Smacked by grief

tubbsy32

Yesterday I had to go shoe shopping with my mom, she was trying on shoes and I was just sitting there spacing out; next thing I know my eyes are full of tears and I just think..."wow, I can't believe my baby died. I can'y believe this is my life."

It's weird how sometimes this just sneaks up on me. You know what I mean? Of course I am always missing Jacob, but I thought i was having an ok day and then BAM! And then an hour later I had a panic attack in the middle of the mall and had to find an exit ASAP.

Ever feel somewhat "normal" and then get smacked with your grief unexpectedly? 

lrichmond86

So sorry you're feeling this way today.  It seems like every time I have a rough day it comes right after thinking, "wow... I'm doing pretty good lately."  Hugs.  Hoping for a better tomorrow for you!

JessicaRobb

lrichmond86:

So sorry you're feeling this way today.  It seems like every time I have a rough day it comes right after thinking, "wow... I'm doing pretty good lately."  Hugs.  Hoping for a better tomorrow for you!

Ditto.

I don't like this new life. I am still in shock that this is... Real. Never in a million years did I ever think I'd be here.

I am sorry you're having a rough time. 

Mandiemn

I'm so sorry that you are hurting. I had a smack on my way home from work tonight. My eyes welled up so much that I couldn't see to drive and had to pull over. I hate that this is our new reality. I keep waiting to wake up, or something. It all seems like a horrible nightmare.

My love and thoughts are with you. 

fluttergirlmoonchild79

I swear this happens to me all the time.  And I swear it's always right after I tell myself I'm doing alright.  The ones that sneak up on me, to me, are way worse than the times when I just know it's going to be tough.  {{HUGS}}

magdalina.h

At least once a week I get smacked with holy crap I'm in the group of babies who have passed.

agrobins1

All of the time!  The 21st of April would have been when Ava turned 5 mths.  I can be sitting at work going about my day and out of nowhere I can't stop crying or control my grief.  I have never in my life felt bi-polar until now.  (Sorry, I am not bi-polar and don't know how it is and I'm not trying to make light of it, just don't know any other way to explain).

To top it off, we have been trying since January and this month we used the ovulation predictor kit so I thought for sure we'd be pregnant.  Today AF came to visit...EARLY!  So that means I'm a mess today.

But...I want to wish everyone a Happy Friday!

nuttycoconut

I have felt that way many times, including today. I hate that it's so unexpected.  I had a panic attack in a convenience store with DH when we were buying crackers. Very random. I hope these "grief smacks" let up a lot for all of us over the next few months. That is a perfect way to describe it. I'm so sorry you are having a rough time.