Intro
Hi....I don't know why I haven't visited before! My son has a speech delay that EI decided was possibly related to fine motor skills. So my son gets 3x a week speech sessions and 2x per week OT sessions and started the process almost two years ago (but just began OT 4 months ago). I've been struggling a lot with the transition process to get his preschool services. He'll be 3 next month and I've found the evaluations very over-analytical and one of them started off on a negative note like (oh, I heard he gets distracted easily, etc.). The others were fine. In addition, his current preschool teacher never told me any of her concerns until after the evaluation process during the official scheduled parent-teacher conference. She had sent the evaluators a couple of comments that raised red flags including lack of eye contact with her (he gives me eye contact) and being distracted during circle time. So, I was caught off guard when the psychologist who evaluated him brought this up. Its been a rough month but we'll end it with our IEP meeting and I hope to get him exactly the services he needs without him being labeled falsely. That is my worst fear with what was brought up to me.
I guess I've just been looking to connect with other moms in the same boat. My closest friends are supportive but their kids are not receiving any services.
I do have a question, I suppose. I spoke with his teacher about being more open with and she seemed someone receptive but I don't know if she "got" that it was a problem to not tell me befre. But she did agree to be more open with me. I suppose they can't win because some parents might not want to hear it. My husband thinks we should enroll him at this school next year because he's happy and has a lot of physical stimulation, which he needs. This is unless they recommend a special preschool. I am not so sure and have been actively looking at other preschools. If you were me, what would you do? I'd love any feedback.
Re: Intro
Hi, Welcome. Your situation sounds a lot like mine at the start - speech leading to OT. See what the evaluators say, and if he qualifies for services, accept them. The special ed preschool has been great for my son (almost 4) and for us as a family.
I'm not sure what you mean by "over analytical" but I understand that the evals and reports can be hard to digest.
As for the current preschool teacher - I think you are probably right on with your assesment of her being unsure and then unsure of how to approach you. Although, a preschool teacher with any kind of experience would probably have been in this sutation before. I'd just make it a point to proactively make contact with her more or even set up a progress report system so you are more in sync. If you are otherwise happy w/ the school, teachers, director and he's doing well there then thats good.
Good Luck to you.
That is great advice. I feel a little better about the situation and his current school. I guess the way it happened was just poor timing. I think scheduling small sessions to communicate is a great idea.
When I say analytical, I mean that my son wouldn't have to be going through this if it weren't for the delay and you know how there's so many questions etc. I haven't seen the evals yet but it's just the process. There's that part of me that still doesn't want to be in this position and just go to school and get basic reports/report cards. I hope that makes sense. During his first eval, the psychologist was cajoling him into her office and he went to check out a drinking fountain and she made the comment about being easily distracted and a part of me was thinking; "yes he's here but this may very well be regular 2-year-old behavior." It was her first comment about him and her second was "So, he gets easily distracted during circle time?" But then it got better and I grew to feel more comfortable with her.
It's just so hard...I can't wait till Tuesday when I have my evaluation meeting and I'll get more answers. I didn't think it would be this way but I guess we all react differently. And I don't know how to handle like my mom and my instincts. When I was talking to her about the teacher situation, she spent a long time saying how friendly, etc. he is and he's not autistic. It's my instinct that he's not but that he certainly needs more help but I'll cross the bridge of instincts verses what they say when that comes. And, like you said, I'd make an appointment with a developmental pedi.
Thank you for answering my questions and letting me vent. I'm glad to be a part of this board.
yeah, I was actually thinking about that scale yesterday..remembering the stages of dealing with things but couldn't remember the model. And that would make sense...I mean it's not like I lost a parent but it's something to deal with...a sense of unfairness and concern for my son, etc. I find myself getting annoyed at the littlest things and was wondering what is all this anger inside of me.
I also woke up realizing hey this isn't a perfect world. Many parents have issues to deal with...my good friend's son is speaking well yet he has an immune deficiency...so how fun is that to deal with? I'm sure she's going through the same emotions. You have those parents who present perfect pictures but who knows what the truth is and they may have easy kids but other problems. Life has challenges.
As a parent, I think I just sort of need to pick up my bootstraps and deal with what I need to. I think my mom wonders in the back of her mind why I'm doing all of this...but it's exactly what you said. It's for my son.
Thanks so much for your advice and insight.