I don't know what to think.

+j+k+

DH almost bailed on the deal today but I threatened to leave if he refused to give SS an ultimatum.

DH has agreed to go to counseling. I don't know if many of you remember but my husband is STRONGLY opposed to counseling. His agreeing is nothing short of a small miracle.  He's doing it for us and he's doing it for SS.

He told SS that we want him to go, and if he does not, he will have to move on.

SS strongly opposed it but he is going to go.  He blames everything on dumb luck, his mom dying and all the charges brought up against him are all bogus or someone lied or it's just flat out not true and not his fault. Wrong place, wrong time kind of excuse.  He does not see how a stranger can possibly help him.

I told SS that if he doesn't want to go or he doesn't give this a legitimate chance that this arrangement is not going to work.  I said that what DH and I, and SS are doing now is not working and I don't see any change happening for the better.  In fact, things are only getting worse. For him.  For SD.  For even my marriage with DH.  So if it's not working - then maybe we need to consider going outside of this family and have someone else with no emotional baggage and a fresh perspective take a good fair look at all sides and help us as a family and individually.

By the end of the conversation, SS seemed to come around but I don't know how this will turn out.  I told him that if he gives it a fair and honest shot, then I can at least say SS tried and I will respect him alot for that.

There were moments I wanted to just strangle him and I about lost it, but DH kept me from losing it.  As enabling as DH is, he is really, really good at being diplomatic when it is required.

I would like to think that this is a positive but it's been so hard to be optimistic. But I guess I am a little. It's a positive step. Now I just have to figure out the details and set the appointments. Quick, before DH backs out!!

roycie27

I've only read bits and pieces of your situation but your DH agreeing to counseling is a great step forward. Sorry you are going through this and hopefully things keep getting better from here!

Holly_1007

sounds like a step in the right direction! will you be doing individual counseling as well as group and one-on-one counseling? I guess its a good step through the door to get everyone on board to begin though!