How do you teach the older sibling?

battybtags

How do you teach the older sibling to be gentle with a baby?

A loves being a big sister, but she is not gentle at all. We have a cat so shes had to learn the gentle thing a long time ago and did ok with it. She is constantlly in the baby's face and wanting to touch her/maul her. It always ends up with us scolding her because she gets rough very quickly even if we're right there. I had C in the PNP and was right in the room and A went over and dragged her across the PNP by her legs! I really can't trust them alone for even a second, which makes using the bathroom fun for me! We've given her some time outs when she gets too rough and have given her lots of praise when she is gentle, but I dont know what else to do. I think she knows better, but part of me thinks she likes the attention she gets when we do scold her. Ideas?

TinaL99

It's really hard and we're still working on it. 

Confession: Stella pulled Audrey off of the couch one day =(  She landed on the carpet, thank goodness, but I felt horrible.  I've also caught Stella trying to pick Audrey up a few times.  Also, when we lay Audrey on her activity may, Stella sometimes tries to sit on her.

I try to keep Audrey elevated somewhere (in the Bumbo or bouncy seat up on the table, while keeping an eye on her, of course) or at least strapped in the bouncy seat or just lying on the floor.  We just keep reminding Stella to be gentle and ask to touch her.  I'm not sure when it will sink in.  You're not alone!

octoberbridesrule

I will sometimes bring the LO in with me to the bathroom. And Viv likes to go "eye" and poke her sister in the eye. I hope it gets better too.

abba916

L was like this at first with X- but it has worn off...He still wants to hug and touch X but he is way more gentle now...might be time (its fun while you are waiting...)

we also gave L lots of opportunities to touch L- like he could always touch his feet (he never was rough with them) or when we would sit on the couch I would let L "hold" X almost every time he asked...that seemed to help- it wasnt like X was taboo- we took the "fun" out of it... 

mrsoc

E would hit A when I was nursing, this stopped once the nursing stopped (I am sure because A was nursing for hours upon hours, and E just wanted attention), but reared it's head once A started moving more.  Now he hits, pushes, sits on him...  Time out worked for a little while, but then that was ineffective.  As my post said this weekend, we were at our wit's end.  DH picked up the book Happiest Toddler on the Block.  I have used the techniques last night and this morning, and so far they have worked .  It is a "primitive" way of looking at things, but the book has a lot of info that just makes sense.  It is a lot about using gestures instead of words and then helping them to express their feelings.  I will keep you posted.  In the beginning, I was the same way and would make sure that A was strapped in the bouncy chair or with me.  It made it really hard to get a shower in