pee accidents during temper tantrums

mistresscox

DD is successfully potty trained and doing incredibly well with it.  The only accidents she has are during temper tantrums.  We do the "Love and Logic" approach in our house which is basically if you can't behave nicely you go to your room until you can.  So when she is having a "moment" I put her in her room and she is not allowed to come out until she is calm and can talk/behave nicely.  Usually we don't have to do this much-just the threat of it stops the behavior-but the last week or so she has been incredibly difficult (we have reached the terrible twos!) so she has gone to "bedroom time" several times.  

At least once a day when she has bedroom time (it's been 1-2 times per day the last week) she pees herself and I'm getting really frustrated.  Yesterday I tried taking her to the potty on the way to bedroom time but she proceeded to scream in my ear and hit me while I held her on the potty and she didn't go.  Followed by an accident in her room.  I'm so frustrated by the behavior as it is that I can barely contain myself when it comes to cleaning up her accident afterwards and I'm finding that my anger is really growing.  (Please rest assured I would never hit/abuse/hurt my child despite how angry I get, but I'm finding it harder and harder to walk away and calm down.)  

Sorry for the long rant, but I'm really at my wits end here and I'm just hoping someone has some advice for how I can prevent/avoid the accidents during temper tantrums and time-outs.  I'm getting sick of dealing with a screaming toddler followed immediately by peed on carpets and clothes...... 

Pier1girl

Been there... today actually.  DD peed on me and the floor during a tantrum.  Obviously I have no advice to give, just sorry this is happening to you.  

celiabwatson

I'm sorry! 

I wonder if she doesn't know what to do when she has to go but is supposed to be in her room. With all that emotion it's probably difficult for her to express that she has to go, and she can't calm down quick enough so there's an accident. Maybe try putting a little potty in her room so if she does realize she has to go she can use that instead of trying to hold it until she calms down.

I'm no expert, but it's worth a try. 

mistresscox

I did try putting a diaper on her once-she promptly took it off and peed on the floor.    

I like the idea of putting the potty in there with her though.  I hadn't thought of that actually and I think it would help.  I know it's just because of all the emotion and I don't think it's "intentional" (i.e. I'm mad at mommy so I'm going to pee and make a mess) and she is sort of ashamed when it happens so I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but it's just getting really annoying.  I think the potty in the room may be our best bet!  Thanks!