Violated while pumping at work...

brittas

I am a teacher and pump in my classroom. I cover all the windows and put a sign on my door that says, "Do not disturb." The sign is placed OVER the lock, so in order to unlock my door, you have to move the sign. You'd think that would be enough. Well apparently it isn't. While pumping, I heard someone messing with the lock. I began yelling, "Don't come in! Don't come in!" The fire marshal steps in the doorway and I yell, "I'm pumping!!!!" He mumbles something along the lines of I'm sorry, and doesn't leave right away! He stood there, in the doorway and quickly inspected my room to make sure it isn't in violation of the fire code! 

I am so pissed. The law says I can express milk in a place other than a bathroom AWAY from the public! The school should have let them know what was going on. I told my principal about the incident, and he pretty much just brushed it off saying he can't really do anything about it. I asked if I could go pump at home for the rest of the year (I literally live 1 minute away from school) and he said he would get back to me.

I want to file a complaint with the school and the fire department. Am I taking it too far? I was so upset today.

 

Sorry to just pop in here with my rant... I don't know where else to go with this! 

jeffsjayme

I think the guy should've left once he saw what was going on, but he didn't do it intentionally.  I think you're making a little thing into a big thing.

EastCoastBride

jeffsjayme:

I think the guy should've left once he saw what was going on, but he didn't do it intentionally.  I think you're making a little thing into a big thing.

I agree.  It really sucks, but I think it was truly a mistake.  Was he staring at you while he stood there, or did he see you then immediately avert his eyes and look around the room?  It sounds like it was the latter from the way you describe it. 

 

iluvmylab

I'm sorry, that sucks. I pump in my classroom too with the exact same set up. It does sound like a honest mistake though. We are always notified when they are coming so we can check to make sure our classrooms are up to code. I wonder if they are supposed to tell us....FWIW, I almost got walked in on too so now I wear a nursing cover just in case.

Lena122

I would absolutely file a complaint with the fire department if I were you. There is NO reason why he should not have immediately turned around and left unless the building was on fire. I'd also make a more specific sign if you have to continue pumping in that room. "Do Not Disturb" just wouldnt cut it for me if I was sitting there with my chest exposed. Maybe "Keep out: pumping in progress" or something along those lines.

EastCoastBride

I wanted to add - I'd have been really upset too.  I can't imagine having someone walk in on me.

But it's your use of the word "violated" that is making me pause.  He definitely didn't come over and grab you, and it doesn't sound like he stared at you either. 

And I would imagine that the fire marshal was shocked and didn't know what to do.  While to us it seems clear that the obvious thing is to leave, he may have just been so flustered that he just wasn't thinking right.

I think your principal needs to take this more seriously and he needs to be more careful in the future w/ visits from outsiders to the school. 

BostonGayGal

I think it was an honest mistake and that you would be wrong to take it further. His job/time is more important than your privacy. I think you should wear a nursing cover in the future just in case. 

Jelliebean1982

I think it's taking it a little too far.  I pump in my classroom too and just pump with a cover on.  Everyone who pumps is going to get walked in on at some time or another.  I was walked in on by the maintenance guy who was trying to repair my vacuum cleaner.  I just told him it wasn't a good time and asked him to leave.  It took him a minute to figure out what I meant but he has small kids at home too so it was NBD.  No one's eyes were permanently scarred. 

 I think the best part about the fire marshal is that you never have to see him again.  

erbear

I think you're taking it a little far. It's not like he was just coming in to hang out; he as doing his job and probably didn't really get what was happening. I would not file a complaint.

FWIW, I'm a teacher and I've been walked in on a number of times pumping. It's more embarrassing for them than for me.

esperanza123

I'm just a lurking here...

I'd suggest you press your principal to allow you to go home to pump if you're worried about something like this happening again. I live 5 mins away from school and my principal okay'ed it.  

luvmagoldn

I think violated is not the appropriate word choice.  I pumped in a locked room that only other nursing mothers had keys for and still was walked in on at least once.  I always had a nursing cover on just in case.  I would suggest that going forward.

To me, going home to pump would be a PITA even if I lived next door to the school. Teachers I know say they barely have time to pee during the day so packing up, walking to the car, driving home, pumping, driving back, looking for a parking space and getting back to the classroom seems more stressful to me than just coverin up in case it happens again. 

 

luvmagoldn

I forgot to add that the fire marshall was inspecting a school where children are obviously present.  I would think he would have access to all parts of the building including locked rooms.  What if a school was trying to hide some major violation by locking the door?  Just saying that he has an important job to do and should not have been expected to skip your room because it was an inconvenience to you.  Could it have been handled better?  Yes.  I it worth getting up in arms about?  I don't think so.

MammaBear81

BostonGayGal:

I think it was an honest mistake and that you would be wrong to take it further. His job/time is more important than your privacy. I think you should wear a nursing cover in the future just in case. 

I agree with this.  I pump in an empty office (that no one has any reason to go into) with a giant sign that says do not disturb.  Even so I turn by back to the door while I pump and have a nursing cover because you never know who's not paying attention!

katie4253

I think you are overreacting and I also think it's a little weird that anyone who pumps outside their home wouldn't use a cover.  Get a cheap cover and call it a day.  IMO it is inevitable that you'll get walked in on if you pump.  Fact of life. 

I don't think your principal should let you go off-site to pump either.  It sets a precedence which could cause problems for him/her in the future with other pumping moms.  

Honestly, from reading your post, I almost wonder if the fire marshal even knew what pumping was.  I know a lot of men, and even some women, who wouldn't have known what it was until they had kids.  

rodiesmum

our admin engineer did this to me. i raised the issue with my boss.

 

cwm11985

errrrr I think you need to just let it go.  He had a job to do, and your school is counting on him to find any hazards.  Sure, he should have turned around and walked out but he was probably feeling really confused about why the door was locked to begin with.  Just bring a cover and keep on keepin on.

michanyc

katie4253:

I think you are overreacting and I also think it's a little weird that anyone who pumps outside their home wouldn't use a cover.  Get a cheap cover and call it a day.  IMO it is inevitable that you'll get walked in on if you pump.  Fact of life. 

I don't think your principal should let you go off-site to pump either.  It sets a precedence which could cause problems for him/her in the future with other pumping moms.  

Honestly, from reading your post, I almost wonder if the fire marshal even knew what pumping was.  I know a lot of men, and even some women, who wouldn't have known what it was until they had kids.  

 

 

ditto- I'm sure he didn't even know what you were doing! He probably was flustered and didn't know what to do.  I wouldnt push it, its not like he is going to be a repeat offender.  I would just ask that the principal to notify them and you next time they are doing an inspection so you can plan to not be pumping when they come through.  I agree wear a cover- it will give you peace of mind.  I know I don't pump as much if I am stressed that I am going to get walked in on!

shouldbworkin

EastCoastBride:

I wanted to add - I'd have been really upset too.  I can't imagine having someone walk in on me.

But it's your use of the word "violated" that is making me pause.  He definitely didn't come over and grab you, and it doesn't sound like he stared at you either. 

And I would imagine that the fire marshal was shocked and didn't know what to do.  While to us it seems clear that the obvious thing is to leave, he may have just been so flustered that he just wasn't thinking right.

I think your principal needs to take this more seriously and he needs to be more careful in the future w/ visits from outsiders to the school. 

Ditto.  And, your school should have sent out a notice that the fire marshall would be there from Xam to X pm to give everyone warning, if possible.  Sometimes they don't even know when they're showing up. 

pumpkinwife07

I think you are taking it a bit too far as well. I can understand if you feel a bit embarassed, but you weren't assaulted. I'd also like to point out as a firefighter/ fire marshal, he's likely to have seen boobs before. I'm sure he feels bad.

notquiteblushing

I'm really sorry this happened to you but he was just doing his job and it was an honest mistake. 

jnealet

I would ask the principal for a heads up if he knows the fire marshal is coming or for a text if he knows he's in the building unexpectantly.  I'm sure he has little to say about the fire marshall accessing every room, so there probably wasn't much he could have done to stop him.

I agree with you about the initial reaction of feeling violated, I would feel that way too if anyone else but another pumper walked into the mom's room while I was pumping. 

And FWIW, I haven't been walked in on while pumping.  And I don't wear a cover - it just seems like a huge hassle to me.

I do often think about how unsexy pumping is and how no one really wants to see it going on.  I think that's what helpes me through the whole feeling exposed thing.

Why Cant I Find an Acceptable Username

"Violated" is the EXACT RIGHT WORD!!!  I had a horrible violation at work today as well.  To say that you are over-reacting is complete crap.  To say that "violated" is too strong a word because no one touched you is complete crap.  You should be given privacy, that is the LAW.  And if someone made a mistake, IMMEDIATE privacy after a mistake is what you DESERVE.  No long pause, no glance about, what a JERK.  And anyone who tells you that you are incorrect to feel VIOLATED is full of crap.  Today I had some nosey woman pull back my curtain and stick her head in, feeling free to totally inspect the premises, just because I had accidentally left my keys on the bathroom sink, and she decided that it was absolutely necessary to return them to me, three feet away, IN PERSON, at that moment, despite me verbally requesting that I be left alone and that she leave the keys where she found them.  I was disgusted and humiliated and trying to figure out how to report her and keep her from harassing me and others in the near future.  Then she left the curtain OPEN after leaving the bathroom, I had to stop and get up and close the curtain.  Such total BS.  I cannot even CONCEIVE of violating someone like that.  Yours is worse than mine in most ways.  Mine sucks because I had the opportunity to ASK her to leave me alone, she could HEAR the pump, how could she NOT have known exactly what I was doing, especially when the curtain was CLOSED and the sign says, "Lactation Area Occupied, Privacy Please".  WHY did she have to open the curtain, and LOOK????  After I said, thanks, I'm sure my keys are fine, I can get them later?"  Violated is the word.  Instantly giving you privacy and saying OH MY GOD I AM SO SORRY might be OK.  But even a momentary pause, and any glances around, that is just so WRONG.  Sorry that happened to you.  I would work to enforce respect, and confront the guy even...I am still trying to figure out what I can do, too.  Sigh.  Would rather not have to deal with any of this, if only people could be decent.    

Why Cant I Find an Acceptable Username

I just wrote a big long post and got some crap that it was a duplicate post.

Why Cant I Find an Acceptable Username

PS Would you please let us know what, if anything, you decide to do?  I'm going to report my incident, just trying to figure out to whom.  And expecting it won't go anywhere.  But I don't feel that it would be fair to myself, or those that follow me, to just let it go.  Totally unnecessary to  have been treated that way, and people need to know that it's NOT OK!

Valerie120408

I would file a complaint - it is not acceptable for the fire marshal to come in when you were asking him not to come in and he should have left immediately when you said you were pumping. I would deal directly with the fire chief - file a written complaint.