Foster child: Normal toddler behavior or not?

butterflygrooves

Owl has been a good eater since she came to us but we've been having very stressful mealtimes with her lately.  She has always had an issue with people watching her eat (watching her do anything really) and we had to teach her how to use a fork and spoon when she came to us 4 months ago but other than that she's been good with food.

She has been refusing to feed herself lately and barely opens her mouth when we try to feed her, sometimes she will eat but we have to prompt every bite with "Owl, take a bite/eat your food.  She also does what I call eating air, she has no food on her utensil but puts it to her mouth as if she is taking a bite, then she chews, she will do this repeatedly to avoid eating.  She has also been taking a bite then chewing for minutes, not swallowing, she sometimes keeps the chewed food stored at the back of her mouth while she chews the next bite, leading to gagging and sometimes vomiting.

She is 22 months, 21lbs, 31.5", has lost a couple of lbs since coming to us.  She isn't active, preferring to stand/sit in one place while watching everyone else, and she doesn't speak/communicate at all so we don't know if she's hungry  or not. 

I've never dealt with food issues like this before so I'm not sure if it's age appropriate or if it's more than that.  Give me some guidance please. 

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butterflygrooves

marshmallowevening:

I have seen kids do things like this to show they have something they are in control of. However, I would definitely follow up with a pediatrician because there could be a medical reason for this that she may need treatment for. I would say the fact that she isn't speaking or communicatingneeds to be checked out, anyway. 

She has seen the pediatrician for speech and we have a referral pending, actually a bunch of them, we've been waiting for her case and insurance to transfer to our county before the referrals can go through.  She saw the Dr a couple weeks ago and seems to have nothing wrong that they can find, maybe the mental health specialist can help when the referral goes through?

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EratMama

GOD, OWL BREAKS MY HEART.  

 

IF YOY LEFT A PLATE OF FOOD FOR HER OUT ALl DAY, DO YOU THINK SHE WOULD NIBbLE ?  EaT ON HER TErMS ?

 

I WILL KEEP TJINKING AND SORRY AHAIN ABOUT THE CRAZY FORMATTING. 

butterflygrooves

marshmallowevening:

I would say definitely follow up with speech as well as ask the pediatrician for a referral to a medical specialist (swallow study, test for GERD, etc). I had a kid on my caseload who had a swallowing disorder and even did therapy just for that. I think his was linked to sensory problems. If they don't find anything medically, it could very well be behavioral.

 I know she doesn't have a problem swallowing, each week at her visit with mom she will eat 6 chicken nuggets, fries, apple slices, a lunchable, an adult size orange juice, and a candy bar by herself without a fight.

Your initial comment about it being a control thing sounds like it might fit the bill but I will still ask for a referral to a specialist to be sure.  Hopefully everything gets transferred soon so we can follow up on all the services she needs. 

butterflygrooves

EratMama:

GOD, OWL BREAKS MY HEART.  

 

IF YOY LEFT A PLATE OF FOOD FOR HER OUT ALl DAY, DO YOU THINK SHE WOULD NIBbLE ?  EaT ON HER TErMS ?

 

I WILL KEEP TJINKING AND SORRY AHAIN ABOUT THE CRAZY FORMATTING. 

I've tried to leave food and sippy cups out for her but she won't touch them unless someone hands them to her and even then she just carries it around, not eating or drinking unless someone prompts every bite or drink for her.  It's been sad to watch her lately, she has some big demons to fight. 

mamatojts

FYI - she could be teething. 2 year molars should be coming in or started coming in.

Obviously she's been doing just fine with eating until recently. Don't start reading into things that may not be there. So to answer your question - its normal toddler behavior.

As foster parents, we always want to read into things they do or stop doing. I've learned to stop doing that. 

butterflygrooves

mamatojts:

FYI - she could be teething. 2 year molars should be coming in or started coming in.

Obviously she's been doing just fine with eating until recently. Don't start reading into things that may not be there. So to answer your question - its normal toddler behavior.

As foster parents, we always want to read into things they do or stop doing. I've learned to stop doing that. 

Thank you, I hadn't even thought about teething! 

mamatojts

DS2 was late chronologically with his molars (didn't get them until Jan/Feb ) but with age adjustment, he was right on time with them. He's my really good eater and he slowed down considerably when they started coming in.

jacksjerseygirl

It is very common for toddlers to go through periods of eating very little to eating tons. I still have to prompt and encourage DS to take a bite lol

 

Ovbiousky you young toddler has other issues going on too. I would continue positive reinforcement and encouragement. I would also make sure given the weight issues that your not feeding her adult diet (low fat, low cal) meals she needs healthy fat and higher intake of calories from nutritious food. Doesn't mean you should make awhole other meal - but perhaps adding cheese can even add extra flavor, fat and calories to her meal.