Sad but not like I thought I would be?

kwilson158

Today is 1 month since I miscarried...It was my first and I feel like I should be so emotional right now...But I am not...Please don't get me wrong I am so sad that it happened and everytime I see a pregnant lady or anything baby related I think "Why Not Me"...I hurts that I am not pregnant right now...I have constant reminders that I am not pregnant and everybody else is...I should be starting my 2nd trimester this week 

Maybe I grieved so much the first 2 weeks that I don't have anything else to cry? I feel so horrible that I am not as emotional right now as I thought I would be? Am I a bad person because I am not upset??

 Is it ok to grieve and not cry?

 

 

rebekam

Everyone grieves differently! So of course it is ok. I cried and cried for the first week and then the second week I felt numb. Now I have days where I cry again and days when I feel like I miss it but I manage. HUGE HUGS being sent your way!

Gregermis

Of course!  Everyone is different  ((hugs))

Mom2anAngel2

Grieve how ever you needed to grieve.  Everyone is different, and no one can tell you how you should and should not feel.  ((HUGS))

kpowers982

Like everyone has said...people grieve differently.  There's no right or wrong way.  Hugs!

Laurakat81

There is no normal in this. Everyone is very different and sometime grief comes and goes. (((hugs)))

kristina_1016

I was the same way. I would think "I should feel sadder than I am", but sometimes when you see a "reminder" it hits you like a ton of bricks. Especially the pregnant people and babies.

I have found that I am a little better now that we are trying again. It's like I have hope again.

But we all do definitely cope differently.

QuigleyCat1

Cry if you need to cry.  Laugh if you need to laugh.  There's no wrong way to grieve!  Be yourself and let yourself be.   Hugs to you!

kwilson158

Thank you all so much for your kind words and support - I feel like maybe when AF comes and goes I will feel better because then I can TTC again - I really hate that any of us have to feel this way -

raashton

There are no rules for grief nor is your way a barometer for how much you loved your baby. 

MissRachel621

Anything you're feeling is totally okay.  It's a confusing time.  I was "fine" for a few weeks after my first m/c and then I pretty much lost it.  Constant crying, too much wine, all of it.  For me, the stages of grief definitely applied.  Give yourself as much time as you want or need to feel however you feel.  xoxo

ChloBub

Whatever you feel is okay. There's no "right" way to grieve, even though others might try to tell you there is! (((HUGS)))

imwithrebel

Grieving is such an individual and often strange process. You aren't a bad person.

I too felt like I should be sadder. It bothered me for a while that I was devastated over my (false) negative beta at 14 dpo and cried so much, but then on "CD3" when I went to start my new round of treatment got a positive beta. I had to wait all weekend and really thought it might have finally worked. When I found out that Monday that it was over, I didn't cry and it really bothered me. But I guess it was just my way of dealing with everything.

sunsetlove

i agree with the ladies.. everyone grieves differently.. sending prayers your way...