Meet the baby party

overtonhayes

Just a couple of questions:

- I've got the impression from this board that a meet the baby party is not about gifts, is that right? If so, I'm guessing it would be ok to have both a shower and a meet the baby party? And I'm guessing that unlike a shower, you throw your own?

- For anyone who's had one, any tips? From the point of view of not overwhelming/frightening the baby, how soon is too soon? How many is too many? How long is too long? Any specific activities to avoid (example, loud music, although I know that's obvious)? Etc. I don't know a whole lot about babies but I'm guessing that suddenly having a houseful of 30 noisy people would be pretty terrifying for a newborn!

TIA.

Edit: If I did have a shower and a MTBP, would I need to specify on the invitations that it's a no-gifts thing? Even though I know I'm not having the party for gifts, I don't want people to think that.

FWIW, I'm defining a 'meet the baby party' as having our closest friends come over, all together, and just hang out with us (and, obviously, meet the baby!). I'd provide food and drinks (some alcoholic, but no one would be getting drunk). No games or gifts. No particular theme.

mommabear17

I think regardless of what you say in the invites, having a meet the baby party after you've already shower seems like you are fishing for gifts again.  Most people would never dream of coming to a party without some kind of gift.

I have never heard of a meet the baby party outside of the Bump.

From a practical standpoint, you never know what will happen for you and baby during birth - if there are complications or health issues.  Planning a party is stressful and tiring, and you're already going to be stressed and tired.  I also, personally, would not want my baby in an atmosphere like that very soon after birth.  I was nervous enough when took my first to Easter Mass two weeks before her 2 month shots.

overtonhayes

Hmmm... Good point(s). So how about this: no 'formal' party, as in no invitations. We just invite people by phone/email, and mention we're having a little get together with our nearest and dearest. We wait until baby's immune system is strong enough for her to be out and about, or around strangers. I think I read somewhere - maybe WTEWYE - that this is as soon as two weeks?

EastCoastBride

overtonhayes:

So how about this: no 'formal' party, as in no invitations. We just invite people by phone/email, and mention we're having a little get together with our nearest and dearest.

This is basically what we did.  I too had never heard of a Meet the Baby party until here!  We invited people to come over the weekend after we came home.  Very small, very simple.  It really wasn't even a party - it was just a "Hey- if you want to meet DS, we'll be up for visitors from __ to __". 

And that's my advice too- set a specific start and end time.  You will most likely be tired and not yourself.  Don't set yourself up for an indefinite period.  Open up your home for 2 or 3 hours only. 

mommabear17

overtonhayes:

Hmmm... Good point(s). So how about this: no 'formal' party, as in no invitations. We just invite people by phone/email, and mention we're having a little get together with our nearest and dearest. We wait until baby's immune system is strong enough for her to be out and about, or around strangers. I think I read somewhere - maybe WTEWYE - that this is as soon as two weeks?

 Chance are very good that you are not going to feel like entertaining 2 weeks post partum.  I would say that something very casual is a good idea, but I wouldn't plan ahead too much. Maybe have an idea of food, drink and who you want to invite, but don't invite anyone or put too much effort into it until you see how you and baby are doing, and what you feel comfortable with.

EastCoastBride

mommabear17:

Chance are very good that you are not going to feel like entertaining 2 weeks post partum.  I would say that something very casual is a good idea, but I wouldn't plan ahead too much. Maybe have an idea of food, drink and who you want to invite, but don't invite anyone or put too much effort into it until you see how you and baby are doing, and what you feel comfortable with.

I agree with this too.  DS was literally 4 or 5 days old when we let people come over - which is a part of the tired aspect.   And this is also why it wasn't a "party" in any sense of the word.  Luckily all our visitors kind of 'got it' and I don't think anyone stayed longer than an hour.

Clearly, we offered them something to drink,  but we didn't have food out.  This was very much meant to be about meeting DS, catching up w/ us for a bit, then leaving. 

K&V&K

I had a MTBP for my 2nd baby. 2 year prior we had a wedding shower, a wedding & a baby shower(for 1st baby) all within 8 months, I felt as though people had been more than generous with gifts for us. + when I had my 1st everyone wanted to see the baby, so for 6 weeks, there were family/friends over almost every evening & weekend. I loved seeing them all & sharing my new baby with them, but having to tidy the house + cook/ or have something to serve overwhelming. So 2nd time around my parents hosted a "Baby Party", 1week after she was born. They had it at their house & took care of the food, essentially all I had to do was show up! No cleaning before & after! No disrupting our "routine" for weeks on end of visitors. So everyone got to meet the baby on the same day & I didn't have any of the work. Some brought gifts others not. This time around, baby #3, they offered to do it again, & my husband & I are grateful & excited.

Aleja0918

EastCoastBride:

overtonhayes:

So how about this: no 'formal' party, as in no invitations. We just invite people by phone/email, and mention we're having a little get together with our nearest and dearest.

This is basically what we did.  I too had never heard of a Meet the Baby party until here!  We invited people to come over the weekend after we came home.  Very small, very simple.  It really wasn't even a party - it was just a "Hey- if you want to meet DS, we'll be up for visitors from __ to __". 

And that's my advice too- set a specific start and end time.  You will most likely be tired and not yourself.  Don't set yourself up for an indefinite period.  Open up your home for 2 or 3 hours only. 

This is exactly what we're doing this Saturday. Very low key with just a few of our close friends. Everyone's been very respectful of letting us have time to adjust so I just called them and let them know if they wanted to meet DS, we'd be happy to see them anytime between 1-4 p.m.

overtonhayes

Congratulations on your little one, Aleja0918!

Aleja0918

overtonhayes:

Congratulations on your little one, Aleja0918!

Thank you!

Lou&Beth

I've been thinking about something similar to this. We will probably buy some hamburgers & hot dogs close to my due date, freeze them, and when we are ready, just call our friends to come over for a little BBQ. I'm a FTM so I really have no idea what things will be like after delivery and I don't want to plan anything in advance. Most of our friends have children, so I feel like they will be respectful with keeping their visit on the short side.

BallSox

If I ever have another kid, I'll likely just let people know when I'm feeling up to having visitors (it'll have to be another c/s as my hospital doesn't do vbacs).  Thankfully my friends/family are all understanding of the c/s recovery (they were amazing the first time) so I don't think I'll have to fight them off at the door the moment we come home. 

As I always do for guests, if anyone came over, I'd have food/drinks for them, but the thought of throwing a party with invites and catered party-style food, etc.... nms.

ChristyML

I won't be doing a meet the baby party for a few reasons.

One, I'll be having my baby in October, so I don't think I'll be having or going to any parties until my baby is old enough to have a good immune system.

Two, October is close enough to Thanksgiving and Christmas that our families will still get to see the baby when it's still pretty tiny and new (if we go to our families houses for the holidays).

Three, I think if anyone wanted to come see my baby badly enough, they would ask when a good time to come by would be. I would probably set a date and time with them, and have some cookies or veggie trays and drinks for them, but no big dinner.