DS doesn't eat
CrocusPocus
member
I don't know what to do about my 2 yo's refusal to eat. He just never eats any food. We offer him tons of different foods several times a day and he just ignores them. He backs away from anything I hold out to him in my hand or on a spoon/fork, and just refuses to pick up anything we put in front of him on a plate. He also doesn't use a spoon or fork no matter how much we try to give him one and show him how to use one - he just plays with them. He wants to drink whole milk all day. I guess we need to stop offering him milk but I'm scared he'll starve himself.
He has big issues with texture and any chunks in food. Last night he showed interest in some ice cream I was eating, so I fed him a few spoonfuls. On maybe the third bite he got a chocolate chip that I had somehow missed, and that was that. He made a face, spit out the chip, and walked away, refusing to even consider taking another bite. And this is ice cream!!! A treat!!! Not broccoli or anything! His behavioral therapist said eating is what she's going to work on next but that makes me feel like a horrible mother. Someone else has to teach my child to eat? Ugh I don't even know what I'm asking for with this post, I just had to get it out. Anyone have any similar experiences?
Re: DS doesn't eat
Our 2yr olds are pretty close in age (mine is a couple months older then yours). Both of my kids have aversions to eating anything that does not look familiar to them. DS1 is NT (neurotypical) and DS2 is SN (special needs). With DS1 I feel it is completely behavioral. With DS2 I/we (therapist and my opinion) feel some of it is behavioral. DS2 did have a texture thing at one point. DS1 has an oversensitive gag reflex.
Don't feel bad about someone else teaching your child to eat. DS2's feeding therapist is teaching him and really you are teaching him too! We have had to teach DS2 how to chew his food and we are currently working on getting him to use his upper lip to clear food from a fork and spoon. He also does not use silverware all the time. Sometimes he wants to and sometimes he just wants you to feed him.
As for the food, just keep trying. Every therapist I've ever worked with has said not to make a big deal out of it and if they try it, great, and if not, great. One thing that we do with DS2 if he is really against eating something is that he needs to touch it. Once he touches it, in the future we'll ask him to kiss it (just put it to his lips). He doesn't have to actually eat it. Then it goes bye-bye. If he touches it or kisses it he gets a lot of praise from the therapist and from me.
Ok, first and foremost, you're not a horrible mother. Period!
Second, I think a lot of kids have these types of issues. When we were "shopping around" for an ABA center we went to one where the kids were making something to eat - it was 2 parts fun 2 parts therapy because some of the kids had serious food issues. They were making some sort of carrot thing and 1 child started getting visibly upset just at the mere sight of the carrot. Another kid wouldn't go near the finished product because he only ate pureed things, not chopped. And on a personal note, I'm a texture person too. If it's mushy - I won't eat it, lol. I won't even eat cereal w/ milk because of the texture. And my boss won't eat food hotter than room temperature. He just won't. So don't feel too bad. Look at it this way. Moms of NT kids have to battle it alone when it comes to what their kids will and won't eat - we get help! My DS will eat anything that lets itself be eaten - provided it's not too hot ... or peas. :-)
{{hugs}} good luck!
My DS has very mild CP and never took a bottle well (he much preferred breastfeeding and just wouldn't drink for the most part when I was gone for work). He did okay with purees but didn't progress from there without the help of a ST that specialized in feeding and even saw a Multi-disciplinary feeding team, he had these services from about 8 months old for the next year. I think the biggest reason he qualified was the refusing to drink. Anyhow, it really helped and I don't know what we would have done without their frequent guidance, reinforcement and support. It is SO stressful. It seems like he could benefit from more than just a BT helping him progress to eating solids. I am sorry this is so hard and stressful, it will eventually get better. I hope you are able to get the help he needs. Let me know if you have any questions, jcrab23 at yahoo dot com.