How far should I push this (Mat. Leave Related)?

RobinaUMCP

Hi Ladies,

I usually post on other boards, but lurk here often. I am sure you will have some good advice for me.

I am 24 weeks pregnant with my first and just got back word on my maternity leave request. Some background: I work for a small (less than 10 people) association. We offer 12 weeks of FMLA, but it would include any accumulated sick and vacation time before the unpaid portion would begin. Originally, I wanted to use my accrued vacation and sick leave, on top of the FMLA being offered. So instead of 12 weeks total, I was hoping to be home with LO for 16 weeks total with 12 weeks being essentionally unpaid. The good news is that my association is going to pay for my health insurance while I am out on leave. This was a nice bonus and kind of buffers the disapponitment with the amount of leave I can take.

In our employee handbook, it states I can ask for my leave to be extended and I am thinking of doing this. For some reason, it is important to me to be home for 16 weeks before putting DD in daycare. So my question is how much would you push for the additional 4 weeks? Do you think I should just suck it up and accept the 12 weeks (which is better than nothing, 6 weeks, 8 weeks, etc.)? Are there any other negotiating tactics I might be able to use (working from home for last 4 weeks, temporary part-time schedule, etc.)? Are these 4 weeks really a big deal?

I really think it important to be home with baby for 4 months, but maybe I am being unrealistic about my options here. Any advice is appreciated. TIA!

QueSrah

FMLA is just the job protection part, whether paid or unpaid, so it's completely typical for a company to expect you use up your paid leave at the beginning of your time off and to return by the end of your FMLA period rather than taking off 12 weeks unpaid and then using up the vacation time you had accrued before the baby came.  (Is your office in DC?  Even though FMLA doesn't sound like it legally applies to where you work, you could try to get them to offer up the 16 weeks DC has in its FMLA law.)

I took off 14.5 weeks, thinking I *should* use the 16 weeks I got because I work in DC.  OMG, was staying at home not for me.  I should have come back after 12.  Seriously.  I probably am not typical, but it's possible you may not be clamoring for those four weeks once you're actually home with the baby.

SouthFloridaMommy

Well, you could push for it, but after 12 weeks, you no longer have the job protection that FMLA is intended to provide. Any extension of your leave would be at the employers discretion, and wouldn't really be afforded the protections of FMLA.  Or at least, I don't think you would.  Plus, like the pp said, you might not even like being home that long (I didn't like it with my first, but loved being home after DD2 was born).

I'm a little curious as to how your job even offers FMLA leave though. FMLA is typically restricted to companies over 50 employees and you said that yours is less than 10 employees.  It does cover federal empoyees though, is that how it applies?  Or is it a local thing like the pp suggested?

sunflwra

Companies that are not mandated to follow FMLA law by virtue of their size, etc can still choose to offer that same protection- their just not required to do so. My company is covered under FMLA so I know that I had the 12 week job protection but I really didn't want LO to be in DC until she was 4 months so I asked for it and luckily, I got it. I also asked to return to work part time for the first month to help in the transition. It sounds like you've asked for 16 weeks and it's been rejected, so I'm not sure of any possibility of negotiation, but maybe you can discuss the part time return schedule and at least that means your LO won't be in DC full time until they are 4 months old? It's not ideal, but better than what you've currently been approved for. Most companies are not going to ok you working from home unless you commit to having in home childcare as you can't really commit to working an 8 hour day when you have a child to care for.  GL in whatever you decide!

Julia_JJ

I'd rather save my negotiating for all the time off you'll have to take off after going back to work - sick days (if your kid is in daycare - you'll have them), doctor's appointments, etc. As an employer, I'd feel taken advantage of if an employee pushed for a month of extra leave and then was often in and out after coming back to work.

RobinaUMCP

Thanks for the responses all. Julia, thanks for the excellent point. We thought about this, and DH will have about 3 weeks of leave saved up for doctor's appts./sick days for LO through the rest of the year. We knew going in that all my leave will be depleted regardless of how many weeks I take.

EastCoastBride

Yeah - you need to be clear on what FMLA is.  It's great that your company offers it, but it's job protection only.  It's not actual leave. 

Most companies- you have to use your paid leave in conjunction w/ FMLA.  Not paid leave THEN FMLA. 

So if they offer you extended leave, that's great.  But it's not FMLA and your job won't technically be protected for that extra time (but for the fact they follow FMLA in the first place w/ only 10 employees, I doubt they'd fire you anyhow!). 

daisy662

What a lot of pp's are not realizing here is that your company is not required to offer you FMLA if it only employs 10 people which means your job is NOT protected when you take time off for mat leave even if they approve you to take time off.

 So, in my eyes, you are fortunate you are getting anything. You can certainly ask for an additional 4 weeks (and I would if that is important to you) however, I wouldn't "push for it" as you call it - seeing as though you aren't entitled to anything under the law and your company is going above and beyond by giving you anything.

Strunella

Apparently, it's typical to use up any time (vacation/sick) before your unpaid leave kicks in.  I didn't realize this either.  After my 6 weeks of STD, I wanted to use 2 weeks of vacation and take the remaining 5 weeks unpaid so that I could save my remaining 2 weeks of vacation for things that might come up when I returned to work.  They wouldn't let me do that, so I was forced to use up all of my vacation time with just the last 3 weeks being unpaid.  (I took 13 weeks ML.)

I don't think you have to "push" for anything.  I would simply ask if there is any flexibility for you once you return to work.  You don't get if you don't ask.  It sounds like they are rather generous, and they might be amenable to an extra few weeks or some kind of PT or flex schedule.  On the other hand, with only 10 employees, your absence might be greatly missed and they might be struggling without you, counting down the days until you return.

Everybody is different regarding how long they want to stay home.  I would have taken 16 weeks if I thought it was an option. 

jlaOK

There is nothing magical between 12 and 16 weeks off, but if it is important to you and your handbook says that time is negotiable then I'd go ahead and ask for it. The worst they can say is no.

mairanellis

RobinaUMCP:

Thanks for the responses all. Julia, thanks for the excellent point. We thought about this, and DH will have about 3 weeks of leave saved up for doctor's appts./sick days for LO through the rest of the year. We knew going in that all my leave will be depleted regardless of how many weeks I take.

This is what I thought too, until DS started daycare, caught a stomach bug and gave it to both DH and I.  We were ALL home sick for days.  DH was supposed to be the one to stay home with DS when he got sick, since most of my time has been used.  Plans changed when DH wasn't physically able to take care of DS because they were both sick at the same time, then I came down with what they had after.

As a PP said, I would probably just take the 12 weeks and then see about any unpaid time you'll have to take in the first year for illnesses, dr appts, etc.

EastCoastBride

daisy662:

What a lot of pp's are not realizing here is that your company is not required to offer you FMLA if it only employs 10 people which means your job is NOT protected when you take time off for mat leave even if they approve you to take time off.

I realize this- but some companies will choose for themselves to follow FMLA guidelines anyhow.  I'm making an assumption that this is what she means.  She could simply be mistaking FMLA for general "maternity leave", but I'm going off what she wrote.

My old company - even if an employee was there for less than a year, it still protected her job for her.  Companies CAN choose to to this if they want.

Clearly, legally, they could still go against this - but I would hope if they tell their employees they are protected, they'll honor that!

everam01

Your company, though not required by law, by policy states that you have 12 weeks protection similar to FMLA (including insurance coverage, just like FMLA).

If it states that you can negotiate additional time off, I would ask for it if it is important to you. However, if they turn you down I would not fight for it since it is not required of them and they may need your services. 

In most circumstances, vacation, sick, etc leave can be used during your 12 week protection in order to stay on pay status.

RoxyLynn

Certainly you can ask.  But since you are over 10% of their workforce they may have a legitimate logistical reason for not providing the extension.

hoping4sticky

I know people who have done this and had no problem. I also know that for me, coming back at 4 months would have been much better. By then I would have been more ready and we had a big set back with the 4 month wakeful - besides the first month, that was the worse month we had, it was tough.

The longer you are out though the tougher it is. Other people are covering your work, and if you are gone too long and not missed, that does not bode well for your future. Would PT be an option? You could try and negotiate a few months of PT. I went back PT and working mostly from home and it is great.

RobinaUMCP

Thanks so much for all the responses. So, so helpful. I will chat with my boss today or tomorrow to see what, if any, flexibility I might have regarding the last 4 weeks. But I will also go into the conversation knowing that I am getting a pretty good deal as it is. Also, to clarify, my company offers FMLA - not "general" maternity leave. They are not required to do so, but follow the guidelines anyway. I had no idea how lucky I was in that regard.

waTracy

I was lucky because I'm a teacher and had my daughter in November. Already planned days off like Thanksgiving and Winter Break and Presidents Day and such that I didn't have to count towards my FMLA time. And then I was supposed to go back to work before Spring Break, but I talked to HR and they agreed it would be a smoother transition for students if I just waited till after break. I was able to be out for 5.5 months. That being said, as others have stated, FMLA protects your job. You have to get a sense of those in HR and if they are willing to work with you. It's up to them, and I've learned it's all based on their demeanors. It seems already like they are kind and generous so I don't think it would hurt to ask. 

Mrs.0428

I didn't see this posted in the responses (though I did some skimming) and thought it was worth noting since your OP stated your company was continuing benefits while you are out. Some companies (mine included) will cover your benefits while you are out on paid STD or using vacation/sick time.  However if you take leave without pay you are responsible for paying for your benefits.  If I was taking LWOP I would have had to write a check for the benefits costs before going out on leave.  Just something else to think about.