4 year old doesn't want to wear diapers at night...

byrne15

but still wakes up with a soaked diaper every morning.

I am not sure what to do.  DS recently started asking to wear underwear to bed at night (even though he has never woken up dry).  We decided that we would put underwear on and see how it went.  When I went in to his room in the morning, he was sound asleep in a wet bed.  I woke him up and brought him to the bathroom (which of course he didn't have to use).  We talked about the difference in diapers and underwear and he said he still wanted to wear underwear to bed.  We tried the next night....same thing happened.

Since then he has been back in diapers and still has never woken up dry.  He keeps asking me to not wear diapers.  I tell him if he has a dry diaper, we can try underwear again.

What should I do?  Let him keep wetting the bed with underwear?  Stay in diapers????  Advice??

t-lou rosales

I would get rid of the diapers. Maybe you can try a sticker chart in his room...a dry bed means a sticker and a treat? My DS had about 3 accidents and has never had one since. If you keep switching him from underwear to diapers he can get confused.

AgrippaRidesAgain

If he is sleeping that soundly, he isn't ready to be diaperless. No amount of stickers are going to make him suddenly start waking up when he needs to pee. If you really wanted to work on it, perhaps keep him in diapers and start waking him to pee when you go to bed, and then in the morning before his normal wake up time. That way, his body starts getting accustomed to waking to pee? I know that if I wake DS early, he often has a dry pull up. I think he actually pees when he is dozing and not fully awake.

luvmagoldn

Do you mean diapers or pull ups?  One of my twins has been dry at night for about a year.  The other - not even close.  He sleeps so soundly that he just doesn't wake up - even if he is completely wet.

I bought night time pull ups for him.  They aren't Diego or Cars but have monster trucks on them - I think they are the Good Nites by Huggies.  They feel more like underwear to him and are very different from the ones his younger brother wears which was important since he does NOT want to have anything babyish.

You could try that and see if he feels better about it.  But I agree with the pp.  If your son sleeps that soundly I think stickers will frustrate him and perhaps delay the process even longer. 

Sawyerplus1

I agree with PP; No amount of sticker charts will encourage bladder control at night when he is clearly sleeping so soundly through night time accidents. I'd say he's not ready to drop the diapers yet.

But I would drop the term 'diaper' (or the actual diaper if that's what you're still using). It sounds like he wants to be a 'big boy', which is a good step, and calling them 'diapers' could be what he's rejecting, as opposed to the actual protection itself, kwim?  They make great night time 'undies' for kids with delayed night time control that feel and look more like real underwear. I'd switch to those and make up another name for them. When we PTd DS we switched him to pull ups for night time and consistently called them "night time underwear". 

howleyshell

Sawyerplus1:

I agree with PP; No amount of sticker charts will encourage bladder control at night when he is clearly sleeping so soundly through night time accidents. I'd say he's not ready to drop the diapers yet.

Ditto this.

I applaud the interest, though!

A compromise would be underwear under neath a pull up.   The child gets the underwear and Mom gets a minimized clean up routine.

Also - I recommend getting an ultimate crib sheet.  Perfect to lay across a mattress on top of the fitted sheet so you are minimizing laundry.

 

MallardDucky

I am just going to say it 4 years old is to old to be in diapers. He is prob. seeing all his friends in underwear but yet he still gets a diaper at night. To me a pull up is no different than a diaper if they do not have the skills.

You need to dive right into this.

1. Cut out all liquids at least 2 hours before bed

2. Start making him go to the potty at least 1 hour before bed

3. Have him go to the potty at bedtime.

4. Set an alarm for 2 hours after he goes to bed and get him up and take him to the potty

5. If he doesnt go 2 hours after set an alarm for Midnight, if he doesnt go try agian in 2 hours.

6. If he has an accident make him clean it up himself each and every time. This mean washing out his underwear, changing sheets (with a little help from you), putting on clean clothes, and putting the dirty in the laundry. 4 year olds are plently capable of doing this.

He needs to start setting his body to be able to wake up at night to go to the potty. By doing the above his body will start to recongize what needs to happen and he will start to go on his own. It sucks to do as a parent and loss of sleep is going to cause you to be cranky, but in the end the outcome is your ds not having accidents.

 Is your ds day trained?

Sharon&Paul

MallardDucky:

I am just going to say it 4 years old is to old to be in diapers. He is prob. seeing all his friends in underwear but yet he still gets a diaper at night. To me a pull up is no different than a diaper if they do not have the skills.

You need to dive right into this.

1. Cut out all liquids at least 2 hours before bed

2. Start making him go to the potty at least 1 hour before bed

3. Have him go to the potty at bedtime.

4. Set an alarm for 2 hours after he goes to bed and get him up and take him to the potty

5. If he doesnt go 2 hours after set an alarm for Midnight, if he doesnt go try agian in 2 hours.

6. If he has an accident make him clean it up himself each and every time. This mean washing out his underwear, changing sheets (with a little help from you), putting on clean clothes, and putting the dirty in the laundry. 4 year olds are plently capable of doing this.

He needs to start setting his body to be able to wake up at night to go to the potty. By doing the above his body will start to recongize what needs to happen and he will start to go on his own. It sucks to do as a parent and loss of sleep is going to cause you to be cranky, but in the end the outcome is your ds not having accidents.

 Is your ds day trained?

 

I could not disagree with this more. As a physician assistant who works in pediatrics there are many studies showing this is not an effective method. Bedwetting is considered normal development up to age 5. It occurs because the pituitary gland in the brain is immature and not release enough anti-diuretic hormone to stop urine production at night. We do not wet our beds at night because we do not produce urine while we sleep. Not because we wake ourselves up to pee.  You really need to just wait until their pituitary gland develops. Definitely do not punish a child for bedwetting. After the age of 5 we offer patients DDAVP nasal spray which is antidiuretic hormone in a nasal spray, but only if there is a social issue with the bedwetting. If there is no social issue than there is no need for treatment. Bedwetting is not a medical condition (well in the majority of cases).

You may consider using cloth training pants that would feel more like underwear for him, but provide the waterproof protection you need.

Snap-ez  Training pants are very similar to pull-ups and you can stuff them with as many inserts as you need for absorption.

 https://www.snap-ez.com/Shopping.html

shellybird101

how about undies with plastic pants over.  Then it would remind him he's wet but it would save on sheet washing.

 

MallardDucky

Sharon&Paul:

MallardDucky:

I am just going to say it 4 years old is to old to be in diapers. He is prob. seeing all his friends in underwear but yet he still gets a diaper at night. To me a pull up is no different than a diaper if they do not have the skills.

You need to dive right into this.

1. Cut out all liquids at least 2 hours before bed

2. Start making him go to the potty at least 1 hour before bed

3. Have him go to the potty at bedtime.

4. Set an alarm for 2 hours after he goes to bed and get him up and take him to the potty

5. If he doesnt go 2 hours after set an alarm for Midnight, if he doesnt go try agian in 2 hours.

6. If he has an accident make him clean it up himself each and every time. This mean washing out his underwear, changing sheets (with a little help from you), putting on clean clothes, and putting the dirty in the laundry. 4 year olds are plently capable of doing this.

He needs to start setting his body to be able to wake up at night to go to the potty. By doing the above his body will start to recongize what needs to happen and he will start to go on his own. It sucks to do as a parent and loss of sleep is going to cause you to be cranky, but in the end the outcome is your ds not having accidents.

 Is your ds day trained?

 

I could not disagree with this more. As a physician assistant who works in pediatrics there are many studies showing this is not an effective method. Bedwetting is considered normal development up to age 5. It occurs because the pituitary gland in the brain is immature and not release enough anti-diuretic hormone to stop urine production at night. We do not wet our beds at night because we do not produce urine while we sleep. Not because we wake ourselves up to pee.  You really need to just wait until their pituitary gland develops. Definitely do not punish a child for bedwetting. After the age of 5 we offer patients DDAVP nasal spray which is antidiuretic hormone in a nasal spray, but only if there is a social issue with the bedwetting. If there is no social issue than there is no need for treatment. Bedwetting is not a medical condition (well in the majority of cases).

You may consider using cloth training pants that would feel more like underwear for him, but provide the waterproof protection you need.

Snap-ez  Training pants are very similar to pull-ups and you can stuff them with as many inserts as you need for absorption.

 https://www.snap-ez.com/Shopping.html

I do not know where you got your information about not producing urine at night but that is not correct.(Hell I still get up in the middle of the night to go, as well as my ds1)  Basically it all boils down to the childs muscles being able to control the bladder.  When a child is in a deep sleep they do not feel the signals that let them know they have to go.   Many doctors to include our on Ped will tell a parent to limit liquids, and wake the child up a night. Also to have them help clean up.  Do not punish the child but make the responsible.

Also studys have shown that when a person is sleep deprived, or sleeping to soundly will make a person produce more unrine at night than in the day time.

ETA that DDAVP is no longer approved by the FDA to treat bedwetting issues.

CHI-06

We are going through the same thing.  We have been letting her wear underwear because she has been getting so upset over wearing pullups.  She wants to keep her bed dry SO bad and is visibly disappointed when she wets her bed.  We don't let her have any liquids after dinner, potty before bed and now we are waking her to go to the bathroom again before we go to bed.  There are still nights where she has accidents though...but waking her does help sometimes.  It is harder on us though.  For now this is how we are handling it...