what questions should i be asking?! — The Bump

what questions should i be asking?!

we were matched this week. we meet the bparents and their attorney on friday. what questions should we be asking? I have no idea. I feel like there are some pretty standard questions and my fried brain just cannot think of them. any help would be wildly appreciated! thanks! 

*~PAIF/SAIF welcome and encouraged!~*

Re: what questions should i be asking?!

  • I don't have any suggestions but I wanted to say, congrats on the match!    
    TTC since December '08
    Dx PCOS and Endo
    lap to remove cysts turned into full laparotomy Nov. '09
    4 cycles of clomid=BFN
    1 clomid iui = BFN
    new doctor and a new plan
    august '10 - began 6 months of lupron depot
    IVF our only option for biological baby
    May '11 Decided we are moving on to adoption!
  • Talk to them about how they're doing.  Ask the expectant mom how she's feeling.  Ask them about themselves - likes, hobbies, favorite things, etc.  Ask them about their families.  Ask them about the level of openness they are looking for and what that looks like for them.

    I would take photos with you - maybe even make a small album that they can keep.  Fill it with pictures of you and your dh, plus pics of you with family and friends.  I made a mini scrapbook and gave that to our dd's birthmom at our first meeting.  I think she really liked it, plus it gave us lots to talk about.


    <a target="_blank" title="http://wendy-steve-andg3.blogspot.com/" href="http://wendy-steve-andg3.blogspot.com/">Our Adoption Blog</a>
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  • Oh, and CONGRATS!!!!
    <a target="_blank" title="http://wendy-steve-andg3.blogspot.com/" href="http://wendy-steve-andg3.blogspot.com/">Our Adoption Blog</a>
  • Congratulations, this is oh so exciting!!!

    We asked about her interests, her hopes after adoption, her family, how the pregnancy has gone. Just be friendly and be yourselves!

    Don't forget that she'll be just as nervous, or even more than you will be. Our agency made sure to tell us that meeting adoptive parents can be intimidating. You're in a great place in your life and she most likely is not. Just be friendly, loving and honest.

    It will all go great, you will be awesome!!! Prayers coming your way, I can't wait to hear how it goes!!!!! 

    image Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Everyone has great suggestions. Just be natural. At the first meeting with my daughters adoptive parents they gave me a photo book (baby theme) and I filled it (later. I was 3 months pregnant when we met) with pics of DD's first days in the hospital. We talked about family and life in general.. we talked about names a little.. I don't think we really talked about The Adoption much.. just kept it light hearted. I would suggest asking about what they expect in terms of openness though. Congrats!!
    BM to Kenzie 9/1/04 --- Married 1/22/09 --- Me 27 - DH 25 --- TTC our first since April 2010 Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • thanks ladies, these suggestions really helped! we are so excited and nervous! 

    *~PAIF/SAIF welcome and encouraged!~*

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