Could you be home with your spouse every day?

JenninMA

I'm a SAHM, which I enjoy for the most part. But, my husband works from home a lot- it seems to be about three days a week and it is driving me out of my mind. He's in corporate sales and has to go out to meetings at times but much of his job can be done through conference calls or online. When he's home he doesn't help at all with the house or kids although not having any commute gives him a good amount of free time. I keep encouraging him to go into the corporate office- which is about 25 mins away, to work, but he prefers being at home. I need my space. I can't handle being with my husband all the time. But, maybe I'm being unreasonable b/c I know plenty of women struggle with the opposite problem- having a husband who is deployed or who works really long hours away from home. But, I'm wondering if most people would enjoy being home everyday with their spouse?

justEK

Hell no. I'm a SAHM and I love Mondays. I get to send everyone away and get time alone. He tries to make his own routine when we already have one the kids are used to. Then he doesn't get why everyone is so whiny.

cbidt*sgirl

I have no problem being with my spouse for days on end when we are on vacation - but for normal everyday life...NO WAY.  He chooses the strangest things to battle the kids on and it drives me crazy.  And i feel like he competes for my attention with the kids.  I'd love to spend time alone with my husband, but home with kids - it's easier on my own.

surprise3rd

My husband works at home 90% of the time and it works great for us.  I also work from home very part time, and our DD is still home most days, so if I have a conference call or have to get something done, we tag team her.  He has had many many lunch time tea parties.  As far as housework he is not very helpful, when it comes to the dishes, daily pick ups, etc.  He does do all the laundry, but does that on Sundays.  Overall it works great for us, some times he mentions getting a job that would take him out of the house 9-5 and I beg him not to.  I like having him around.

jsugrin

I could no problem.  The only problem I'd see with DH working from home would be getting the kids to understand that they couldn't bother him but I'll take any extra time with him home I could get.

JenninMA

cbidt*sgirl:

I have no problem being with my spouse for days on end when we are on vacation - but for normal everyday life...NO WAY.  He chooses the strangest things to battle the kids on and it drives me crazy.  And i feel like he competes for my attention with the kids.  I'd love to spend time alone with my husband, but home with kids - it's easier on my own.

 I have this exact problem too- he'll get all worked up about something and get mad at the kids and I have to deal with the fall-out. And he'll be annoyed if he's on a call and they are making noise. I always feel like "Where should I take them- this is their house! Can I take them into the corporate office for a while so it's quiet for you??" Argh. It is driving me insane.

meglew

justEK:

Hell no. I'm a SAHM and I love Mondays. I get to send everyone away and get time alone. He tries to make his own routine when we already have one the kids are used to. Then he doesn't get why everyone is so whiny.

THIS TIMES A MILLION!  I love my DH to pieces, but DD and I have a routine that works great for us and weekends just kind of throw a kink in things.  My MIL and I often talk about how Monday is our favorite day of the week.  DD doesn't even go to school of Mondays (just half days on Tues and Thurs), but her and I get into our little groove and it is so nice.

just.a.lurker

I'm a sahm and DH is a teacher, so we have summers and other school breaks together.  There are moments when I'd rather he was at work, but for the most part we have a blast.  Maybe it would be different if he was at home because he was working at home, I could see that being more annoying.  

gracendantho26

justEK:

Hell no. I'm a SAHM and I love Mondays. I get to send everyone away and get time alone. He tries to make his own routine when we already have one the kids are used to. Then he doesn't get why everyone is so whiny.

Big ol' ditto!

superslug

I'm a Sahm and my DH works from home and has for about 4 years. I like it for the most part, but I don't think it's for every one. I keep busy during the week so it's really not that bad. I just wish he would ge out more for his sake. 

beachbum1980

JenninMA:

I'm a SAHM, which I enjoy for the most part. But, my husband works from home a lot- it seems to be about three days a week and it is driving me out of my mind. He's in corporate sales and has to go out to meetings at times but much of his job can be done through conference calls or online. When he's home he doesn't help at all with the house or kids although not having any commute gives him a good amount of free time. I keep encouraging him to go into the corporate office- which is about 25 mins away, to work, but he prefers being at home. I need my space. I can't handle being with my husband all the time. But, maybe I'm being unreasonable b/c I know plenty of women struggle with the opposite problem- having a husband who is deployed or who works really long hours away from home. But, I'm wondering if most people would enjoy being home everyday with their spouse?

Well it sounds like you think he could help out more and he doesn't so yeh, i would find that very frustrating too. Have you addressed that with him yet? Why doesn't he help? I would start making "honey do" lists for him probably if I thought he wasn't pulling his weight and have a little talk. Maybe he can set more specific hours when he works and then when he's done, he takes the kids or helps you more. And maybe pick one day a week where you leave him with the kids and you can go out for some alone time, get your nails done, go to the gym, etc. I think you would then feel much better about the situation.

good luck! 

veloelle

Ah, no. I love my DH dearly, but F no. There is good reason spouses don't work together! Also, I'd Say that about anyone, my BFF, my family, etc. usually you can't be around the same person 24/7.

kcisthebombdotcom

I'm an "absence makes the heart grow fonder" kind of girl. I don't find too much time with DH outside of vacations enjoyable. We tend to get on each others nerves more. If he doesn't get out of the house more, I would. The weather is nice now so pack a lunch and take the kids to the park every afternoon.

Sunflower7777

DH's job is actually based out of a different state than we live in, so it's either extreme for us. He's either completely out of the house 4 days of the week, or he's home all week, working out of his home office in the basement. 

He's been home for 2 weeks, which has been nice. However there can be a fine line when we cross over to that sketchy area of being around each other too much all day. We're starting to argue over who gets what leftovers for lunch, silly little things that happen when you are bouncing off each other all the time. A little space will be nice come Monday!!  

dsmithplus2

If your H is busy working from home, I wouldn't be bothered that he wasn't helping with LOs... I could handle my H working from home a few days a week, we love being together, but I guess its not the same for everyone - don't get me wrong, I love having my free time all alone throughout the week, but I'd love to get a few days where he was home more than just at dinner time and until the next morning.

Maybe you should sit down and talk with him about how you feel with him being home...? It wouldn't hurt anything.

peekaboo716

DH worked from home for my mat leaves, and parts of it were great, and parts not so great. It made me realize that being at home with him working and 24/7 is nice in short doses with end dates in sight.

jlw2505

I work from home right now most of the time and it drives me nuts on the days that my husband is home.  If he is working as well, its not an issue really - I am in my home office and he sets up shop in the family room.  It is rare that he is home and not working.  If he is home and working from home, why would you expect him to be helping you with the kids and house stuff during his working hours?  I get being annoyed that he is not helping more during non working hours though.  DH is off for a day in 2 weeks and I know he is going to drive me nuts unless he takes advantage of the day to do some much needed chores but I have a feeling he will take the day to chill on the couch all day which would be fine if I was not in the next room working!  DH and I would drive each other nuts if we were home together all the time, we do fine on week long vacations and things like that but we both have our set routines for when we are working and such.

jsmith1012

My parents own a business. Me my DH, DS, mother, father, grandmother, and cousin all work together more or less every day. It gets stressful at times, but I wouldn't change it. I get to bring my DS to work everyday, and my DH doesn't have to miss anything that DS does

p1nklemonade

hell no.  it's enough being with him after work and on weekends.

karen6784

DH and I work from home and we work together!  It works out well for the most part.  We have worked together for 10 years. 

bubu

This is funny to me because I told my DH recently if we spend more than a whole day together we start bickering a little bit. We only spend one full day together because we both work full time and I get excited if we get to spend a full two days or more together. I love spending time with him but for some reason we end up getting on each others nerves a little.

DandelionMom

It bugs me when we just stay home on weekends.  I could not handle in the house every day. 

melmax

I've gotten more used to it over the past 2 years. MH sold his business a few years ago, and he was home A LOT. It was a big change for me, having him home all the time during the day. I liked Mondays, getting the house organized again, getting back in my groove, having alone time, etc. so that took some time getting used to.  Now, I'm used to him being home a lot, although he's usually out of the house every day 8-noon, so that's a nice break.

sparklenshine_89

KC_13:

I'm an "absence makes the heart grow fonder" kind of girl.

Me too. I've experienced both. Sometimes I only see my DH once a month. And other times he's home all the time. There's pros and cons to both.

camillaandcarson

Yes.  We get along extremely well and he helps around the house regardless of working at home or not. 

RockyMtnMama

No, I love my husband, but we can't work together too well.  I think though, that if he's working from home that he probably won't pitch in too much with the kids or anything during the day, but you're right that maybe he can knock off a little earlier to jump back into the family mode since he's getting a 50-min break from his commute. 

kickypants

My H works from home, and up until this past summer, I also worked part-time from home. I went back full-time in August, so now I'm at my office all day, but I liked it, for the most part, when we were both home. He's super-busy all day, so I never expected help with the kids, but if the baby was napping when it was time to pick someone up from preschool, it was nice to not have to haul him along. All in all, it worked for us.