New to this board... feeling really old at DD's PRE-K — The Bump
Parenting after 35

New to this board... feeling really old at DD's PRE-K

So, I had my DD at 35, almost 36 which means I'm 41 now that she is in PRE-K and 5 years old.   Most of the other moms are about 10 years younger than me.  I have strange feelings about being so old and feel like I don't fit in or something, I can't put my finger on it but I don't like being so self conscious about my age.  Has anyone else experienced this?  Am I crazy?

Re: New to this board... feeling really old at DD's PRE-K

  • I am sensitive about my age, as well, considering I am about 10-15 years old than most moms of a 1.5 and 3.5 year old. It is was it is, we can't change it.  Just because we're a little older doesn't mean that we won't have the same interests as the other moms.
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  • We go to our church playgroup every Wednesday (crap.. gotta get moving!!) and most of the mommies are in their mid-late 20s.   But there are a couple of ladies in their late 30s, too, so it's not so bad.  But I certainly can't get on the floor and play as much as some of the girls!

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  • I turned 35 in December and had my 1st DD that June and then with my second DD, I turned 37 in December and had her in March.  I would say with my kids, about half the parents are older and the rest are pretty young.  My DH is 3 years younger than I am and most of our friends had kids around the same time that we did so I don't find myself feeling like old mom all that often even though I am older than most of our friends (I didn't grow up here but DH did, my friends are out of stat and I would say within my circle about half or a little less had kids in their 20's while the rest are more like me and had them in their 30's).  Funny thing is that most of the kids that my kids are friends with, the parents are on the older side.  I find that I have a harder issue relating to the stay at home moms vs the working moms like me more so than the age thing.  I have more in common with the older working moms than the older stay at home moms and just feel like I can relate more to their life and the things they are going through.  The only time I felt really old was doing the name game with a random parent at daycare who said I looked familar to her - turned out that she was a good 15 years younger than me!!!   I look young for my age (so I have been told) and am amazed when I find out the ages of some people.  I have a co-worker who is a year older than me, has an 18 year old son and she looks a lot older than me.  I try to live by "age is more about how you feel than an actual number".
    Jenni Mom to DD#1 - 6-16-06 DD#2 - 3-13-08 
  • imagefredalina:
    Thankfully I look younger than my age IMO. But I admit to being totally taken aback at DD's first court hearing when her birthfather's attorney approached me and asked if I was her (30 year old) birthfather's mom. I guess the newborn lack of sleep did more damage than I thought! (LO was a foster child before we adopted her).
    GTF outta town! That's horrible.

    And I thin I can beat everyone with the "I feel old and out of place" vibe. I usually look much younger than my 38 years, but I'm disabled and get around by using a granny-tastic cane or scooter. Nobody knows what the heck to make of me.

  • I'm new to this board... Bumping from phone so apologies in advance for the spacing ... I am 38 with a 4 month old and feel Luke the old lady who lived in a shoe while dropping P off at daycare. All the other moms are mid 20 s and very vogue like. I'm all for it but am lucky I have on a decent top and jeans.... And to ask if u were the grandmother. Jeez. I might have said a few unpleasant words....
  • I'm 41 with a 2 & 3.5 yo and I get where you are coming from, but it doesn't bother me. There are always going to be people older/younger/richer/poorer/more or less educated than me. I like nice, common-sense people regardless of age :)

    A person asking me if I'm my husband's mother would not fall into that category (what a moron!).

  • I had DD at 39, almost 40, and at first I felt pretty old, but then I discovered that where I live, older moms are not that uncommon.  There are a lot of moms who are a good 10 years younger than me, but a lot who are around my general age (which, to save the math, is 46).  Usually it doesn't bother me.  But, one time at a playgroup w/my DS when he was about 8 mos old (he'll be 2 next week), a woman overheard me talking w/a friend.  We were talking about when we graduated high school (turned out we went to high school near each other) and this other woman turned to me and said, "Wait - you're as old as my mom!"  THEN...she proceeded to say, "You're brave!".  Not sure what to make of that comment. 

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  • I am lucky that my daycare is mostly older moms. I work with college students so I have been feeling old for several years now. :-(
  • I'm 41 but I look younger, not 10 yrs younger, but I guess young enough not to feel weird among younger moms. I don't really care what they think, I'm so happy to be an older mom to Adrian. Some of those younger moms are not as happy, since they haven't lived their lives like I did prior to having a child. My only complaint is I have far less energy now and I get tired more often than in my 20s.
    Me: 44 DH: 42. DS born healthy at 40 weeks 8/24/09. TTC since then with no luck or ART. Surprise BFP 8/6/14... MMC @ 8 weeks 4 days... Miss you everyday sweet baby angel.
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