long-staying guests with 3 month old

Hala2010

I hope you don't mind me crashing to ask a question about having guests over with a 3 month old. They (parents-in-law) will be visiting from overseas when the baby is that age, and will be staying with us. I am not comfortable having them help at all, however much they would like to, so they will be treated as guests. Can taking care of a 3 month old and guests at the same time work out? H will be doing most of the the "taking care of them," but I am still the milk provider, and therefore will have to wake with LO, etc... and I have no idea what my hormones will be doing at that time. I guess I'm just trying to figure out how demanding a 3 month old is.... will they sleep through the night, for instance? Will I be bleary eyed all day, and be in no mood to be polite to anyone? Thanks for any help - it will help me figure out how many - if any - weeks I can do this for. If they stay at a hotel, they will be over all day anyway, so similar issues...  

julesjarvais65

I think it will be a play it by ear kinda thing for how you feel. It will all depend on your baby if they will be sleeping through the night by them. Some babies do sooner, some don't. Mine still doesn't at 2.5 months. At 3 months, you should have a little more energy though. You should have a slight routine now, maybe not a set schedule yet, but your baby will likely be eating more routinely at this point. My LO gets up to eat a couple time a night, but I'm usually only up for like 10 min at a time, if that (we co-sleep though).

Good luck!!

Llbrjb

Every baby is different, and every new mom is different! My LO is three months and although I wouldn't relish having long term guests, I would definitely be able to manage it. My LO is only up once in the night. I have good energy and have been feeling like myself again for the last five or six weeks. Personally, I love having people around to help with LO. It is wonderful to take a long shower or a middle of the day nap once in a while! I would go nuts with people around all the time, though, so I would have to set up quiet times for myself. 

FarmvilleLover

My son is almost exactly 3 months and I feel great. Luckily, he's sleeping through the night and has a good routine (knock wood) so we know what to expect for the most part.  Definitely a HUGE difference from the first 6 weeks, with the first 2 weeks being the worst. The way I was the first 6 weeks is markedly different from now.  I'd definitely be fine with guests.

But, all moms and babies are different. I just wanted to give you my experience. 

Hala2010

Llbrjb:

Every baby is different, and every new mom is different! 

Yes, you're right of course. I just wish I had a magic mirror that let me see into the future... I am a first time mom-to-be as well, which doesn't help. The thing is, we need to let the inlaws know before I deliver about how long they can stay over, so they can make travel plans. I don't want to tell them they can stay as long as they want (I foresee a 3 month visit that will drive me batty), but nor do I want to shortchange them and say only one week will do, if I am able to hold up better. The last time they came, it didn't go so well... and that was without a baby thrown into the mix. Oh well.

megaloo27

My LO is almost three months and we have had many guests stay with us. Let them help if they offer. If you don't want help with the housework have them entertain baby while you get stuff done. My parents came and my dad fixes the sink, fixed the trunk of my car, cleaned my bathroom, fixed a chair and mom helped organize baby stuff and did dishes. It was awesome! 

Huahine

FarmvilleLover:

My son is almost exactly 3 months and I feel great. Luckily, he's sleeping through the night and has a good routine (knock wood) so we know what to expect for the most part.  Definitely a HUGE difference from the first 6 weeks, with the first 2 weeks being the worst. The way I was the first 6 weeks is markedly different from now.  I'd definitely be fine with guests.

But, all moms and babies are different. I just wanted to give you my experience. 

butting in . . . FL - what a great shot of your little one! 

Huahine

It sounds like you are planning to nurse.  Will you be comfortable nursing in front of them?  If not, make sure you have a comfortable private place to nurse. I'll nurse in front of absolute strangers, my FIL, service guys at the car dealership, whatever.  But nursing in front of my dad makes me uncomfortable.  So when he is staying with us I tend to go in another room to nurse or just do it and feel awkward about it and that wears on me after a while. 

You may find that you really like having company.  I love my little dude, but I need a break!  I love being able to hand him off to others.  We took him down to my MIL's for 10 days at 7 weeks old and it was like a vacation for me.  All I had to do was nurse him and then when I was done there was always someone else there to hold him while I showered, ate with two hands, drank coffee while it was still hot, etc . . .  it was bliss. 

Your little guy will have bad nights and you'll have bleary mornings.  Not always, but occasionally.  I make certain that guests know how to make themselves (and me) coffee and breakfast.  Show them where everything is when they arrive and stock the fridge with things for them to make.  That way you won't feel pulled to get up and feed them when you could be sleeping in with LO.

lukalover

Hala2010:

Llbrjb:

Every baby is different, and every new mom is different! 

Yes, you're right of course. I just wish I had a magic mirror that let me see into the future... I am a first time mom-to-be as well, which doesn't help. The thing is, we need to let the inlaws know before I deliver about how long they can stay over, so they can make travel plans. I don't want to tell them they can stay as long as they want (I foresee a 3 month visit that will drive me batty), but nor do I want to shortchange them and say only one week will do, if I am able to hold up better. The last time they came, it didn't go so well... and that was without a baby thrown into the mix. Oh well.

 

I'll just throw in that you will be tired in the best circumstances. You may be really irritable if you and the inlaws don't have an easy comfortable relationship. If you do let them stay with you I would suggest you let them help as much as they want and take that time to keep yourself in good spirits.

lp0

It definitely depends on the baby. My ds started sttn at 6 weeks so that definitely wouldn't be an issue for us. We've had some short term (long weekends) guests since ds was born. I think the biggest issue for me is an interruption in our schedule. Obviously with guests being in the house could throw off nap time, bath time, nursing, etc.

trackchik6

my 3 mo old does not sttn.  i have no energy to treat anyone as guests.  i take all the help i can get!