Clean Slate or Nod to Women Still in the Struggle?

Raggedy1

If/When you have what we all want - a baby - will you be keeping a note in your siggy about your IF struggle, or will you wipe your siggy slate clean?  

I notice a lot of women on other boards mentioning their IF struggle but their siggy doesn't mention a thing of it... sometimes that bugs me, like they got their LO and they want to forget the struggle but they don't realize what a support it would be to IF-ers to see their struggle and their success(es).  Is that totally crazy? Thoughts?  

Raggedy1

I don't think I'll keep the whole history listed, but I think I will mention it... like "After 2 years of trying, our little IUI/IVF/whatever miracle"

crazytowne

I don't plan to remove my IF siggy.  Maybe I'll condense the monthly details.  But I intend, once I have a pregnancy that sticks, to trumpet from the roof about my IF struggle.  I don't want to "come out" yet -- only a few close friends and my family know -- because I don't want stupid advice.  But I will break the IF silence all by myself if necessary!

MBJune

I don't think I will remove it.  I feel like removing it means that I will forget what it took to get that far.  Not too many people IRL know about our Dx, but once we have a little one I hope DH is on board with telling people about IF and everything we dealt with.  (I know I haven't dealt with as much as some, but to me it feels like we are just beginning.)

katib77

I try to keep my siggy fairly short and to the point.  I'm sure if I ever get PG I will shorten it even more to "TTC Since July 2009.  Dx: Infertility MFI & LPD.  After 4 IUI got our miracle through IVF#1" - - that kind of thing.  But then I'm an advocate and love to educate people on it.  I can see some women after it's over, not forget about it...but to put it in the past.  To each there own.

crazytowne

justplanelove:

If I were open about it now, I think I would get defensive when people ask questions & that would hinder them learning about it.

Exactly.

imwithrebel

I definitely will keep something about my struggle in my signature, though as others have said a condensed version rather than the month play by play.

In real life, I will also be a lot more open about our struggle. I hope that one day I'll be able to give someone the help and support I wish I had through this.

maggie2324

I will also condense, but not remove it. That bothers me too when it's gone. There was a post on the multiples board about IVF recently and most of those who chimed in about their IVFs had no IF mention in their siggy :-(

Native+Girl

Hmm...I've never paid attention to that. After all the struggle we've gone through, there's no forgetting that. I'll condense my siggy, but I want everyone and their pappy to know how hard we fought for our LO.

DebateThis

I've been very open with coworkers and friends about our struggle (and subsequently why this loss/starting over is going to be so hard and scary) - I don't think my sig should be any different. It's been a long, hard battle and obviously will continue to be hard - I think other IF folks appreciate hearing/seeing siggies that people are struggling similarly (at least I know I have).

brachatzipora

I'll definitely say something about the years/# of cycles and if we end up doing IVF. Not sure if I'll include MFI but I might... It gives me hope to see success after MFI. 

ChrisH22

I have to agree.  I'll take out the month by month play by play, but still leave how long it's been and whatever steps we end up taking to get our BFP.  I agree with you about the support it is to see it.  Sometimes when I see women posting their BFP's I go to theiry siggy to look and see what they went through and what finally worked, its a great encouragement some days.

Shayliz

I'll take in the cycle info but leave my dx/what treatment worked. 

Durham1008

Like others, I will condense but not remove the info completely. I always appreciate seeing things like "after 3 IUIs, finally got our miracle baby" etc. It reminds me there are people who have gotten through this before.

violetmarie61516

I will definitely keep my IF struggles in my siggy in some way.  Also, just a side note, some boards have issues with longer siggies so depending on the board you frequent, that may be why pp don't list as much.  BUT, I definitely agree with your thoughts.

MrsZ816

I definitely want to keep some mention of IF in my siggy.  Whether I like it or not, IF is part of who I am and a big part of the journey to parenthood for DH and I.