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Two Under 2
Tantrums
My 18 month son has started throwing the worst tantrums since the arrival of his little sister a week and a half ago. These are all out on the floor screaming to no end tantrums that are sparked by the most insignificant things. The latest one this evening lasted 45 minutes until he finally fell asleep on daddy's lap. He huffed and puffed to the end, though. These tantrums are truly inconsolable and really frustrating to me and my husband since we just don't know what to do. Putting him in his room to cry it out is all that we've been able to do, but he is a little on the young side (I think) to truly comprehend the "time out". Is this just a phase that anyone else can comment on and/or give some pointers on how to handle? Also, on the day of arrival home with Little Sis, we all came down with a GI bug that put us all out for 72 hours to add more stress to our little guy's system. I am feeling so guilty for throwing his whole world upside down right now.
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Re: Tantrums
My son was sick last month for three days and he wasn't getting his usual amount (or quality) of sleep. It took almost a week for him to get "caught up" on sleep, and he started having ridiculous tantrums, too. I didn't make the connection between the illness and the tantrums until they disappeared after his sleeping got back to normal.
I don't know if this could be at least part of what is causing your son's tantrums???
DS is almost 20 months and he started throwing crazy tantrums a couple of months ago and it is almost always triggered by hunger/exhaustion.
He just has a much shorter temper when he's a little tired or hungry (just like adults) and so little things that would normally frustrate him a bit make him go absolutely nuts.
With DD being 3 weeks old now, it's tough to remember to anticipate his needs a little better so that she isn't breastfeeding when he gets hungry or tired, but that is really what I need to do. Make sure he's got a snack ready and that I put him down for a nap as soon as he gets tired instead of putting it off because I want to feed DD first, things like that. I think a lot of that really comes with time and experience. I can't say I've got it "figured out" but I'm in the process of finding the right things that work for us.
You are not alone. We are going through almost the exact same thing right now. DD#1 is 19 months old and DD#2 is 3 weeks old now.
About a week before the baby was born K started having the worst tantrums in the afternoons.. which progressed to all day events once the baby was born. My mom and MIL have taken her for a few days at a time to give her a break from everything here and give her time to calm down and be the center of attention for a bit. But once DH and I are around again its meltdown central all the time again. The screaming, crying, anger, aggression.. its taking its toll and just kills me because she just doesnt understand whats going on.
Time out was a major fail.. either it didnt effect her - or it sent her into complete breakdown mode and the only way to calm her down was a bath and bedtime. Spanking just made things worse. Taking her outside works when you've got two people.. but when I'm by myself with her its much easier said than done. It takes me 20 minutes to pack them both up and go outside and by that time the meltdown is over. So I understand your pain..
A few days ago around 6pm I just decided to put her to bed because she'd literally been crying all day long. She seriously went down without a fight. was almost ready for it. So we decided to change up the schedule.
We were on a pretty relaxed schedule before and everything was all over the place with the baby settling into the picture.. but now we've begun - bathtime in the morning so she's calm before lunchtime.. after lunchtime she goes down for a nap - which she's usually ready for and since she's only taking one nap she sleeps from 1-3 hours.
After nap we have outside time..(play in the yard or a walk around the block) then dinner at 5pm.. and bedtime between 6pm and 7pm.
we're on our third day of this and she has only thrown two or three fits and no big meltdowns.. (knock on wood) .. I really hope this is the ticket and we're on the road to recovery. I want my happy child back!
I really wish you luck and hope maybe this helped. We just tried acclimating the schedule to her and what she specifically needs rather than her to us and our chaos with the new baby.