Anyone Else One and Done?

cuppaco

Due to the *serious* pregnancy complications followed by a life threatening postpartum infection, and throwing in an emergency c/s - I think we are 1 and done.

I will be 30 next month.  DH is 42, so his age also adds into the equation.  The complications scared me, DH, and our families so badly that my family is encouraging us to stop at one.  My OB is not sure that it would be a good idea either, and has recommended additional testing for me.  And honestly, I'm scared to do it again.  DH is an only child and liked it, I *wish* I was an only child, and financially we would be better off with having only one child.

Is anyone else 1 and done?  And if you don't mind sharing what are your reasons?

 

jenbelsan

We are one and done here.  I am 40, and DH is 48, between ages ( and. Risk factors with that) and finances, that's all we are having.  Sorry you had such a rough time! GL!

 

AwkwardBaby

I go back and forth with this one.  I am one of 4 (and a twin to boot), so I'm not sure how it would be to be sibling-less.  I was also secretly (and quite crazily) hoping for twins this pregnancy.  Kills two birds with one stone: only one pregnancy, twp babies, and the kids have an automatic friend!

 I was on bedrest for almost 11 weeks, and I just don't know how we would do that if I was on bedrest with another one and still had a toddler to take care of.

 If we do have another, we will be waiting at least 2 years in between, that is for sure!

Also, if you feel that you really want another child, but are uncertain about the whole pregnancy aspect you could always try adoption.  My twin sister is unable to have children, and I have been doing research with her about adoption, and there really are a ton of options out there!

mumegs

I've been thinking about it, I always thought I'd have two but the whole labor and delivery part is a little too fresh for me still. Plus I don't see how I could have a toddler running around right now, I'm exhausted as it is and sleeping when she sleeps has kind of saved me. We'll see I guess, I want to wait another couple years at least.

MsCatra

We might be.  We have said from the beginning that we think we might want to concentrate on just one child, I'm 32 and he's 37, and with just one we can afford for me to not work.  Plus, I had such an easy pregnancy and smooth delivery (didn't make it totally med-free, but made it epi-free, which was most important to me) I'm sure another one would be holy hell, lol.

onetxjewel

We are possibly one and done.  I have not enjoyed being pregnant at all! I was extremely sick for the first 4-5 months and now i'm extremely swollen and have developed PUPPS along with just being physically and emotionally miserable.  Plus now i'm really looking at the financial and time aspect (my husband and I both love our jobs which are very time consuming).  We'll see how we feel about it in a few years.  I'm an only child and was able to really do alot of things growing up...traveling, I had a car, my parents paid for my college, etc...my husband is the middle of 5 and didn't really get to experience alot growing up because of this.  We see the pros and cons of either way but I just can't see myself going through this again. 

erniebufflo

I guess we're two and done, since we had twins, but this will be my only pregnancy. I had major complications, developed postpartum cardiomyopathy and congestive heart failure and truly almost died. Any future pregnancy would be life threatening. My hubby is going to get a vasectomy.

Mamasaurus

Maybe?

My H wants to stop at one child, but he also has a very lazy attitude about BC, and it's not like I would ever abort a healthy fetus if we had an "oops" baby. I am also not totally convinced that he won't change his mind about having another one once this baby is a little older. Part of his decision about one and done is based on the idea that he doesn't really like babies, but that's based on other people's babies...once he meets HIS baby, he might get Baby Fever like a couple dads I know.

For my part, I am happy that I get this one since I was told to expect a lot of problems TTC. We only tried for one cycle before I got my BFP, which seems insanely lucky, especially since we had a loss before. I feel like if we tried again and nothing happened for a long time, or I had another loss, I might want to spare our family the emotional pain and appreciate that I get a child at all rather than obsessing about giving her a sibling. I would like her to have somebody in case something happens to me and H, but not enough to go through IVF or deal with a series of losses. On top of this, I have a number of health issues that have been mercifully non-problematic during this pregnancy, but if they get worse again later, it would be a strong deterrent against ever TTC again. I do not want to have to choose between affording health care for myself and affording health care for my child/ren.

I know we don't want more than two, no matter what. We agreed the only way we would ever have more than 2 is if we tried for #2 and had multiples.

danandbethg

99% sure we will be one and done. We are both 31. I got pulled from work at 35 weeks due to severe swelling and BP issues....and I am the one that works. I can't imagine if the issues had started earlier and I hadn't been able to work most of my pregnancy. So, only 1 income, not the easiest pregnancy plus we aren't 23 anymore.....probably 1 and done.

Beener0514

We may be. We had a difficult time getting pregnant (tried for 18 cycles and was one my 4th round of Clomid when it finally happened). I had a smooth pregnancy but labor and delivery was stressful with Emmy's heart rate dropping and getting stuck in the birth canal. She's absolutely perfect and I recovered well but I feel like we will be tempting fate if we try for another. I'm thinking we should just count our blessings that we already have.