Would you be upset or am I over-reacting?

Yessika024

KlondikeBar:

Yes, you are overreacting.

In fact, if my children's names were on a shower invite, I'd white them out and tell DH they were absolutely not invited. lol

 haha, you are hysterical! Seriously, thanks for making me laugh!

Smootchy

KlondikeBar:

Yes, you are overreacting.

In fact, if my children's names were on a shower invite, I'd white them out and tell DH they were absolutely not invited. lol

Lol!  

rebs

I love how people who aren't throwing the party want to dictate the rules for it...

Seriously dude, call and say "Hey, is this adults only or can I bring DD?" if it is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important to you.  Why it is, I can't really imagine.  Do they make a point of not including your daughter? Were you always picked last in gym? Honestly am at a loss to understand your reaction at all.  But hey, if you think it is worth it to upset your husband then go for it...

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ntyravgmom

Yes, jealous. I figured you were jealous that not all of the attention would be on you and your family. That your dh's cousin is pregnant around the same time you are. So your IL's are focusing on another precious bundle as well as yours.

 ITA with the above poster..

"I love how people who aren't throwing the party want to dictate the rules for it...

Seriously dude, call and say "Hey, is this adults only or can I bring DD?" if it is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo important to you.  Why it is, I can't really imagine.  Do they make a point of not including your daughter? Were you always picked last in gym? Honestly am at a loss to understand your reaction at all.  But hey, if you think it is worth it to upset your husband then go for it..."

pepomntpat

I had kids at my baby shower. That said if you aren't even asking for clarification you are really over reacting. I don't think my host put any babies' names on the invites, though I am not sure. I loved having the kids there. Then again I'm not a big AW IRL.

RasberryBrainstorm

I don't think it's a jealousy thing, but I DO think there are some kind of issues there between you and the cousin and/or DH's family. I don't think we're getting the complete story.

shakes

I didn't finish reading this thread, but yes you're overreacting. Not just overreacting but bordering on petty betch. The whole 'I wont call, I wont ask, I'm just going to be super mad and not go and look like an ahole" thing isn't working. Is it possible it happened like this?

person : hey are the invites addressed?

person 2: yeah here.

person: shiz, this doesn't have Yessika's dd's name on it.

person 2: oh no, sorry!!!

person: it's ok, I'll mention it to her when she calls.

No? You're sure it was all : ....don't invite Yessica's dd!!!!!11!!!1!!! 

 Just pick up the phone, and ask.

Heather R

Mom2Oli:

$%^@#$^#@$%@ to the kids don't belong at parties.

At my baby shower, children and spouses were welcome. It's a celebration of a new baby, in my opinion, kids belong there. Bridal showers or adult birthdays, I can understand.

I *think* people didn't mean kids don't belong there... just that you can't assume kids are invited there.

Anyway, another vote for over-reacting.

 

ames71

Ridiculous and laughable. And sweet Moses, yes, you're overreacting.

racegrrl714

KlondikeBar:

Yes, you are overreacting.

In fact, if my children's names were on a shower invite, I'd white them out and tell DH they were absolutely not invited. lol

 Ha ha! THIS exactly...

MJHershey

I always just checked with friends to see if it was kid-friendly... if not, I moved on. It's a simple "Hey is LO included? I just need to know so I can make plans if needed!"

But if you instead refuse to call and instead have a hissy...

 

ANJ410

I have not read the other responses, but I have never been to a shower,in a house  or a restaurant, where there were children there.

Arnegard

MomlovesEloise:

Are you sure they just didn't put her name on the invite? Maybe it was assumed that you would bring her along? It's also possible that they just wanted a grown up shower. 

I would talk to them before you get too upset.  

Ditto this.
I did turn down a shower when DD1 was about 5 mo (DH had to work, I worked FT and EBF).  A college friend specifically said she did not want babies at her baby shower.  Fine, you don't get me then either.

cchill01

MomlovesEloise:

Are you sure they just didn't put her name on the invite? Maybe it was assumed that you would bring her along?

Um...this.  I've hosted LOTS of events and I don't EVER put a toddler's name on the invite.  The only time I actually intended to exclude them was at my wedding.  For everything else, the kids just come along. 

FirstBabyMomma

ANJ410:

I have not read the other responses, but I have never been to a shower,in a house  or a restaurant, where there were children there.

Complete opposite here. I have never been to a shower, in a house or a restaurant, where there were NOT children there. Baby showers = family-friendly around here. 

Yessika024

For all asking why i am not responding to the "why won't i call".  I have responded to that way in the beginning.  It's not that I won't call, i however prefer not to.  I don't want his aunt to be pushed into a corner and have to say "yes" if they really intended on not inviting DD. 

Also, there is nothing going on with DH's side and us.  We barely even see them, which is another reason I assumed that DD would be invited as well, so she could see her family/cousins etc.  As for her name not being on the invite. IMHO it shouldn't matter if the child is a month old or 4, if you want them there it has always been (in my etiquette teaching anyway) to include the peoples names you are inviting on the invitation so no questions are asked further down the road.  If the name is not on the invite, again the way i was brought up, it means the person is not invited..whether it's an adult or child.  When I had my shower 2 years ago my friend had just had a baby a month prior, I made sure to include the name of the child on the invitation so she wouldn't have to call me and ask if she could bring her daughter along.  This way it solved 2 situations, me not looking like an idiot that i "forgot" to include the child's name, and also her not having to call to "clarify" that she could bring her daughter along.  Again, EVERYONE is different though. 

nealbl

Most people don't send mail addressed to children or think to put a child's name on the invite. I would simply call and say is this child friendly. I think before clarifying that yes you are over-reacting. Also if they say no it is not kid friendly that is their choice. They do not have to invite your child if they are wanting an adult party.

st.augbride

Majorly overreacting. This isn't a big deal. Just ask if she's invited or if kids should stay home. It's just a party.

Luckie519

I think you are over reacting.  I have been to very few showers that have allowed children.  On a few occasions, I have had the friend call me and say it was ok to bring DS.  If you want to ask about bringing your LO, then you can, but don't bite her head off if she tells you it's a no go.

laurakaz13

iris427:

You are refusing to go because you can't bring your toddler?  Toddlers are a PITA.  Go and enjoy the child-free time.  And it is perfectly normal not to invite children to showers.

This.  I don't think kids belong at showers ever anyway.