Ugh...not ok

Petunia844

Well last night an hour after I'd gone to bed my brother called...sil is in labor.  I totally kept it together while I was on the phone...then totally lost it.  Hardly slept at all last night.  This isn't fair.  Still don't know if it's a boy or girl...I'm worried if its a boy I'll lose it all over again.  I'm just so angry and jealous and it makes me so sad that this is how I feel when my niece or nephew is being born.  This just sucks.

fluttergirlmoonchild79

Oh Sweetie, I'm just so sorry you're going through this right now.  I think your reaction is completely normal for all of us.  I've lost it over acquaintances having babies so I could only imagine what it would be like to have a sibling having a baby.  I agree, it does suck.

{{{HUGS}}}

karebear57

(((Big huge hugs))) I am so sorry your feeling this way. It's normal though. I felt like that when my stepsis had her lil girl. My parents kept me updated and sent me a txt pic of her and her lil girl and I was so jealous! This was her first girl too.(((hugs)) and even more ((hugs))

jbranden12

I'm so sorry you're facing this right now. I'm thankful my only brother is a workaholic bachelor with no plans to have children for quite some time. I don't know how I would get through what you are. But don't be hard on yourself. Feeling this way doesn't mean you don't love your family. big (HUGS)

SJHodgson

I am so sorry that you have to go though this. I have 3 friends and  cousin who were all due around the same time as me, two of my friends and cousin already had their baby. It was so difficult to hear about their deliveries. My last friend is going to be induced this Friday or Monday. Friday was the day my husband and I were planning on scheduling our c-section, and Monday was my due date for my daughter Ava. As happy as I am for all of my friends and cousin, it hurts so much.

barbie92

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this! ((Huge Hugs))

blessedhope

I'm so sorry your going through this right now. Two of my SIL's just had babies and it was really, really hard. Don't feel bad for reacting this way. It's hard when my love for my nieces nad nephews are mixed with jealousy. I was thankful the baby that lives close to me was a girl. The other baby is a boy but they live a state over so I haven't had to see him. I totally understand you hoping it is not a boy. My SIL told me when her baby was born her older children said, "Maybe God made this baby a girl so it wouldn't be so hard on Aunt Megan." I thought that was so sweet that her children thought of me like that. I guess sometimes children can be the most understanding during times of grief.  

Petunia844

Well, they had the baby... everyone's doing well.  I'm so relieved that it's a girl... I didn't really realize how scared I was for a boy until I saw that her name was Natalie.  Now I'm just sitting here trying not to picture the amazing experience they're having bonding and loving on their brand new baby girl...

weddedwife

I'm sure you must've seen my post about a week ago about my friend who had her baby? They didn't know what they were having either, and it ended up being a boy. I was unprepared for how hard it would hit me. My other friend had her baby yesterday, and I knew it was going to be a girl, but it was so hard anyway. I sobbed both times. I hate that I had that reaction but what can I say? I can only imagine it's so much worse with a sibling.

Petunia844

weddedwife:

I'm sure you must've seen my post about a week ago about my friend who had her baby? They didn't know what they were having either, and it ended up being a boy. I was unprepared for how hard it would hit me. My other friend had her baby yesterday, and I knew it was going to be a girl, but it was so hard anyway. I sobbed both times. I hate that I had that reaction but what can I say? I can only imagine it's so much worse with a sibling.

That's honestly one of the hardest things for me...trying to forgive myself for being sad.  I just feel like "when did this become my life?? To sob when my niece is born?"