reading hunger cues in a colic/reflux baby?

twentyeightlegs

How do you read hunger cues in your colic/reflux baby? I'm having trouble telling the difference between "I'm hungry!" and "I'm screaming because I like to scream" or "I'm fussing because I like to fuss!"

She tongue thrusts a lot when she burping up acid (super sad) and it's not necessarily related to hunger and she puts her hands in her mouth when she's in scream mode (which is like 80% of her day). She doesn't do any lip smacking... 

I don't want to over fill her b/c that makes her spit up more, which makes her scream more (and by God, I cannot do that) but obviously I want to make sure she's not under-fed either. She's breast fed, FWIW.  

contourhands

I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone...I am having a hard time telling the differenc too.  My LO fussed all night and I went back and forth trying to figure out if he was still hungry or having refux.  This has got to get easier...right?

twentyeightlegs

God I hope so. This is miserable for all of us. I try to keep repeating "this will end one day" but when you're on hour 7 of screaming, well, it gets hard.

And you hear "oh, it will stop by the third month" HOW THE EFF IS THAT HELPFUL? Three months of non-stop screaming is a long effing time. 

 When I was pg, my only hope was to NOT have a colicky baby...  Guess I lost that one. 

StangJK13

I have to go by the clock since hunger cues are difficult to read in a colicky/gassy baby. If it has been at least 3 hours I will feed her. If it has only been 1 or 2 hours, I will try other efforts to comfort her first. I have noticed that what I think is her "hungry" cry is a lot softer/lower than her "I'm in pain" shrieking.

dayzee505

I am a long time lurker and really felt the need to respond since just a short few weeks ago I felt EXACTLY the same way and was totally overwhlemed and utterly confused! I will say like everyone does...it gets better, and usually much sooner than 3 months with colic, our little girl is 8 weeks old and I noticed a HUGE difference in her colic symptons reducing by 6 weeks or so and her reflux is so much better with diet changes and some medication.  This is at least our experience. 

Sometimes you will still get bad days or a bad evening but it does reduce so hang in there any way you can and continue to do what you can for your sanity and to comfort your LO.  I did find Happiest Baby on the Block techniques to really help with comforting and bringing our LO down to a more managable level and then I was better able to distinguish what could be going on (hunger, gas, cramping, relux etc.) At times I just try everything and anything even if it might casue some spit up.

I totally agree that going by the clock is the best way.  If it is 3 hours or close to I try and feed her and if it is less I attempt everything under the sun to comfort.  It is not easy and after going through it, you do feel like you can handle anything once you start to see light at the end of the tunnel.  Take it one day at a time.  I hope this ws slightly helpful.  Know you are not alone!!!!!

sherpa

I also wanted to tell you that you're not alone. My son was like this for 5 months. I followed my boobs and kept a 3 hour rule during the day 5 hours at night. Meaning, if he ate, even if he spit it all up right away and was still fussing and screaming, I wouldn't feed him again unless it had been 2-3 hours or if my breasts became tingly (I assumed that if they became tingly then it was time to feed regardless because they would only fill up based on his consumption anyway so if they filled more quickly than 3 hours then it was possibly because they didn't empty well enough when he did eat). His pedi said he could go 5 hours at night if he were sleeping that long but if he woke to feed him until he pulled away or fell asleep.

Hang in there Momma. I know how difficult it is but you are going to have a bright and wonderful child. My son made me miserable (we both were) for the first 5 months but man he is the coolest most loving and well adjusted kid I have ever had the pleasure to know.

 

JFH2010

I'm in the exact same boat, it's so frustrating. Meds are making a difference for us (Zantac plus an antacid as needed) so I feel more comfortable feeding on demand than before. But basically, like pps, I try to soothe in other ways, and if he just won't be soothed, I feed him. But he often eats every 1.5 hours, which seems excessive to me, but that seems to be his schedule. I tried making him wait longer, but now I'm convinced he really does get hungry that often. He also doesn't eat for very long at each feeding (usually less than 10 mins). I know how you feel - the last thing you want to do is over feed your baby and make the reflux worse, nor do you want to leave him hungry! At least we know it HAS to get better at some point.

And to the pp commenting on the "three months" thing - I'm getting that all the time from friends with kids, and it's making me crazy. Three months seems like an eternity when your baby's in pain. 

sherpa

Oh, also wanted to mention. We tried acid-reflux medications but they never did anything.  Warren never went more than 20 minutes without crying.  I learned in those 5 months that my son was allergic to a lot of foods. He grew out of them by the time he was 2 (all but peanuts) but that was part of what was making him so miserable. I eliminated dairy, peanuts, barley, wheat, honey, bananas, anything even mildly spicy, garlic, and cinnamon.  I only eliminated one at a time for 3 days - took notes on his reactions and moved on to the next food.  Turned out he was allergic to several of these.  Pedi always said he never heard anyone having allergic reactions to mom's breastmilk unless it was a dairy allergy.

With my DD, she is 2 months. I don't have any of the above items except dairy. I did have barley and she started spitting up and becoming fussy. Today I had peanut butter and she seems fine, gassy but I think that was the deviled eggs I had.

vszapp

I am right there with you! I worry so much about over/under feeding. So hard to tell when they are fussing, plus I read so many posts about happy and healthy babies that eat every 1-2 hours, so it certainly sounds like it's possible that they are hungry much sooner than 3 hours. I have never been able to wait that long (except when she's sleeping). I am really lucky if I get to 2 hours.

I am always encouraged when I hear about other babies that have gone through this and turned out OK. I worry that her development will suffer, since she doesn't spend much time looking at toys or frankly even listening to us due to fussing and crying. It is heartbreaking. But it does sound like most kids turn out just fine!

shouldbworkin

I went by the 2 hour rule with my colicky DS.  He was put down for a nap w/in 2 hours of waking and feedings happened before he went down for a nap.  I let him go as long as he could/wanted at night, but stuck to 2 hours between feeds/naps during the day.  This really helped avoid DS getting over tired.  If he got overtired, he was very difficult to settle down.  DS also slept sitting up for the first 3 mos b/c I couldn't put him down flat for 30 mins following a feeding.

KHD3341

are you breastfeeding?  I always thought you couldn't over feed a breast fed baby so I always offer the breast when I cant get DD to calm down using other methods.  During the day she often eats every 1.5 and she is latched for a long time.

I know she may just be pacifying, but I am ok with it because she is only 8 weeks old and I cant stand to hear her scream and I know that it wont be forever.

Also, our milk is a natural antacid so it makes their tummies feel better.

I really make sure I burp a lot though.  Even if it takes 15 mins to get a burp out (which it often does). 

Eveamlizya

My DD is 2 weeks and I'm almost positive that she's a bit colicky...only at night does she scream (as if she's in pain) and nothing seems to help...except one thing and I feel a tad bit horrible for doing it (the only thing that puts her right to sleep and keeps her asleep is for me to hold her in my arm against my chest reclined in my bed and sleep with her...I always pull the comforter away and put a pillow under my arm so she doesn't fall away from me...she'll sleep a good 4 hours at a time like this)  They say that breastfed babies don't get colic as easily as formula fed babies, but I'm starting to think that ALL babies get colic at some point for some period of time...it's a normal transitional thing...going from womb to outside world and digestion starting up too (their bodies go through a lot of changes in the first few months).  My mom said that I had colic horribly for 2 months when they first brought me home.  I will say that I am pretty lucky to have a baby that isn't screaming ALL the time and that at least SOMETHING does help her calm down...but it's very difficult to handle still.

Usually my LO "roots" for a nipple when she's hungry (she'll start sucking on my shoulder or chest or turn her head towards anything touching her face), but when she's screaming she doesn't do anything but scream.  Also, when she's like that she wants to use me as a pacifier a lot (she'll take the nipple but spit it and the milk out) and it's hard for me to go by the clock because she's so chaotic with feeding times.  My mom also told me that (granted this was 23 years ago) my pediatrician told her that when babies so young have the tummy ache they don't know the difference and associate that pain with hunger pain and want to eat more.  The best thing I can say is to hang in there and try different things each day...you'll find something that can calm them down at least a little...every baby is different...my best friend drinks peppermint tea and it gets in her milk and helps with her baby...my step SIL uses gripe water plus a warm shower (white noise and warmth and water on babies back helps)...my mom said my swing was the only thing that calmed me down.

Hang in there everyone...we can make it through.