. So his room sort of doubles as his room/toy room. I know that SOUNDS terrible, but there is no room in the nursery between 2 cribs, changing table and 2 dressers for any toys. Plus it helps keep everything sort of concentrated in 1 area rather than me saying 'this goes in here, this goes in the other room'. SS doesn't mind and actually loves playing in his room with his siblings, so far it hasn't presented as a problem. BUT I know once they start getting older SS will want his own 'space'. Once my son moves into a toddler bed (probably a good year or so away) we will combine the boys and let my daughter have her own room until we move into a bigger house.

I think it really depends on the dynamic of the family, how often children are there, etc... does your SS come 50/50 or EOW? If it's EOW, I think I would personally be more inclined to give your DD a 'bigger room' or the connected bathroom. That is, if she resides in your home most of the time (which it sounds like that's the case). Not every house will have that bathroom connected though, and some houses have same sizes in the other bedrooms besides the master. It depends on the house, and your family dynamic. (I have to add that if you have SS 50/50 I think it would be more fair to let him 'pick' his room, as he is older, and does spend a fair amount of time in the house. Just my opinion though).

karleegirl

Littlejen22:

I would give the bigger room or the one with more storage to the kid with more stuff in your house, the kids do not have a say or there can be more resentment. Be careful of bigger rooms though, sometimes they have more windows and less wall space which is needed for furniture. 

I agree. I'd consider what a pp said about the bathroom as well.

XIrishPrincessX

We're moving after the wedding into a bigger house and out  of our crowded loft and I've been wondering how to handle this too!  I was thinking of doing it the opposite way.  Youngest gets first pick, seeing SS1 is 19 and really won't be spending too much time at our house but my brother and  SS2 will be more invested in what bedroom they get.  

 

bebe11

karatechrissy:

We will be house hunting probably in the next 2 years. We have already outgrown this one (we weren't expecting to have 2 children as soon as we bought this place!). In our situation we have SS 50/50. He is 4 years older than my daughter, and 5 years older than my son now. I think we will probably let SS pick his room, since he is older and the babies are, well, babies. lol. As it is now, we have a 3 bedroom house. I have the babies share the nursery, and SS has his own room. The babies are in the larger of the 2 rooms (It's only a couple of feet, one room is 12X10 the other is 10X10). I also have all the toys in SS's room though. So his room sort of doubles as his room/toy room. I know that SOUNDS terrible, but there is no room in the nursery between 2 cribs, changing table and 2 dressers for any toys. Plus it helps keep everything sort of concentrated in 1 area rather than me saying 'this goes in here, this goes in the other room'. SS doesn't mind and actually loves playing in his room with his siblings, so far it hasn't presented as a problem. BUT I know once they start getting older SS will want his own 'space'. Once my son moves into a toddler bed (probably a good year or so away) we will combine the boys and let my daughter have her own room until we move into a bigger house.

I think it really depends on the dynamic of the family, how often children are there, etc... does your SS come 50/50 or EOW? If it's EOW, I think I would personally be more inclined to give your DD a 'bigger room' or the connected bathroom. That is, if she resides in your home most of the time (which it sounds like that's the case). Not every house will have that bathroom connected though, and some houses have same sizes in the other bedrooms besides the master. It depends on the house, and your family dynamic. (I have to add that if you have SS 50/50 I think it would be more fair to let him 'pick' his room, as he is older, and does spend a fair amount of time in the house. Just my opinion though).

He has been coming over EOW, with my H's new work schedule.  However, where we are moving is closer to BM, so he may come over more, since it will be so close, but I don't know for sure.  More than likely the rooms will be equal in size, as that is the way it seems on the places I've been looking at.  So I am hoping there won't be an issue.

ballmom

Oh boy, this was a cause of argument in our house. We moved to get a "fresh start" and there is one bedroom (non-master bedroom) that is bigger than the other bedrooms. I obviously felt my DD should have that room since 1) she is here full time and 2) she had more things (toys, art supplies, etc). SO felt SD should have it as the oldest girl. I said it was silly to give her a room that big for 4-6 days a month when we would have storage issues with DD.

Basically it came down to my DD(then 9) got the biggest room, DS(then 17) was given the room away from everyone and SD and SS chose the remaining two rooms. Now that our DD is here, we had to rearrange everyone. SS took DS's room and DS moved to the attic. Eventually my DDs will be swapping rooms so the youngest will get the big room to store toys in.

lily_721

In my family growing up, my sister had the bedroom closest to my parents (she was the baby and had attachment issues).  I had the biggest bedroom.  My brother had whatever was left.

In my house, SS1 has the biggest bedroom (as the oldest).