The 'Grandma' obsession

littlelovelolo

Old poster returning here, and I need some heeeeeelp. I have a 2 year old who spends three days a week at my mom's house, and 2 days a week at daycare while I work. We recently moved from an apartment into a duplex (just mentioning this in case it's a factor).

Recently, DD has been really attached to her grandma (my mom). In the sense where Grandma is all she asks for at bedtime, dinner time, pretty much anytime. Though I knooooow I shouldn't take it personally, I do, and it hurts, although I don't blame my mom or anyone else, I'm sure it's just a kid thing. The problem is that it makes it nearly impossible to get her to do anything, and I mean anything. Grandma is literally all she thinks about all the time. I can't get her into the bath, can't drop her off at daycare without crocodile tears and having her call for Grandma, can't get her to eat, because she's so preoccupied with wanting to go to Grandma's house. But here's the kicker: when she's at Grandma's, all she talks about is wanting to go to daycare.

My mom agrees that some kind of separation needs to happen so that DD isn't so obsessed with her, because the obsession is making her act out everywhere, not just at our house. Anyone have any advice for nipping this 'Grandma' thing in the bud?

LoveEeyore

I would make her a calendar- if even a week- and put a pic of you ahd DH on the weekends, GM on thedays she's with her, and DCP on those days.  When she starts, whip it out and ask what day is today?   Oh- it says ____.  You see Grandma on Thursday. 

I would completely ignore the GM factor and focus on the behavior.  Ignore that she's yelling for GM, but focus on using a calm voice.  Tell her she can send an email to GM after bath if she does it nicely, then reward it and let her dictate a letter to gma .  Encourage GMa to write back praising good behavior.  Change Gma from her weapon to yours!

littlelovelolo

LoveEeyore:

I would make her a calendar- if even a week- and put a pic of you ahd DH on the weekends, GM on thedays she's with her, and DCP on those days.  When she starts, whip it out and ask what day is today?   Oh- it says ____.  You see Grandma on Thursday. 

I would completely ignore the GM factor and focus on the behavior.  Ignore that she's yelling for GM, but focus on using a calm voice.  Tell her she can send an email to GM after bath if she does it nicely, then reward it and let her dictate a letter to gma .  Encourage GMa to write back praising good behavior.  Change Gma from her weapon to yours!

I didn't even think about having a visual representation of her schedule. *facepalm* Great idea!

LoveEeyore

Good luck!  I use visuals alot- especially when DH travels- we look at it every day and I have the kids point to today, count how many days until he's here, guess what they'll do that day, etc.  Hope it works!