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January 2011 Moms
MarSamWhitney
member
Your birth story?
MarSamWhitney
member
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Your birth story?
Recap me. lol Did Your water break in a giant gush everywhere? Were you induced?
I hope I'm not the only one who posts...lol.
Was on bedrest 7 weeks... 35 weeks 2 days, H brought me home 2 jr bacon cheeseburgers and a large frosty at 11pm. Ate them in bed. Laid down to watch "Everybody Loves Raymond", no sooner did my head hit the pillow did I feel a "BOOM" and water gushed all over the matress. I jumped out of bed and ran downstairs to tell H my water broke. More water gushed all over the kitchen floor. H jumped up and let the dogs out to pee and start the car.
I grabbed my hospital bag by the front door and ran upstairs to rinse off in the shower. (Why!?) lol. Took all clothes out of my hospital bag in a panic, and dressed myself in them. Kissed my dogs and cried that I would be away from them for a few days.
12:40am, got on the road. Called my mom, no answer. Called my Sister J who cried with excitement. Called my mom again. Called sis again, and told her to get the F ahold of mom, I was in a lot of pain at that point, and I was getting ticked they werent answering. lol. Called IL's, and FIL answered on the first ring, as if he was expecting that call on that day.
45 minutes to the hospital, and I am soaked in fluid. I remember being handed a ton of paperwork to sign and I was irritated. "HELLO PPL, I'M HAVING A BABY!!" LOL. Threw up in the lobby, and was actually happy I did that. I did not want to shITT on the table two jr bacon cheeseburgers.
Got settled in and they told me to advise when I wanted the epi. At that point I was ok, but things turned quickly. They finally checked me at about 2:00am, discovering I was a 9. Nurses get nervous, surprised I was that far and start rushing around. Got a shot of morphine to hold me over. Pain was pretty bad, and I was crying a lot. After a half hour, I got the epi, and I was mad as hell I had to wait that long. Asked the guy where the F he was, was he on break?! Calmed down. Posted on FB.
Slept 2:30-6, and was told to call the nurse when I felt like pushing. At this point I knew my entire family had been in the waiting room, and I figured I should try to push. Called everyone in. A Nicu team waited in the room, baby was measuring at 4 pounds 5 ounces a few days before. They told me when to push, H held my leg, I thought my eyeballs were going to pop out of my sockets. I had a 1 armed nurse holding my other leg. H was telling me I was doing great, it made me feel good. They kept telling me they could see hair. H looked and I remember being shocked.
Later I found out they thought i was giving up/ lost the heart beat. So they asked me if they could use the vacuum. I said yes, and out she came. In active labor a half hour. Lots of "Its a girl!! Its a girl!!" They abruptly cut the cord, showed her to me, and handed her to the NICU team. I cried and cried with joy.
5 pounds 2 oz, no NICU needed, healthy as can be. 1/2 hour later as family trickles in, I get to tell them its a girl, Mom, MIL, Sister all cry.
A very laid back delivery for a very rocky pregnancy :-)
39w3d Induction! 6am arrive at hospital, 6:30-7 water was broke and pitocin had been started already. 9 am the nurse checked me and I had not changed a smidgit so she pushed me from a 3 to a 3.5 ouch
Contractions continued to increase in length and severity throughout the day but around 6pm Lo's hearrate started to drop. Dr talked me into a c-section (which I am still not so happy about.) 6:36pm (I am pretty sure that was the exact time but don't quote me) Jay was born.
That is the short version.
I edited out a couple things because my family reads this, but you get the main idea:
https://babyped.blogspot.com/2011/01/new-baby-girl.html
I never posted birth stories on the bump, so these are directly from the kids' journals. Aiden's isn't as detailed because I wasn't as "in" to journaling then...
Aiden:
I had contractions starting at 38 weeks, but you were stubborn so they induced me on your due date, July 21st, 2009 (I had gestational diabetes). Dr. H broke my water at 8am. They started Pitocin at 9:30am. I was at 3cm and got my Epi at 1pm and kissed the pain goodbye! by 4:45pm I was at 10 cm and ready to push. We were all laughing and joking when you came out after a few pushes at 5:04pm! I've never been so excited and emotional in my life it was amazing to finally meet you. I loved you so much that very first moment!
Emily:
Today, January 28th, 2011, is your due date & mommy is going in to be induced! (again with gestional diabetes) We got to the hospital at 6:30am and had to wait for Dr. F to check me until 9am! He said your head was too high to break my water so they started me on Pitocin to get my contractions going and had me pace the room (#3008) and rock back and forth on an exercise ball.
At 11am they broke my water and Daddy and I went back to watching movies. We watched Red with Bruce Willis and The Town with Ben Affleck. By 1 pm the anesthesiologist put in my Epidural and then I planned to nap. However my epi numbed everything except the right side of my tummy and pelvis, so the doctor gave me a bolus dose of lidocaine.
The bolus finished the numbing process but it also dropped my blood pressure & made it difficult to breath. Then you started to drop your heart rate with my contractions, so they turned off the Epi & put internal monitors on you. This was 3:30 pm and I was dilated to 5cm.
At about 4pm my contractions had gotten sporadic & they thought your head had turned the wrong way, so they laid me flat & put a towel roll beneath my tailbone. After about 5 minutes I told the RN I felt a lot of movement really low.
My RN, Amy, checked me and called for a cart and doctor stat! I was scared and asked what was wrong now?! Amy said "nothing! Don't push she is right there crowning!" I was so shocked and relieved that I started crying while a bunch of nurses buzzed around getting everything ready.
I only pushed for a minute and you were here! I couldn't stop crying. They put you on my chest and you were pretty blue. You gave a little cry and daddy cut your cord. Then the nurses took you & put a little oxygen on you to pink you up. You weighed 7 lb, 2 oz and were 20 inches long. They brought you back right away and you immediately wanted to nurse like a little pro!
It's kind of sad how much more detailed Emily's story is
I got my membranes stripped January 18th (Tuesday) and started having mild contractions before I even left the office. They continued all through the night so I barely slept at all. Wednesday I was supposed to go see a friend but I was afraid to leave the house in case the contractions got to strong so I stayed home. DH came home from work, we had dinner, he went to bed and I again stayed up with contractions. I called my friend who lives a couple houses down and asked if she might be able to drive me to the hospital if DH was already at work the next day since he was working an hour away that day.
Fast forward to 4am when DH wakes up to go to work. I was still awake with contractions about 5-6 minuets apart strong enough that I couldn't talk that well through them. I was convinced I wasn't in labor so I told him to go to work. An hour later I had a huge gush of blood and called DH to tell him I was going to the hospital and drove myself there. He had just gotten to work and had to turn around. The on call dr. said he didn't know what the blood was but I was only 2 cm and my contractions were only 4 minuets apart so I was sent home. We got home about 6am and I went back and forth between the tub and walking around the house. About 11am DH was about to leave because I kept telling him I wanted a milkshake since all I ate the day before was a pop tart and a taco and I knew once we went to the hospital I wouldn't eat for awhile but as he opened the door I yelled at him to stop and take me to the hospital.
I was a 5 when we got there and went back and forth from the tub and walking for about 5ish hours and made no progress. I had been awake for almost 2 days at this point and opted for the epi so I could rest a little. I went from 5 to 10 and ready to push in 3 hours. 35 minuets of pushing and out she came at 40 weeks 6 days 7 pounds 9 ounces and 20 1/2 inches long with giant head full of black hair.
Was scheduled to be induced on Monday (1/24), I was just over 41w. Contractions started the Friday before induction, we went to the hospital that night but got sent home. I was only 1cm. Contractions continued all weekend, finally early Monday morning I couldn't take it anymore. I was trying to hold out for my induction appt., plus I didn't want to go back and it be nothing again.
When we got to the hospital I was only 3cm. Got epi right away, I'm a wuss!Around lunchtime the nurses kept saying it's going to be soon, and they were prepping everything. At 5P, still no baby, and epi wore off. Dr checked me and I was 8cm, she said I wasn't progressing and suggested a c/s. I agreed, and DD was born at 6P.
I just wrote mine this week. I'd be happy to share, but forewaring that it is looooong. Though, I guess with a 60+ hour labor that makes sense, LOL! I'll put it in small font so it doesn't require as much scrolling.
Saturday, January 1 (my EDD) we had dinner with DH?s parents and I noticed some contractions. Once I was in bed, I noticed the contractions were getting stronger and more consistent. By 1:30 am when I finally fell asleep, they were 7 minutes apart. At 3:45 I woke up DH to time them. They were at 5 min apart and surprisingly painful from the start. I was expecting intense pressure in my belly and pelvis, not pain through my back. For the next 5 hours we did shower time, I relaxed/breathed through them in bed, I listened to relaxation scripts and music and DH got the last of the things together when I needed alone time, etc. I had anticipated wanting him right there with me for at all as the trusty Bradley coach. But, I discovered that I relaxed best alone.
The contractions kept going steadily and progressively and after five-ish hours, they were three minutes apart, lasting a good while, and I couldn?t talk through them. Around 8:30, we called our doula, and we called the nurse?s line and everyone agreed that it was time to start working our way in. I was admitted into an awesome room with a laboring tub (the hospital only has 2 such rooms), my own doctor was on call (a rare occurrence--they cycle through 8 docs), and our nurse was one we'd met during our version who we knew was med-free supportive. It seemed like that day, Sunday, January 2, was going to be the day for our baby boy to be born!
I had not been doing internal progress exams during the pregnancy, but decided to do one when we arrived at the hospital. I was at 75% effaced, 1 centimeter dilated, and baby?s head was at -2 station. This news was shocking given the frequency and pain of the contractions and that we had followed all of the ?rules? for coming in as late as possible in terms of contraction counting. Nonetheless, Dr. was encouraging and we prepared for labor to keep on trucking along, though the contractions had slowed from where we?d been at home.
At that point, I got a heplock put in, which I knew from previous visits to L&D was something if refused would start things off on the wrong foot with the nurses. I figured it was a small, reasonable compromise that would set a peaceful tone.
All settled in around 11:30am, I decided to take advantage of the labor tub because of the terrible back labor. The doula was there by that point and devised a way to keep the heplock dry with a medical glove and medical tape. The tub felt great, but I was never able to 100% relax because I had to focus on not getting that hand too wet. Nonetheless, I was on the path to relaxation. The doula put electric candles in the bathroom and she and DH took turns talking with me and helping me relax. For twenty minutes of every hour, I was supposed to get out of the water and be monitored in the bed. I didn?t fully comprehend it at the time, but that was jarring to my relaxation and the move from the water to the bed expended emotional and physical energy. I felt very supported by DH and the doula and we passed the time with walking, relaxation, abdominal breathing, time on the ball, etc. After a few more hours things slowed more and more.
Five hours later, around 4:30pm I asked for another internal. I was 100% effaced but only 2 cm dilated--more hard news. I realized that the bath was really the most comfortable place to be, so I spent much of the next few hours in the water (but getting out for monitoring, though sometimes the staff would extend my time off the monitor). Around 7, my BFF came to visit and brought more beloved apple cider and some good company. After she left a few hours later, I wanted to walk the halls. I needed to stop for the painful back contractions and walked super slowly, but it was something to do that would hopefully help, as the contractions had slowed. Around 10:30, I was ready for another internal and this exam found no change.
Because I had made no progress for so long, we were offered the chance to go home, but decided to sleep through the night at the hospital in hopes that being settled would gear me up again. I was nervous about losing the room with the tub after the water had been so soothing to me and I did not want to make another painful trip in the car. DH and I decided that everyone should get some rest and we sent the doula home while DH and I slept.
I woke up at 1:30 am (Monday, December 3) with regular, intense contractions. DH and I worked through them in the tub and shower but then they stared to decline and so we got some more sleep in. By the time morning rolled around, I was having no contractions and had only made a 1/2 cm progress. Since I didn't want to be induced, the doc suggested that we go home and wait it out, and we agreed.
I went home physically and emotionally exhausted. It was at this point that fear and anxiety set in. I had always?well, from my late teen years when I learned about the Bradley Method? truly believed in my body?s ability to birth a baby of its own accord. But here I was, feeling that I?d read my body?s signs wrong, or that they had misguided me, and it was emotionally draining. The length of the labor wasn?t the bad part?I had just told nurse that we'd waited 2.5 years for this baby, we surely could wait a few more days?but the beginnings of the realization that my body might not just make this work had set it. At about 3pm, I started having contractions again. A friend brought us California Tortilla for dinner around 6. Nachos for me! I was sitting backward on a folding chair in the living room processing through regular, intense contractions again about 5 min apart. Later she shared she could have sworn from my contractions and my reactions that baby was coming soon.
I decided that I wanted to labor in the tub again since it had felt so good at the hospital. So, DH prepared a bath for me and kept me company for a bit then said he was getting tired asked if BFF could come and help while he slept. She came and kept me company while I continued to labor in the tub. A mere 15 minutes after DH went to bed, my contractions started to speed up and get intense again, to the point where they were two minutes apart, lasting for almost that whole time, and too painful to talk through. BFF was adamant that it was time to go to the hospital and woke DH, who took a more relaxed speed in calling the doula and the nurse?s line despite BFF?s continual prodding. We learned that our doula1 would not be meeting us at the hospital due to a family issue, but could send her backup doula, who we had never met. That was a big disappointment, as having an excellent doula we trusted was the only reason I had agreed to a hospital birth instead of the home birth I had always wanted. (Another big factor was money. It was $4k for a MW birth and $0 OOP for a hospital birth.)
We made it back to the hospital at about 10:30 and ended up back in the same room as before. BFF followed us in her car came up to the room with us. This time Dr.2 was on call. I had seen him a few times during my pregnancy and I knew he was a fairly low-key guy, like Dr.1. I wanted a progress check and this one showed I was 4 cm and baby was at -1 station.
I was ready to get back into the water. But, Dr.2 was against it because I had been in labor for so long (though my water had not broken). I knew this was a bogus rule, so I drew the bath anyway, but rule follower that I am?I just could not relax in the bath knowing that I was violating his orders. So, I got out of the water and labored on the exercise ball in the room. Eventually, Doula2 showed up and BFF headed out. Doula2 didn?t know anything about us or our birth wishes or that Doula1 had also been hired to do photography, but we were not fully aware of that at the time. Because I was in so much pain, she just jumped right into helping me through. It took a leap of faith to throw myself emotionally and physically into the arms of an unknown person, but utilizing a doula had been the hallmark of me agreeing to a hospital birth, so I just abandoned my hesitations and went with it. We soon discovered a bit of kindred spiritedness, as well as the shared journey of loss and infertility.
Because I was no longer comfortable in the bath, I felt robbed of my most effective pain-management strategy, which was another emotional blow. Around 1:30 AM Doula2 suggested that we put the exercise ball in the shower and she and DH took turns aiming the spray at the small of my back. This gave me the benefit of the water, but without breaking the rules. It was a brilliant suggestion, and we spent most of the night like this. I would have to get out for monitoring, but then would go right back in to the shower. This was a lifesaver outside of the bath.
The in and out for monitoring also played into being cold and expending energy. We kept the lights off in the bathroom, which ended up having the added blessing that the staff backed off on pushing monitoring. I took it as respect for my wishes and niceness, but at one point I know they genuinely thought we had left the room for a long time.
During the monitoring a little after 3am, some decelerations showed up. Dr.2 encouraged me to have two bags of IV hydration and extended monitoring. I also agreed to an internal which showed dilation of 7-8 cm, baby at 0 station and bulging bag of waters. Dr.2 expressed concern about the strain of a long labor on my body. I don?t remember any of what he said because my nature of trusting my body to do this (and my fear of the domino effect) were still with me. It was obvious that my body was doing its job?ever so slowly?and my contractions were continuing every 3-4 minutes. I think I thought that delivery was nearing, and that perhaps baby would even be born in his sack.
A little before 5:30 am, I got out of the shower for monitoring, but brought the ball with me and sat on that during the test. During it, my water broke all and spread down the towel-covered ball and all over the floor.
Dr.2 stopped in after my water broke and shared with us the idea that baby might be occiput posterior (OP). He wanted to do an internal exam to feel and tell me but I refused to avoid the chance of infection and because I felt like I was now on a delivery clock. I suggested they do an ultrasound rather than an internal. I got a bizarre line about how ultrasound wouldn?t show us, but a bit after 7:30, Dr.2 returned with a portable machine that showed baby was head-down and very likely OP.
During the night and early morning, I was much less chatty than the first days. I remember being mostly silent. Or maybe I wasn?t and I just felt silent. I felt silent and alone in the shower. Not abandoned, but definitely like this was my road alone to conquer. I know that I dozed off some on the ball. Eventually, I know that I was miserable and begging and crying for help. I don?t know that I wanted medicine, but I wanted hope and answers. The pain was relentless and unbearable. I felt like I had been tortured for days by a body that was supposed to innately know how to do this. I was and sick of people getting me out of my relaxation zone for monitoring I didn?t want in the first place. Scripture started running though my head, ?I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me,? was a mantra. Then something in me changed. I went from and desperate to deciding that no one was going to make me do anything I didn?t want to. When I was told it was time for monitoring again, I talked myself into it. I no longer felt the need to rush to do it on their timeline. This was my birth and I did have choices. I started using lots of ?I? statements out-loud to motivate myself. ?I am choosing to get out of the shower.? ?I am choosing to get monitored?. I got very articulate. I decided that though I couldn?t take my relaxation with me out of the shower, I could still take my intense focus. It think that it was a gift from God to prepare me for the next step in my labor: meeting Dr.3.
Dr. 3 started off very unlike the previous doctors. From our first encounter, on the morning of January 4, it was clear that she had her own way of doing things. She yelled into the bathroom where I was laboring in the shower and refused to come in when invited (inviting people into the bathroom was part of my new assertion strategy). She insisted that she could only meet me if I was in bed and agreed to an internal exam. She didn?t care about my place in labor, she wanted me for monitoring even if I was in a middle of the contraction. She actually asked me what my problem was when I had a hard time moving because of the frequent contraction. When I motivated myself to come out, she told me that she?d talked to Dr. Greenhouse (our reproductive endocrinologist) about me and that this was a special day. I found her reference to our infertility without me first bringing it up very over-personal.
She was high-pressure about doing an internal, but I had decided that I was ready to know where I was at. I don?t remember where I was at, nor did she enter it into my medical records. She asked me my shoe size and then told that there was no way I could deliver my baby vaginally. (It seems that my small shoe size confirmed to her that I had a small pelvis). She also said that my pelvis was not shaped the right way, so baby couldn?t come out. This was shocking because Dr. Singer had told me twice in my pregnancy that my pelvis showed no contradictions for vaginal delivery, even with the extreme pelvic separation that had developed. (My 24 weeks PG, I had the worst case my OB had ever seen and no one knew what to do about it. I had been in intense pain for the last month of my PG.)
Dr.3 told me that with her twenty years of experience with natural birth, I just wouldn?t be able to do it vaginally. Even though she was definite in her negativity, and in her position that we were moving toward a c-section, somehow we did get her to suggest that if the baby turned out of the OP position, there was a chance he could be born vaginally. I was upset by her comment, but I don?t remember believing a word of her talk about my pelvis and inability. I was, however, motivated to get baby to move. Dr. 3 suggested adding fluid into my uterus and manually moving baby with her hand. She also suggested laying on my side and stomach (similar to the Bradley relaxation position). I asked for some time to think about it, as I knew to do with all interventions. I didn?t like the idea of introducing anything into my uterus and I was concerned about the relaxation pose. My pelvic separation made lying in that position unbearably painful and with all of the pain I had already been through, I just didn?t think I could do it.
In retrospect, I find it interesting that I knew to trust the pain of labor and birth and let it guide me, but the pelvic pain was something that truly struck fear into my heart. I think it was my belief in the guiding power of pain that led me to that fear. When I lay on my side, I felt like half of my pelvis was suspended, unsupported in space and that I might actually do serious damage that way. Anatomically, I don?t know if it played into the damage that we would discover in the months after the birth.
Doula2 helped us walk through the low tech ways to move baby: namely a slow dancing move and leaning over the ball. We tried both. While I was on the ball, Doula1 rejoined our group. I thought that Doula2 would leave, and was bummed out by that idea since we had bonded. But, when Doula1 and Doula2 talked about Dr. 3?s approach to me, they decided that both would stay. They both had previous experience with Dr. 3 that was not favorable to natural birth or a relaxed environment.
We talked through the pros and cons of the options. I was so, so sad to be considering an epidural, but with my renewed mental clarity and resolve and ownership of my experience I could see that it seemed like the path most likely to avoid a c-section. While my dream was an unmedicated birth, the lowest intervention birth was another goal and ironically enough, meds seemed to be a sane part of that. Dr. 3 never mentioned an epidural?one thing I respected about her care?but I didn?t think I could get through those two things without it. Even with the burst of clarity-of-mind, my strength and sanity were giving out from the work of the previous days. We decided that I would ask for one more internal to see if maybe I was more ready that I thought. But, if not I would get the epidural to facilitate the interventions: side-laying first and the fluid if that didn?t work. Doula2 and Doula1 walked DH and I through our options and questions, but did not offer their opinion. I later learned that they both though this was wise move and knowing Dr. 3?s style feel certain she would?ve moved me to a c-section quickly had I not gone this route. A year out from the birth, I also believe this.
When Dr. 3 came in, I forgot to ask for the internal and just said that I was ready to move forward and that I wanted an epidural to facilitate things. I beat myself up emotionally over forgetting that in the months after the birth. In retrospect, it probably wouldn?t have changed a thing. I strongly suspect that I was one of those people for whom an epidural relaxes the pelvis and allows baby to descend. I also think that the restful period I was about to get would stave off maternal exhausting for remaining hours to come. But, before the rest came the tears.
Doula1 and Doula2 stepped out, as they were not allowed in the room while anesthesiology was there, per hospital policy. As it turns out, the anesthesiologist didn?t care if they were in there, but I let them stay away so they could grab some lunch. It was around 11:30. Realizing that I was selling out the dream of a med-free birth that I?d had since I was a teen, I started crying before the epidural was placed. The anesthesiologist was trying to be nice but made some sort of jerky comment about how lots of women think they can do it on their own and then he gets called in. It was so demeaning because in my heart, I felt this was a medically advantageous decision and not one that was about eliminating labor and delivery pain. I had made it through 50+ hours of labor without meds, a true ultra-marathon, and now I was reduced in someone?s eyes to a weak woman who couldn?t handle it. It felt like just lonely me against the world to the point that I have no recollection of DH being there (though he assures me he was).
After that team left, I worked toward getting in the side-laying position. Dr. 3 had said that even with the epidural it would be uncomfortable and most women could only manage a few minutes. I was resolved to make it work, no matter how long it took. We put on relaxation music, darkened the room, and I focused on my breathing for as long as I could bear the pressure in my belly. I made it much longer than any patient had before, though I cannot recall the time. Dr. 3 check baby and found that he had indeed moved, but he had moved occiput transverse (OT), an even less desirable position. We moved toward the fluid option which was not successful. I think it was at this point that she discovered I had meconium staining. This was another thing that from Bradley classes didn?t stress me out, but Dr. 3 again insisted that a c-section was undoubtedly the road ahead. Yet, our little labor team kept plugging along and eventually I reached full dilation.
I started to have the urge to push, so I did some practice pushes with the nurse. Pushing was the part of labor I felt like I knew the least about, but I knew that my body would guide me. Albiet, now with an epidural I did worry a bit that my body might not be able to tell me what to do. I let the contractions I felt guide me and I pushed what felt like to the point of comfort. At some point in this, baby?s heart started to have some decelerations. This seemed part of the deal to me: I was pushing, I?d had an epidural, it made sense. But, Dr. 3 came to talk to us about it. She referred to the decelerations as ?dippy doos? and encouraged me that it was time to get baby out. With her small frame, girly voice and baby talk, she reminded me of the Dolores Umbridge character from Harry Potter: utterly charming on the outside with a voice as sweet as honey that was used for spewing nastiness. She left and I continued to push to the point of comfort. When Dr. 3 returned, she was more adamant that I get baby out. She said I had thirty minutes or I would need to get wheeled down the hall for a c-section. I continued to work on my pushing and invited nurse Lara to coach me because I had lost all urge to push on my own.
We worked for a bit on it when Dr. 3 returned to check on me. This time, it was pure nastiness. She asked me if I had even been trying and told me I wasn?t doing a good enough job. I invited her to coach me through some contractions herself. She encouraged pushing hard and long, to the point I thought the blood vessels in my eyes might burst. I needed oxygen to make it through. It felt so wrong, but I knew that she could call it done at any moment. We were well past the thirty minute deadline she?d set. The doulas and DH took turns holding my hand and legs. Doula2 was amazing and whispered gentler encouragement to me. Dr. 3 yelled at me, berated me, used sports metaphors. I think she meant well, she was genuinely concerned for my baby and was trying to find something to motivate me. But, all of those were the wrong thing for me. I had prepared for a gentle birth guided by my intuition. I am a positive person by nature and thrive off of positive words. Eventually, she said something about getting mad that resonated. The idea of getting mad at a pain was something I recalled from Bradley class. I focused on that. I am not an angry person, so I tried to focus on things that make me mad. Dr. 3 was one of them. I was mad at her and her infuriating approach. The other things I could think of were social injustice, rape, starvation. But, those are not things to think about during birth, so I summed it up as evil, as Satan. So, that was my focus: anger at Dr. 3 and at Satan. If I could push harder to get her to shut up, then it was worth the anger.
At some point in there, they got the mirror in place for me to see his head and I got to feel it. It didn?t mean much. I couldn?t really see in the mirror or feel much. All I knew was that focusing on those things was taking my focus away from pushing. So, I had them remove the mirror. Later, I was sad to not have been able to see the actual delivery, though I am told that Dr. 3 would?ve insisted on it being moved.
Then, after all of that it was time for V to come out. Dr. 3 was shocked that it was going to happen. He was coming, really coming, and faster than she?d thought since she just didn?t believe it would happen. I was told to stop pushing while the team got the resuscitation team assembled. (I don?t think I listened to her to stop pushing?ha!) We knew by then that they would take V to the table in the room because of the decelerations and the meconium. We agreed that DH would go with him. So, when I pushed him out, I was happy and surprised that she layed him on my torso for a moment. I remember him looking wet and grey. He was silent. I wasn?t worried, but I was just taking it all in. I saw the cord for a brief moment. Then they moved him to the table and he made his first cry?small with a squeak at the end. I wanted to know how his spine looked, as we?d been concerned about a neural tube defect. V was born at 4:56 PM and weighed in at 6 lbs 12 oz and 20 in long. His first APGAR was a two, but by five minutes he was at a nine. Ultimately, I had pushed for 3 ? hours.
DH and Doula1 were at the table with V and I think Doula2 went to the bathroom. I am pretty sure that she became very emotional (perhaps thinking of her own many lost babies) and excused herself for a moment, but I have never been able to bring myself to ask. In terms of my compassion for this dear woman , it doesn?t matter. In terms of being alone with Dr. 3, it just added more fuel to the fire. During that time, Dr. 3 continued to work and I felt strange sensations. When I asked her what was going on she laughed at me and told me it was the placenta coming out. Records indicate the placenta was delivered just three minutes after V?s birth, so I suspect she was pulling it out, despite our wishes to the contrary. I got distracted with what was going on with V and the cord and placenta were gone before I could ask about them. This is something that would make me very sad in the months to come. Seeing this marvel of life was something important to me, and I felt was part of the healing process of loss and infertility since my hormones wouldn?t sustain life, yet this time the placenta ot a chance to grow and do its job. I later learned that Dr. 3 has a reputation of thinking placentas are gross and disdaining patients who don?t share this sentiment. She also told me that I was facing hemorrhage and needed to have the pit. I asked her to wait, but very quickly she brought it up again. There is nothing in her records that indicate a hemorrhage, so I suspect it was just another case of her doing things her way. She never said anything about stitching me or if she administered medicine to do so. But, she did tell me that I had torn because not only had been born in the very challenging OT position where the largest part of his head was coming first, but his face was to the side with his hand by his head. At some point, I learned that it was a third degree tear plus a partial. In the months to come, I would learn that I also had sustained nerve damage in my pelvis. I do not know if this is from the long labor, baby?s position, the extreme pushing, or another factor.
After a few minutes, DH brought me our V. He was calm and very alert and I could admire his dark blond duck fluff hair and his big, round eyes. They were either hazel or very dark blue--it was hard to tell then. He had long, scraggly fingernails and his feet were dried out and wrinkled like an old man?s. His ear was folded down from where he?d been touching it on his way out. He was amazing. We did the breast crawl, something I had long dreamed of seeing, and he nuzzled up to my breast quickly. How the nurses, doulas, and I all missed that he was snuggling with my nipple but not latching is perplexing to me, but that is another story. V did earn his first nickname of Snuggler the next day because he would snuggle with my breast rather than latch.
We were enamored by this little boy. His amazingness was the best motivation for all that was still to come in terms of my pelvis and back getting worse and worse, panic attacks whenever I would feel pain in my back, feeling abandoned by our doulas who largely disappeared and blew off our post-partum appointments, feeling disbelieved and rejected by doctor after doctor because no one knew how to treat my pelvis. It would carry me through a couple thousand dollars in medical care and months of physical therapy as we finally?at 7 months post-partum? discovered the nerve damage, that my perineum was covered in painful scar tissue, that I had vitamin deficiencies that were preventing my body from healing, and that my pelvic and SI ligaments were still excessively loose and my pelvis would fall out of alignment causing intense lower back pain. But, over time we worked toward finding peace as well as physical and emotional healing.
It wasn?t the birth of my dreams, but V is certainly the baby of my dreams, and parenting him is all the sweeter for the fight.
More Green For Less Green
So I never had Braxton Hicks at all. But on Jan 5, I woke up to what felt like mild period cramps around 1:30 AM. These continued at regular intervals (8-10 minutes apart) for like 12 hours. I started monitoring them with a phone app. Approx 12 hours after they started, I was at the computer and felt a little pop and a trickle. I went to the bathroom thinking it was either my water or I had peed. But I did have a bloody show, so I thought it was my water. Called H and the OB. OB's office was on the fence but said I could come in and get checked, so I did. They did a test strip and told me it was NOT my water and sent me home. Within 3 hours of going home the contractions ramped up in frequency and intensity. I called the OB on call around 6:00 PM, and she said if I wanted to be checked again, to come to the hospital.
We packed things up, I showered. By the time we got to the hospital (8:00 ish) they were every couple minutes and I was in pain and moaning and basically barely holding it together. They admitted me, checked me and said I was only 1/2" dialated. Within about an hour and a half I went to a 5, and they called for an epi. While waiting for the anthesiologist I barfed and was feeling pressure (probably in transition). It was really hard not to give in to the urge to push (I thought maybe I had to poop but I never did). As soon as the epi went in (less than 30 minutes after they called) I was feeling pressure and they checked and I was at 9 1/2". The epi was magical, within two contractions it kicked in and I felt nothing, but could still move my legs.
They got the room ready. I pushed for about 45 minutes, with oxygen and turning to my side between contractions to keep baby's heart rate where it needed to be. They had to tell me when to push because the epi was working so well.
LO crowned and then my contractions stalled with her head half out. We were all joking around and waiting for another contraction to finish things up. It came after a couple minutes, and she was here at 1:09 AM on Jan 6!! She barely cried, but I got to hold her for a second. H was crying, I was teary-eyed but not crying. I asked shouldn't she be crying more, and the nurse said yes, so they took her to the warming table and rubbed her. Some respiratory specialists came in with a scary looking orange bag and checked her over, but by then her color had perked up and she had started to cry. They bundled her up and brought her to me, and we put her on my boob. She latched briefly. We hung out while delivered the placenta and got a stitch. H made the mistake of looking when the placenta came out. LOL. Then we moved up to our room around 4:30. So from the start of my mild contractions it was around 24 hours. 12 hours after my water broke, and probably 6-7 hours of hard active labor.
ETA: OB office- thanks for telling me I had peed my pants and was just a clueless first time mom! Morons- that WAS my water and lucky for me my body went into active labor and I didn't hang out like that!!
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It's been awhile since I have been on here, and thought I would join in. We will see how much I can remember.
I had BH throughout my 3rd trimester and they would usually last about 30-45 min and then would go away. The contractions were never less than 10 minutes apart either. Also for a little background, I had GD and my OB gave me the impression he was going to have to induce me on Jan 10th. At my last appt he told me at my next appt. he was going to see if I had started dialating (which would have put me at 38.5 weeks).
So I noticed I was having some contractions around 12:30p on Sunday (Jan. 2). I thought they were BH and I was waiting for them to go away. With my previous BH, I wasn't in the mindset at this point that I was labor. I noticed the contractions but they weren't that painful to me yet. I would get the feeling like l needed to go to the bathroom and have BM, but nothing would happen. I remember DH asking me one time if I was feeling ok as he noticed something was different. By this point it had been about an hour to hour and a half from when the contractions started. I didn't answer him the first time and he asked me again. I tried answered "I'm fine" without him knowing I am in the bathroom trying to have a BM, but I failed. DH didn't like the answer I gave him and ran upstairs to pack his hospital bag really quick. We live less than 5 miles from the hospital so it really didn't matter if he had a bag. Ironically he made me pack my bag the night before as I am a procrastinator and he wanted to make sure I had everything I needed.
I ended up going and laying down in bed to see if that would help relax me and for the contractions to stop. This is when I started to time my contractions with my phone to see if they were really getting closer together. They were still anywhere from 8-10 min apart, some would sneak in about 5 or 6 min, but nothing really consistant. After about an hour or so I made my way out of bed since I really wasn't comfortable and DH had gone out to get some food and I tried to eat. The contractions were slowly getting stronger to where I had to stop what I was doing for the contratction to pass. We figured this was a good time to call the Dr to find out what to do, mind you I still didn't think I was in labor. The on-call Dr called us back and spoke to my husband first as I was having a contraction when the phone rang. Once I got a chance to talk to him he told me to come in and we will get checked out.
DH grabbed our bags and we put the dog in her crate and headed to the hospital. We thought about taking the dog to be boarded for the night since they were still open at that time, but we didn't think we would be gone all night.
We get to the hospital and DH drops me off at the door to goes to park the car. I slowly walk in to registration and take a seat at the desk so I can get admitted. The woman tells me they don't have my registration information. WHAT?!?!?!? I had filled out the information TWICE and the second time I had given it to the woman who was sitting on the other side of the desk. She had me fill out the registration paperwork when I was at the hospital for one of my GD consults. Anyway, I try to answer the questions between my contractions the best I can without being annoyed. And I eventually get to my room.
Once in my room the nurse is also asking me all sorts of questions because apparently my complete file didn't make it the hospital from my Dr, but I am not sure who's fault that is, my guess it's the hospital as previous situation. They didn't have my beta test results, so they had to give me penicilin, just in case I was positive, I wasn't. While driving to the hospital I jokingly said to DH if the contractions were going to be like this the rest of the time I wanted the dr to meet me in the parking lot with the epi. When they did check to see how far long I was, I was 6-7cm! I was totally expecting them to say 2-3cm. So when they asked me if I wanted an epi I said yes. Then I was told I had to make it through 1 bag of IV fluid before they could give it to me. I asked the nurse how long would it take to make it through and she said an hour at 'full throttle.' I thought I would never make it! So they gave me something to take the edge off (must have been morphine, but I wasn't sure and not really paying attention). By this point I was in labor for about 6 hours.
I got the epi and felt good, although my left leg was totally useless. I couldn't move it. When our nurse had me pushing DH had to pick up my leg as I couldn't feel anything and had no control of it. At one point they noticed LO looked like he was falling asleep. I looked at my belly and told him he wasn't allowed to sleep until he was outside. We needed to find something caffinated to wake LO up, but with no sugar. I really don't like coffee, but settled on diet pepsi, not a favorite either. And the on-call dr gave me some pitocin as it was starting to get late (about 10:30p at this point) to speed things up as well. DS was born at 1258a, just about 12 hours of labor. We saw our nurse every once in a while as when I arrived at the hospital there were 3 of us in labor, by the time LO was born all 15 rooms were full and 3 more moms were on their way in. Needless to say they were busy! We were turned over to our PP room earlier than normal as they needed to turn the delivery room over for someone else coming in.
I still have the times on my phone when I was timing contractions, I wish I could keep them in there forever. Also it's funny I never turned off the time and when LO was about a month old or so I noticed it was still running! So I have it stopped on 417 hours!
Mine is pretty simple as I had a scheduled C-Section....
In choosing a repeat C-Section I received conflicting information from the doctors. The first told me a VBAC would be fine (it had been almost 14 years since the previous one) but others told me because the baby was so big that I would definitely need a RCS. DH & I discussed and due to the bad experience with DS#1 we chose the RCS route. I think the final decision maker was that I had received a copy of my delivery records from Justin and after reading about that C-Section I did not want to labor, have a baby in the birth canal and end up with a CS at that point. At my final ultrasound I found out Joshua was no where as big as they had been telling me to expect - I even figured they had it wrong.
We went in early in the morning on January 3rd - DH had been on night shift and due to getting so little vacation he worked and took off a few hours early to take me to the hospital. When I woke up he was already sitting in the den on the computer and came in the bedroom to talk to me while I showered and got ready to go to the hospital. Older DS was at my parents house so he would not have to get up super early and sit in the waiting room alone all of that time.
At the hospital we were placed in a triage room while they did all of the prep and everyone from the OR team came in to introduce themselves, confirm information and to let us know what to expect. Around 7:20am I walked down to the OR & DH stayed in the hall to get in his scrubs while they started my spinal. I got settled and at one moment I looked at the nurse and told her I was going to throw up and she put something in my IV and poof that feeling was gone. It did not take long before Joshua was born - 7:42am - weighing 7lbs, 11oz and 20 inches long. They offered to let me hold him but I was so nervous and shaky I was scared I would drop him. They put him close to my face and he was perfect. They took him and DH to recovery so they could do some monitoring (since I had been on insulin they had to check his blood sugar regularly) and they could wait for me. DH called our families and our church from Recovery while waiting for me. It was not long until my tubal ligation was done and they stitched me up. I remember the doctor and nurses talking about investing while sewing me up. We were in recovery for about 90 minutes and then they transferred me to my room.
The hospital was great and let us get settled in our room and then DH went out to get Justin so he could meet his little brother without the grandparents all crowding him. We had discussed this with him in advance and this is what he wanted. After that we opened the flood gates for the grandparents and other family to visit.