GAH!

tessalu64

Ok. I just need someone to put my mind at ease because I am going crazy.

 So I was googling something along the lines of "is it ok to push while miscarrying?"

 What did I come across? Misdiagnosed miscarriages and how you shouldn't let a doctor "push" you to miscarry if you haven't done so naturally.

 We found out Friday our baby had no heartbeat, I was about 9 weeks along so I opted for the misoprostol before I got any further. (I didn't want to have a DNC and I didn't want to be too far along and bleed too much if I waited to do it naturally, not knowing when it would happen on its on.)

 So now I am FREAKING out that my miscarriage was misdiagnosed. I know it's crazy and probably so rare. Someone please tell me I didn't kill my baby by not being patient...please...

 (heartbeat at 6w5d was 92, 7w6d was 100, 9w2d NO heartbeat...was diagnosed with miscarriage and given my options.)

I'm a wreck right now.

ashleyl31

You didn't kill your baby. Big ((hugs)). This is rough, but you will make it through it.  

tessalu64

Thank you for responding when no one else would...I know I sound like a crazy person probably. I am just so devastated I don't know what to do with myself.

I feel like I never want to get out of bed or leave the house or talk to anyone ever again. I was coping ok yesterday but today has been awful. I guess it comes in waves.

dmgalley25

I am so sorry for your loss and I know exactly how you feel and you are not acting or sounding crazy. If it gives you any peace the HB's you mentioned were low. That is how they knew with mine too. I went on 3/27 and i was 5wks 6 days the hb was 88. I went a week later for a recheck and the hb was gone. I actually agreed to wait for the D&C til this Tuesday because i still felt pg and i didn't want to believe it was true. I bled a little the other day and nothing since but I now longer feel pg    I, like you, have done nothing but cry since i found out. I have not even been back to work yet because i just could not face it. I am hoping that after the D&C i will feel some closure.

Someone on here told me keep posting and I have been. maybe it will help you to.  I will pray for you to find some peace.

sweetiestar

i felt the same way, i miscarried when i was 11 weeks. When i went in for my 8 week appt their heartrates were perfect 188 for one and 192 of the other and they were measuring perfect in size. when went in with my sister for her appt and had a sneak peek of my babies and was told my babies had no heartbeat. she showed me where their hearts should be beating but there was nothing there, i had a D&C the following morning. People have asked me why i did it so fast, did they do an internal sono not just a sono on my belly did i have them check again before the D&C. i started to doubt myself, did i abort my babies, were they really gone..... But i know they were, i think its just natural. I miss them more than i ever thought i could. I feel like ill never be myself again, like ill always have this sadness. I am sorry for your loss 

jackiemary

I'm so sorry for you loss. I miscarried this weekend and am still a wreck as well. You didn't do anything wrong.

Durve2008

I am so sorry for your loss.  You did not kill the baby.  Something was wrong that was out of your control, and it was not your fault.  It there was a heartbeat, I am sure the doctor would have seen it.  It is not something that they evaluate lightly.  You did absolutely nothing wrong.   I know that it is really hard, but try not to blame yourself.  I had a miscarriage three weeks ago, and I am just starting to learn that I should probably not google too many things  It just brings up more stuff that I should not be thinking of.  

Be kind to yourself and try to heal- physically and mentally.