Missed Miscarriage Options?

tessalu64

Hey everyone...

 I'm new here and just found out today our baby has no heartbeat. We had a heartbeat at 6w5d of 92 and then at 7w6d of 100...today, 9w2d, no heartbeat at all

 I am trying to decide which option is best and would appreciate any and all advice. Between natural (which could take forever, I don't know if I can emotionally handle that), taking a pill to speed things along, or a DandC.

 Thank you

LisaC629

I'm sorry.  I found out the same thing yesterday.  My OB recommended at D&E, which I had today.  I think it was a better choice for me.  I don't know that I could handle waiting for it to happen naturally.  

holly321

I personally felt d&c was the best choice for me.  I was so far along, it would likely have been necessary if I tried for natural.  (pill was never an option)

I did not want to see anything.  My ob said it could still take weeks before it started.

For what it's worth, my d&c was a very easy process.

mhubbar5

I tried to wait things out. It was awful. I waited a week, and then gave in and took the cytotec. Two days later i ended up in the ER bleeding uncontrollably. Went through the worst experience of my life. Waited another two weeks only to find out I still hadn't passed everything and needed a D&C in the end. It dragged out for over a month. I wish i had just done the D&C to begin with. After three rounds of cytotec, two ER visits, 3 ultrasounds and a D&C it cost more to take care of my mc than we had saved up to pay to have a baby. depressing... The actual D&C was by far the easiest part of it all. Good luck with whichever you find is the best decision for you. 

AshJam25

Tessalu,

First I want to say that I am terribly sorry for your loss. I wish I could say I don't understand, but I do. I had a missed miscarriage in February after being pregnant for what I thought was 10 weeks, but on ultrasound was only a 6 week embryo. On my final ultrasound, I chose to go alone. My fiance had just started a new job and wasn't able to take off, and my mother offered to go with but I just wanted to be independent from needing my mom with me. I went there thinking everything would be fine. I was wrong. I too found out my baby had no heartbeat and the doctor left me in the exam room alone for several minutes, while I sobbed. He gave me the options of allowing nature to take its coures, taking misoprostal to induce a miscarriage, or scheduling a d&c. I too had recently started a new job, so I didn't have insurance (excellent timing to be pregnant). I opted for the misoprostal, thinking I would take some inexpensive pills, bleed, and be done with it by the weekend. Once I found out my baby was dead, I just wanted it out of me so I could move on. I would never choose misoprostal again. The cramping was pretty bad, but the bleeding was far worse than every explained to me. I was not prepared for it at all. It got to a point where I was really getting worried and went to the ER. I was ok, but was overall emotionally scarred and physically drained. I hope I never have to face that decision again, but if I do, I would choose the d&c. I know I definitely wouldn't wait it out because I know it would emotionally destroy me. It's been 2 months and I still am not fully together and I was barely even pregnant. It's really hard at times. I had to go back in for a recheck ultrasound after the miscarriage to make sure everything was out. The worst part was sitting in the waiting room with a bunch of obviously pregnant happy moms-to-be. We weren't even trying to get pregnant; it just happened. Now that I've experienced it, I want to try again.

Ultimately, you have to do what's best for you. There are risks and complications with each option. I wish you the best. Keep your chin up. We'll all get through this together.

gbby3m

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I'm in the process of waiting out naturally right now, and just wanted to share why I chose to do that.  

I had a blighted ovum, and never developed a fetus.  The doctor estimated that it stopped growing around 6wk 0d, with gestational sac measuring less than 20mm.

I'm sure your doctor has explained to you the risks of all options: D&C rarely but sometimes can cause infection or adhesion; natural miscarriage can be quite painful and can cause blood loss.  Because I was not very far along, doctor was not very concerned about the severity of the natural miscarriage (she said as a rule of thumb for her, she uses 7weeks as a cut off).  D&C is still an option for me, but I decided to wait out for a few weeks.  My doctor is also monitoring my HCG level to make sure the numbers are lowering, in the meantime.

I think you are strong and brave for facing the reality and for trying to make the best decision you can for yourself.  Good luck.  

BravoBravo

I had a mm/c with a blighted ovum.  I should have been around 9 weeks along but there was no baby.  There was no signs that I was going to m/c soon and with my husband being deployed I decided that a d&c was the best option.  My mom flew in to help care with DS and I had the procedure.  I had an easy recovery, no cramping and very little spotting.  However, there was no fetal tissue found and they thought that maybe it was a pseudo-sac and I had an ectopic because my hcg was high.  After lots of blood work, exams, and an u/s they discovered that they sac was still present.  I had another d&c on Wednesday and the recovery has been the same.  Hopefully this time they got the tissue. 

 

Good luck with your decision.

Dandelion321

I'm so sorry for your loss. I decided to have a D&E.  My decision was based on experiences of friends who have had the procedure, and also friends who struggled with having a natural miscarriage. Now that it is physically over, I think that I chose the best option for me.  I do not remember anything after having the anesthesia administered.  I did not bleed much afterwards, only spotting still.  I did have strange stomach pains and bloating, which are getting better.  Personally, I know that I would have struggled with waiting for it to begin naturally.  Knowing that our baby had no heartbeat and having that on my mind, I wanted to let my emotional healing begin as soon as possible.  Good luck with your choice.

tessalu64

Thank you all so much for your advice and support. I ended up decided to use the misoprostol. My sister in law is an ob nurse and recommended it, told me she would chose that option herself if the situation arose. I actually am going through it right now as I write this, and no, it is not fun, but honestly, we couldn't afford the D&C right now. Our insurance is pretty awful

 Now I'm wondering, does anyone know if use of misoprostol or D&C can affect future fertility? I guess what is done is done, but I can't find anything on the topic and I'm curious. DH and I plan to start trying again as soon as possible.

tmp-830496250005441

When I took mistoprostol, I asked my OB the same thing and also did my own research. It doesn't seem to affect future fertility or increase the risk of miscarriage in the future. Just thought I'd give you some comfort there.

 I'm so sorry for what you've been through. I've been there and am still walking through it 2 months later. *hugs*