What is your experience with PM preschool re: cranky/naps, etc? (long)

schnappycat

DS currently attends AM preschool 4 days a week. He's on an IEP for speech and I just found out that next year (starting in August), he'll be required to attend in the afternoon so that the IEP kids are evenly distributed (by age, mostly). I understand that, but I'm really not happy about this for a few reasons.

The main reason is that my DD naps at about 2 or 2:30 most afternoons and the pickup time (3 PM) falls directly during that time. I have been unsuccessfully trying to nap her earlier, but she just sits in her crib and talks and plays until after 2 regardless. She just won't fall asleep that early (and we are up by 6:30 each morning, so that's not the issue). I understand that in 6 months this could all totally change, but I suspect she'll be still napping to some degree. It's really going to suck for her to either have to be woken up or just flat out not get to nap during the week. She actually does ok with no nap, but it's not something I'm striving for daily. And the school doesn't have one of those car lines I've heard about, so she can't sleep in the car. I have to get her out, walk a distance, sign DS out, and lug them back to the car. It's a process.

The other big issue is that while DS doesn't nap most days, he still gets very cranky in the PM and generally is more misbehaved. He's so much better in the AM. He's always been an early riser (both of my kids are) and a morning kid and gets worse as the day progresses.  And some days he still does nap, either purposefully in his room or accidentally on the floor. I'm sure this is common for this age, but how do others find their kids to do at school in the afternoon? People tell me that it will actually be good for me to send him off when he's at his worst (let the teacher deal with that!), but I don't want him acting out or just not learning at school. I just can't see him being at his best.

The last reason, although small, is that I just won't get a kid break at all. Right now DD does a couple of tot classes in the AM while DS is at school, at least one of which affords me an hour or two break a week (I can work out, run an errand, or just sit and read). It's heavenly! I have no family here, no regular sitter, and a DH who works a lot, so I'm desperate for even that hour a week I've been getting. With DS home in the AM, I'll either have to cancel her classes (which is unfair) or lug DS with me.  I know that seems petty and very minor, but I've gotten used to this schedule. 

I know it's a ways off and I'm sure it will work out (and I'll look back and laugh), but I'm curious how others have handled any of these issues. Thanks!

ETA: And it generally makes sense that the older kids would attend in the PM, but the non-IEP kids are given a choice. This year most of his AM class is made up of 2nd year 4-5 yos, some of which had a similar situation with younger siblings napping. They were surprised to hear we aren't given a choice. I'm just frustrated.  

WannaBMommy81

As the parent you have a right to not agree with the IEP.  Then will then reevaluate and decide based on your reasoning.  Maybe there is someone that would be in the morning that doesn't nap anymore.

kmhunt11

He should be fine with PM preschool at 4.5. Many kids are in full day day care or preschool long before 4.  DD was in full day Montessori school at 2.5.  She's now almost 4 and does full days because I didn't see any reason to back her down now that I'm not working.  

You could slowly push your DD's nap time back til 3:15 or whenever you can get her down after picking DS up.  Not having a break is hard- not a little deal at all, in my opinion.  I think that you'll find a way to make it work though.  Alternate play dates with a friend so you can each have an afternoon off, or something.  

Wally3

I would ask if there was a spot in the morning class or if they could let you know if a spot opens up.  My DS is in speech too and the am class usually has 3's&young 4's and the afternoon class is for 4's. Can you look and see if there any classes you DD can take in the pm to still give you a break?  When my ds was 2.5 he was napping later - now he is older his nap moved earlier. This summer start slowly creepying your dd nap earlier.

schnappycat

Thanks, everyone. I will definitely ask the teacher at our conferences later this month if there is any possibility of him remaining in the AM class. I understand that they can't have all of the IEP kids in the morning session (I think the ratio is 1/3 of the class), so I definitely get where they are coming from, and it only makes sense to move the older kids later. But perhaps there is another parent who prefers the PM session regardless of age. 

I will keep trying to bump up DD's nap to 1 again, too. I'm afraid that by the time we would get home from school and got her to nap it would be close to 4 (there is usually some playing after school time that delays us) and that would interfere with bedtime. Gah. Hopefully by the summer she'll have moved to a more conducive schedule. I know that at this age they do change up their schedules.

I'm sure I'm making mountains out of molehills and it will all work out.

rsd12

My son is in a similar position next year. But since he has an iep they offered a van/school bus pick up/drop off. Do you have this option available? Since my oldest goes to school in the opposite direction and at the same time as my 4 yr old, having the van pick up has been vital. And it helps since my 2 yr old definitely distracts the class too ; )

schnappycat

rsd12:

My son is in a similar position next year. But since he has an iep they offered a van/school bus pick up/drop off. Do you have this option available? Since my oldest goes to school in the opposite direction and at the same time as my 4 yr old, having the van pick up has been vital. And it helps since my 2 yr old definitely distracts the class too ; )

Hmm, that is a thought. I know that one or two of the other IEP kids sometimes get taken home by a bus, but I assumed it was because the parents worked and they were taken to daycare. I had no idea he qualified for a bus service because of his IEP. No one mentioned that to me. I would really hate to use the system just because my kid is napping, though, although I would be curious if we also would qualify or what that is all about. 

CD+AL

What about moving her nap later, after pick-up?  DS is in the PM class this year, and he definitely still needs his nap and so does DD.  Our "solution" was adjusting their nap schedule to after school, which means that they don't go to bed until late, but they don't get up early either.  DS comes straight home from school and has a snack, and then they both head up for naps.  I usually try to get them down from 4pm-5:30 or 6:00, and often I have to wake them up or they'd sleep too long.

We, OTOH, are going to have the opposite problem next year.  DS is moving to the AM class, and neither of my kids are early risers now.  As soon as school is out, I'm going to start adjusting them to an earlier schedule...earlier wake-up, earlier nap, earlier bedtime.

rsd12

rsd12:

My son is in a similar position next year. But since he has an iep they offered a van/school bus pick up/drop off. Do you have this option available? Since my oldest goes to school in the opposite direction and at the same time as my 4 yr old, having the van pick up has been vital. And it helps since my 2 yr old definitely distracts the class too ; )

I felt the same way, but they really encouraged the independence for my son too. Also I really think they thought my 2 yr old was a distraction every day ; ) last year I drove him, but this year was definitely tougher with the kids starting at the same time. From what I understand it is not an additional charge since they already have the van service and gets paid the same for 1 or 3 kids. If it helps any I adore his van drivers too. Can't help with the nap situation since I think naps are critical, but my son goes down around 1/1:30 and I wake him up by 2:30/3 or he won't sleep at night.

lite-bright

schnappycat:

rsd12:

My son is in a similar position next year. But since he has an iep they offered a van/school bus pick up/drop off. Do you have this option available? Since my oldest goes to school in the opposite direction and at the same time as my 4 yr old, having the van pick up has been vital. And it helps since my 2 yr old definitely distracts the class too ; )

Hmm, that is a thought. I know that one or two of the other IEP kids sometimes get taken home by a bus, but I assumed it was because the parents worked and they were taken to daycare. I had no idea he qualified for a bus service because of his IEP. No one mentioned that to me. I would really hate to use the system just because my kid is napping, though, although I would be curious if we also would qualify or what that is all about. 

Transportation should be offered as part of having an IEP. It's an automatic qualifier, as far as I know.

We were offered transport to both summer preschool and regular preschool for my DD1. We turned it down, because right now I prefer to drive her myself, but if she does summer preschool again I'll consider it. 

schnappycat

lite-bright:

schnappycat:

rsd12:

My son is in a similar position next year. But since he has an iep they offered a van/school bus pick up/drop off. Do you have this option available? Since my oldest goes to school in the opposite direction and at the same time as my 4 yr old, having the van pick up has been vital. And it helps since my 2 yr old definitely distracts the class too ; )

Hmm, that is a thought. I know that one or two of the other IEP kids sometimes get taken home by a bus, but I assumed it was because the parents worked and they were taken to daycare. I had no idea he qualified for a bus service because of his IEP. No one mentioned that to me. I would really hate to use the system just because my kid is napping, though, although I would be curious if we also would qualify or what that is all about. 

Transportation should be offered as part of having an IEP. It's an automatic qualifier, as far as I know.

We were offered transport to both summer preschool and regular preschool for my DD1. We turned it down, because right now I prefer to drive her myself, but if she does summer preschool again I'll consider it. 

Interesting. Thanks for pointing this out. I really had no idea and I wonder why it wasn't disclosed to us. I know one of the other little girl's mom didn't realize this either since we just had a conversation wondering why the little boy rides the bus home most days. Certainly those parents were told about it. I guess I can also ask this at our conference! 

ETA: Just found this on the website. So I'm guessing we don't actually qualify.

My child has been identified with a disability and has an IEP. Does the school district provide transportation? Transportation is considered to be a related service for students. The IEP committee will determine if special transportation services are needed based on the student?s individual needs and IEP.