introduction/omg

OxAMYxO

Hey ladies! This is my first post on this board. I'm about 31 weeks pregnant with my second daughter. First was an emergency csection (I ended up having HELPP..scary situation). Anyway, all things considered. I had a great csection experience. I have since switched OBs and my new one is encouraging me to consider VBAC. I cant even express how anxious the thought makes me...but I know I have to put my fears aside for my own safety. If you were in the sane boat, what got you to the point of being at peace with it? I could cry thinking about it. I'm so scared of having to actually PUSH this baby out of me..I know that sounds redic, but help me out here.

cchill01

I'm nervous too - but mine is more of failing again.  Because, if I can't push this baby out either, then I really suck at this whole birth thing

What convinces me to try are all the positives:

- shorter recovery.  just because one c-section was a breeze, doesn't mean the next one will be.

- being able to care for DD#1 sooner.  my first recovery was long.

- no surgery.  I'd rather avoid being cut open, if at all possible.

- lower risk on future children

- having a more natural experience.  my first was a 59 hour induction that was 100% medicine, 0% nature.  I'd like to change that ratio a bit, maybe 20:80

- prooving that I can do it.

Stick around the VBAC board.  We're due the same time, so we can cheer each other on.

OxAMYxO

You know what I think my problem is..my only birthing experience has been one where I was in zero control and the doctors did everything. I was on the verge of death, is essentially what they told me. And as nuts as this us, I'm scared to death of having to be in control. I should be thrilled that this pregnancy is going so well, nit fearing a "normal" birth...Christ, I am effed.

cchill01

No, that makes sense.  We're approaching this from two very different paths.  You were not in charge because it was life or death.  I was not in charge because modern medicine took over and I didn't take charge.  You left feeling saved.  I left feeling tricked and cheated. 

I think it's really normal to have tons of different emotions about pregnancy and birth.  But, my goal over the next 9 weeks is to enjoy the rest of this pregnancy and stay as calm as I can leading up to the big day.

OxAMYxO

Can I ask how you ended up having a csection? And yes, I'm working on the relaxtion thing..but that's something that doesn't come easily for this nutbag.

MAprincess

I always knew I wanted to VBAC after my c/s but my fears were more that I wasn't going to be able to.  My c/s wasn't an emergency like yours so I can imagine that you would have some anxiety over the delivery in general based on your last experience.

Definitely look at the positives.  Recovery, safety, taking care of your first child more easily.  I really love that my two children have very different birth stories.  I had to have faith that my body was going to do what it was supposed to. 

Talk to your OB about your fears.  They have heard everything and will help you work through it for a safe and relaxed delivery.

cchill01

OxAMYxO:

Can I ask how you ended up having a csection? And yes, I'm working on the relaxtion thing..but that's something that doesn't come easily for this nutbag.

I was 2 weeks late with zero progress.  After a 3 day induction, I finally got to 10cms.  The nurse I had was horrible, she kept making me lay down and just kept pumping up the pitocin (when she turned it down, my contractions spread out).  I pushed for a little while and the doctor I was working with said if I made a little more progress, he'd try helping me with some suction.  He went off duty and the new doctor whisked in and said "if you can't get the baby out in 20 minutes, we're doing a c-section."   I just totally gave up and I've been beating myself up over it ever since.

Cheerio B

I very, very much wanted a VBAC for the reasons others stated, shorter recovery, easier to take of DD. I never went in to labor with her and was terrified with the process, knowing when it would start, what would happen etc. I didn't end up with my VBAC but I did go into labor on my own and it was much less scary than I expected. If this is the route you take, know that you really can do it.

llib18

It is funny, but I'm scared either way....scared of having another section, scared of the unknown of a VBAC, scared every time I think they're going to tell me I can't try for one, and terrified of another emergency experience.